**** happens

StupidLikeAFox

http://www.gnu.org/fun/jokes/****-happens.html

grimloch

Broken link.

Maybe because there's a bold word involved?

oq4v3ht0u76kf2

**** HAPPENS
in various world religions


TAOISM: **** happens.

CONFUCIANISM: Confucius say, "**** happens".

ZEN: (What is the sound of **** happening?)

JESUITISM: If **** happens and when nobody is watching, is it really ****?

ISLAM: **** happens if it is the will of Allah.

COMMUNISM. Equal **** happens to all people.

CATHOLICISM: **** happens because you are bad.

PSYCHOANALYSIS: **** happens because of your toilet training.

SCIENTOLOGY: **** happens if you're on our **** list.

ZOROASTRIANISM: Bad **** happens, and good **** happens.

UNITARIANISM: Maybe **** happens. Let's have coffee and donuts.

RIGHT-WING PROTESTANTISM: Let this **** happen to someone else.

JUDAISM: Why does **** always happen to US?

REFORM JUDAISM: Got any Kaopectate?

MYSTICISM: What weird ****!

AGNOSTICISM: What is this ****?

ATHEISM: I don't believe this ****!

NIHILISM: Who needs this ****?

AZTEC: Cut out this ****!

QUAKER: Let's not fight over this ****.

FORTEANISM: No ****??

12-STEP: I am powerless to cut the ****.

VOODOO: Hey, that **** looks just like you!

NEWAGE: Visualize **** not happening.

DEISM: **** just happens.

EXISTENTIALISM: **** doesn't happen; **** is.

SECULAR HUMANISM: **** evolves.

CHRISTIAN SCIENCE: **** is in your mind.

BUDDHISM: **** happens, but pay no mind.

SHINTOISM: **** is everywhere.

HINDUISM: This **** has happened before.

WICCA: Mix this **** together and make it happen!

HASIDISM: **** never happens the same way twice.

THEOSOPHY: You don't know half of the **** that happens.

DIANETICS: Your mother gave you **** before your were born.

SEVENTH DAY ADVENTIST: No **** on Saturdays.

JEHOVAH's WITNESSES: No **** happens until Armageddon.

MOONIES: Only happy **** really happens.

HOPI: Corn fertilizer happens.

BAHA'I: It's all the same ****.

STOICISM: This **** is good for me.

OBJECTIVISM: Our **** is good for you.

EST: If my **** bothers you, that's your fault.

REAGANISM: Don't move; the **** will trickle down.

FASCISM: **** makes the trains run on time.

CARGO CULT: A barge will come and take all the **** away.

EMACS: Hold down Control-Meta-****.

DISCORDIANISM: Some funny **** happened to me today.

RASTAFARIANISM: Let's smoke this ****.

CHARISMATIC: This is not **** and it doesn't smell bad.

MASONIC: **** happens, but we can't discuss it during Lodge.

RED CROSS: **** happens - send money.

Someone sent us a request to remove his own religion from the list, as a matter of "respect". Here's how RMS replied:

I wrote this version of the list (adding to earlier versions that
circulated on the net). I am not going to make the change you
request.

My own view on the issue of religion, Atheism, is made fun of in this
list. The religion of my ancestors is also included. Even the
Church of Emacs is included. You may think your religion
deserves more respect than others, but I don't. No one is entitled to
that kind of "respect".

So this item will remain in the list.

Other humor in the GNU Humor Collection.

StupidLikeAFox

Over to you bob---