Would you let your daughter go to a Debs?

Beekay

im not a parent.
but would you let your 15 year old daughter(3 months off 16) go to a debs
With a just turned 18 year old.
He doesn't drink and she wouldn't be either.

Beruthiel

eventually
you have to let go
so
yes
with rules and a curfew though!

Beekay

yeah.i was thinking with a curfew aswell.because debs usually go on into the next day.i wouldn't mind if she had to leave early.as long as she was allowed go

Dellgirl

im not a parent.
but would you let your 15 year old daughter(3 months off 16) go to a debs
With a just turned 18 year old.
He doesn't drink and she wouldn't be either.

_________________

I am suspecting you are the one wanting to go! Your quite keen to point out the fact that the Debette (?) is nearly 16.
Rules and curfew. Whoever...*ahem*...is going will ruin all future trust if those set are not strictly adhered to.
Id let the person go.

Shad0r

Beekay wrote:

im not a parent.
but would you let your 15 year old daughter(3 months off 16) go to a debs
With a just turned 18 year old.
He doesn't drink and she wouldn't be either.

HELL NO. Either the 18yo is
a) lying
b) into drugs (hence the lack of interest in drink)
c) the worlds most boring teenager.

I dunno how long ago its been since the people who replied went to their debs but I very distinctly remember what both of the debs I went to were like and neither were the sort of event that I'd want my fifteen year old daughter at, assuming I had a fifteen year old daughter. (Which I dont as I'd have been ten when I had her )

Dellgirl

I dunno how long ago its been since the people who replied went to their debs but I very distinctly remember what both of the debs I went to were like and neither were the sort of event that I'd want my fifteen year old daughter at, assuming I had a fifteen year old daughter. (Which I dont as I'd have been ten when I had her )

:eek:
Im 29 so Im only 4 years older than you!
That being said, I went to debs down the country where the kids arent so cool and the priest was there all night. I dont think I even heard of a joint till i was about 18. God, I was so innocent/naieve/clueles.

You do realise now that when the postr goes to show this survey to her....sorry....I mean that girls mother, she wont be allowed go now. Youve runed her whole life. I hope youre proud!

tirl

with the no under 18 after 10 o clock rule she will have to leave early anyway, I know of one hotel last year that made everyone under 18 go into another room at the hotel to watch videos and yes they were over 18's videos!

pwd

only if the date paid for a hotel room for her or something.
Wouldn't want her coming home late and waking the whole house.

Beekay

Shad0r wrote:

HELL NO. Either the 18yo is
a) lying
b) into drugs (hence the lack of interest in drink)
c) the worlds most boring teenager.

I dunno how long ago its been since the people who replied went to their debs but I very distinctly remember what both of the debs I went to were like and neither were the sort of event that I'd want my fifteen year old daughter at, assuming I had a fifteen year old daughter. (Which I dont as I'd have been ten when I had her )

I don't drink because of past experiences(not with me but my family)
And i just want to spend a good night with my girlfriend

marshmallow

I would say yes. I'd know I'd get pi$$ed off if I wasn't allowed go with my boyfriend.

P.s. My bro is going 19 in December and he hasn't touched a drop of alcho. He's not boring, he goes out to clubs with his mates but just has soft drinks. It's 'cause he wants to not drink and that's the only reason.

Just thought I'd add that in there!

Yv

I'd say yes too. 15 is very young but if she's almost 16 & you're not too far past 18 it's not too much of a difference - with a curfew it's perfectly alright.

Also, I don't drink and I'm over 18. It's never appealed to me. I still have a social life :rolleyes:

Beekay

Yv wrote:

I'd say yes too. 15 is very young but if she's almost 16 & you're not too far past 18 it's not too much of a difference - with a curfew it's perfectly alright.

Also, I don't drink and I'm over 18. It's never appealed to me. I still have a social life :rolleyes:

i know its a typical irish view....you can't have fun without alcohol

Kevin_rc_ie

i'd stick condoms in her purse.

Nevyn

You need to sit and talk with her parents.
You may have to leave early to get her home at the time they say.
You may have to collect her from thier care and be able to drop her back
happy but tired and no worse for wear by midnight.
Go talk to them.
Be reasonible and respectful and hopefully they will too.

Nevyn

really Kevin, you'd give your 15 year old daughter condoms just like that ?

Kevin_rc_ie

yes i would.

Nevyn

sure as hell hope that would not be the extent of the sexuality education you will give your kids if you ever have any.

Put this is moving off topic.

Honestly go and talk with her parents and if needs be get your mother to have
a talk with her mother.

Kevin_rc_ie

you're right it wouldn't be.

Beekay

i would definately be resonible and i'd make sure all the rules were met.
i'd rather a have half a good night with her rather than a full crap one with nobody.

loyatemu

mate, if she's 15 and you're 18, it's illegal, so don't even think about it, right!

Nevyn

loyatemu

He is talking about bringing her to his debs a socail even with dinner and dancing ffs.

that type of comment is unhelpful and off topic.

Beekay

loyatemu wrote:

mate, if she's 15 and you're 18, it's illegal, so don't even think about it, right!

Did i ever mention the word sex? No. Some people on this forum have to stop generalising everything.If your 18 you must drink,If your 18 you must be having sex.Im f**king sick of it.And anyway,Just because its a law doesn't mean its right.If A couple both feel they are at a point in their relationship that they are ready for sex,should they restrain their feelings for each other
just because a law says so.And as long as they do it responsibly.

up for anything

Beekay wrote:

... Just because its a law doesn't mean its right.If A couple both feel they are at a point in their relationship that they are ready for sex,should they restrain their feelings for each other
just because a law says so.And as long as they do it responsibly.

Oops, you had my backing, for what it was worth, until this bit.

Laws are there for a reason obviously. Most of them are in place to ensure people's safety and allow them to go about their lives without having to live in fear of other people's actions. A lot of people in jail could say "just because it's a law doesn't mean it's right". Personally, now, I wouldn't trust you with my car, my house, my dog and most especially my fifteen year old daughter in whom I have invested so much love and care and would be capable of killing for ("just because it's a law doesn't mean it's right". She may be physically mature but mentally and emotionally she is now only just begining the journey to maturity.

The law stipulating an age for legal sex is there for a reason and a very, very good reason. Not just to spoil your fun and ensure the blueness of your balls. Do the words statutory rape and child molestation mean anything to you. If you're as mature as you think you are, they should. Remember some day you may have a fifteen year old daughter!

No, in my opinion Cinderella shouldn't be allowed go to the ball.

Edited to add that you expose your own immaturity at 18 by some of the things you have said, hence the girl in question cannot hope to have attained even the same level as you even if she will be sixteen in three months. :rolleyes:

Beekay

up for anything wrote:

("just because it's a law doesn't mean it's right". She may be physically mature but mentally and emotionally she is now only just begining the journey to maturity

Thats why i said when they get to a certain point in their relationship.how do you know if its in 2 weeks or 4 years?

Beekay

up for anything wrote:

The law stipulating an age for legal sex is there for a reason and a very, very good reason. Not just to spoil your fun and ensure the blueness of your balls. Do the words statutory rape and child molestation mean anything to you. If you're as mature as you think you are, they should. Remember some day you may have a fifteen year old daughter!

I know its not just there to spoil my fun or "the blueness of my balls"(which doesn't sound very mature for someone trying to lecture other people about maturity).

"if your as mature as you think you are" Where did i say i thought i was very mature?

angeldelight

I have to say I think the OP is getting a bit of a hard time. He has said he's willing to be responsible and leave early to get his gf back home on time, that he won't be drinking, hence he can keep an eye out for her. Speaking from personal experience I had sex under the legal age and over it, and there was no difference between the two. A lot of guys would have sex with someone without having as much respect/love for their partner as this guy seems to have for his gf..... you could cut him a bit of slack

up for anything

Beekay wrote:

Thats why i said when they get to a certain point in their relationship.how do you know if its in 2 weeks or 4 years?

I'm not claiming to know at what point it's right in a relationship just saying that at the age of fifteen most girls are not emotionally equipped to deal with a sexual relationship along with all the other things in their lives. Yes people do have sex before they are legally of age (and yes there is the argument of what difference does one day make) and suffer no apparent harm but it doesn't make it right.

oq4v3ht0u76kf2

up for anything wrote:

I'm not claiming to know at what point it's right in a relationship just saying that at the age of fifteen most girls are not emotionally equipped to deal with a sexual relationship along with all the other things in their lives. Yes people do have sex before they are legally of age (and yes there is the argument of what difference does one day make) and suffer no apparent harm but it doesn't make it right.

Me and my ex-girlfriend both had sex for the first time, with each other, at the age of fifteen and we were together for almost three years after that! Not all, but plenty of fifteen year olds are very capable of being part of a sexual relationship - the only reason people think otherwise is modern societies habit of unnaturally lengthening the adolescent process.

As regards the actual topic, fair play to you for not drinking - I wish I'd stuck to that - and I'm sure your intentions with this girl are nothing but honourable, however by debating the topic here you are talking to the wrong people.

As my mother often said when I told her "but their parents let them stay out late" - I'm not their mother, and you're not their brother, so what I say goes! Talk to her parents about it, find out why they object to the idea and see if you can nullify their concerns!

Beekay

up for anything wrote:

I'm not claiming to know at what point it's right in a relationship just saying that at the age of fifteen most girls are not emotionally equipped to deal with a sexual relationship along with all the other things in their lives. Yes people do have sex before they are legally of age (and yes there is the argument of what difference does one day make) and suffer no apparent harm but it doesn't make it right.

I can see where you are coming from.Thats why i would make sure whatever time it is,that it was the right time to have sex.And if there was any doubt from either of us than it wasn't the right time?

Could we please get back on topic

county

quite simply no

up for anything

Beekay wrote:

"if your as mature as you think you are" Where did i say i thought i was very mature?

You didn't say it and I didn't say you said it. Your posts were implying it however.

You asked a question "but would you let your 15 year old daughter(3 months off 16) go to a debs.." which I answered from the point of view of being a parent of a nearly 11 year old girl with all this in her future. I know you've probably heard "someday when you have a daughter of your own... yada yada yada" or in your case "son" a lot from your parents (I did from mine and I didn't realise what they were getting at then) you probably switch off but then that's the nature of youth.