Lawyers!

spudington16 · 07-07-2005 9:53pm #1

An lawyer was sitting in his office late one night, when the Devil appeared before him. The Devil told the lawyer, 'I have a proposition for you. You can win every case you try, for the rest of your life. Your clients will adore you, your colleagues will stand in awe of you, and you will make embarrassing sums of money. All I want in exchange is your soul, your wife's soul, your children's souls, the souls of your parents, grandparents, and parents-in-law, and the souls of all of your friends and law partners.'

The lawyer thought about this for a moment, then asked, 'So, what's the catch?'

Gone West · 07-07-2005 9:56pm

FuzzyLogic thought about this for a moment, then asked, "so where's the punchline"

Ishmael · 07-07-2005 10:15pm

ba dum dum tcsh

Maximilian · 08-07-2005 1:51pm

I think the catch was that he would have to hand over his soul and that of everyone he knew.

MooShop · 08-07-2005 1:55pm

FuzzyLogic wrote:

FuzzyLogic thought about this for a moment, then asked, "so where's the punchline"

nice one

joejoem · 08-07-2005 3:35pm

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Tumbleweed............................................................

Zapho · 08-07-2005 3:45pm

Ok, I'm outta here..........<slam!>

Orion · 08-07-2005 3:49pm

Lawyers should never ask a witness a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.
In a trial, a Southern small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grand motherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?" She responded, "Why, yes I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you’ve been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs.
You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

The Lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defence attorney?" She again replied, "Why yes, I do.
I've known Mr. Bradley*since he was a youngster too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him."

The defence attorney almost died.
The judge asked both counsellors to approach the bench and in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you b@stards asks her if she knows me, I'll jail you for contempt."