Met someone from internet dating site

LegacyUser

Hello,

I have recently started internet dating and have even met someone. I thought we were getting on good but I noticed a change in his behaviour where emails, textings and phone calls are concerned.

We emailed, texted and talked on the phone for about 4 weeks before we met, I really enjoyed our date together and fancied him.

It has now been 3 weeks since we met but we haven't met again. I asked him to a party the 2nd week but he declined and last weekend he just did stuff around his house with no mention of ever meeting up again. We were still talking on phone, emailing and texting each other up until a few days ago.

My question is to the guys: If this was you - would you have a hidden agenda ie don't want to see me again or what??

I'm totally confused here as much as I would like to get to know him and see where this would / could go - I don't want to waste my time.

PS: I don't feel ready to ask him this question yet, any ideas / help would be great.

[Jackass]

Well the first question that springs to mind is did you sleep with him? Cause if you did it may have just been a one night stand to him, and he wants to leave it at that.....

Anyway, i think you're far too invested in a relationship, if you can even call it that, that's only a couple of months old (?), and you've only met once....if you are doing the internet dating thing, it's probably best not focus so much on one individual so much, untill you are meeting them on a regular basis, and could safely define it as a relationship, otherwise you will come across desperate or clingy, which will make any guy run a mile...my advise, play it cooler, play the field a bit more....find a few guys you like, go on lots of dates with them all, and hopefully one of them will develop into a full blown relationship....

To be blunt, and answer your question simply, from what you have said, i wouldn't imagine he wants to see you again, but that's only my opinion, and i only have a couple of lines of text to define the entire events of the two months...so your only option if you really like him is to call him and tell him you like him and would he be interested in more.....if you don't want to waist your time, cut to the chase and ask him.

AARRRGH

My gut instinct is: he already has a girlfriend.

If I were you I'd stop contacting him. I know this is probably a hard thing to do, but it will make him have to chase you (guys *generally* hate it when the girl is chasing him) and it will also save your dignity!

Jonny Arson

dublindude wrote:

If I were you I'd stop contacting him. I know this is probably a hard thing to do, but it will make him have to chase you (guys *generally* hate it when the girl is chasing him) and it will also save your dignity!

I totally agree with every word said there.

Keep things cool, if he's interested he will make contact with you. You have only met once so IMO it's a case that he may not be interested sadly.

WhiteWashMan

Unreggie wrote:

I don't want to waste my time. .

if you dont want to waste your time, then why are you posting here?

we dont know him. we dont know what he is thinking, who he is, what he is like, or what his agenda is.

if you want to know whats going on, then ask him.

then and only then will you know.

if you feel you are getting the run about, then stop texting, talking, and find someone new. you have met the guy once, and while an online relationship can be quite intense, the fact remains that you have no ties.

are you afraid of what he will say if you ask him directly?

worse case scenario is he tells you he is not interested. will you be that devestated, or are you that deperate that you need him to want you?

eskimo

I think that the honest answer to your question is this: he isn't that into you. He may have liked you at first and then gone off you. I know it sucks and I'm really sorry for you but it's better that you know the truth (what it seems to ME is the truth anyway).

Try not to dwell on this person. Move onwards and upwards and learn from your experience. Forget about this guy, there WILL be plenty more!

Smile!

Trx

Yeah ... Forget about him... bUt do let us know if you slept with him... That CAN be a deciding factor......

FranknFurter

Dont contact him, if he contacts you your question will be answered. If he does'nt, then it will be answered too.
Dont make yourself the "backup" to him by being the one thats there and fancies him.

Men, in general are a right shower of twats........ cept for us fags, now *WE* know how to get women!!

vibrant

It sounds like he's not at all keen to be honest. You'd be much better off stopping all contact with him, as it's just wasting your time.

He should have cut to the chase earlier though, and told you that he wasn't interested - it would have saved him having to come up with his silly "I'm doing stuff around my house!" excuse...

simu

[cliché] He's just not that into you! [/cliché]

LegacyUser

Me again

Thanks for all the opinions but in answer to the question did I sleep with him - No I Did Not.

chump

Did you have relations with him?

It sounds to me that when you met him, you found him hot, he didn't find you hot.

It also sounds like he does enjoy communicating with you but isn't attracted to you, and he's just not dealing with it very well...

IMO

ando

I think chump has got it about right there