Relocating to the country

Dreamer 7

Hi
Im in a bit of a muudel and could do with some advice.
Basically at the moment my fiance myself and our 2 children are living in a 1 bed cottage! The landlord is my dad who charges us little or no rent. Our 3 yr contract is up now and 2 options have been put on the table
1 Buy half the house , get extension and split profit on sale( the house is in Dublin City Centre and has double in value over 3 yrs)

Or
2 Buy another house with value of 220,000 get a mortgage for 100,000 and dad gives remainder as long term interest free loan

My friends think Im mad to think this is a problem but I would like to stay close to my family in Dublin. However I want better for my children. The price range would buy a 4/5 bed house in Donegal ( we have a family holiday home here so its familiar to me)

Am I crazy to stay in dublin in a 1 bed
Should i move purely for the good of the kids, what happens if i distance myself from my Dublin friends and family

Any advice would be great!

Gordon

Hey Dreamer 7, I'll move this to a forum more appropriate to your problem, Personal Issues. There is also the "Accomodation/Property" forum which would deal more with the housing side of your problem so if you want it there instead let me or the PI mods know on this thread.

Victor

Are you planning on getting married? You may be putting your finances at risk if there is ever a break-up.

Dreamer 7 wrote:

1 Buy half the house

This may have stamp duty implications, although there are parent-to-child exemptions/reductions.

2 Buy another house with value of 220,000 get a mortgage for 100,000 and dad gives remainder as long term interest free loan

This agin may have stamp duty implications if your father's interest in the property impinges on your first time buyer status.

ARGINITE

Ya I think its a bit crazy to stay in a one bed room house if you have two children. Finding a bigger house in dublin would real cost an arm and a leg. So moving to the country would be the best option in my opinion.

secret_squirrel

Dreamer 7 wrote:

However I want better for my children. The price range would buy a 4/5 bed house in Donegal ( we have a family holiday home here so its familiar to me)

My parents moved to the country when I was young and I often wonder how my personality would have turned out if they hadnt. Basically Im quite introverted and wonder what I would have turned out like if I had had more kids to socialise with. Having said all that - loved growing up in the country.
Difficult choice tbh.

LegacyUser

I wonder about that too. Would I have more confidence if I'd grown up in a town or city wich would have been, in my opinion, better places to grow. I've now got a kind of dead rural virginal life. I don't think it's right to raise children in the middle of nowhere, if that's the kind of place you're moving to in Donegal. Those places are fine for holidays, but not for the quiet Summer months spent looking out at the fields or on Winter evenings when it gets dark before 6 and everybody and everything is a car journey away.

leeroybrown

secret_squirrel wrote:

My parents moved to the country when I was young and I often wonder how my personality would have turned out if they hadnt. Basically Im quite introverted and wonder what I would have turned out like if I had had more kids to socialise with. Having said all that - loved growing up in the country.

To balance this up, I grew up in a rural area and have plenty of friends who are anything but introverted.

Unreg010101 wrote:

I wonder about that too. Would I have more confidence if I'd grown up in a town or city wich would have been, in my opinion, better places to grow. I've now got a kind of dead rural virginal life. I don't think it's right to raise children in the middle of nowhere, if that's the kind of place you're moving to in Donegal. Those places are fine for holidays, but not for the quiet Summer months spent looking out at the fields or on Winter evenings when it gets dark before 6 and everybody and everything is a car journey away.

I get the impression that in some peoples minds 'living in the country' means being in a craggy field in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by wild sheep and five miles from the nearest shop or pub. While this is true for some people, living in the country will quite often mean living near or in a rural town or village. You can be in an area with plenty of people, community spirit, amenities, etc and still be in the country. There are also plenty of nice rural areas within very short travelling distances of some of the larger towns in the countryside.

The above points made, I will say that I definitely prefer to live in a more urban area (Galway in my case). Conversely, I will say that I think a rural or smaller urban area with decent amenities is a better place for kids to grow up than in a large city.

As for your choice, what you really need to do is balance up what you gain by moving your family versus what you lose by leaving your roots in Dublin. Moving away from family, friends, jobs, etc is a big change.

Are your kids old enough that it might big upheaval from them to move? Will there actually be sufficient schools, amenities, etc for your kids in the area that you're thinking of moving to?

I would also suggest that moving purely for your kids when your heart is not in it would be a bad idea. You might just end up being unhappy and kids pick up on things like that.

ARGINITE

I would pick growing up in the country over than the city.

I've now got a kind of dead rural virginal life.

I dont think it causes the above thats something you have to fix by leaving the countryside every so often to meet more people.

LegacyUser

IMO a rural environment is a much better place to raise children than in a dirty concrete world.

Less traffic,pollution,crime,crowds,noise,weirdos,perverts,thugs,anti-social behaviour,stolen cars etc etc.....

More Fresh air,peace,peace of mind,greenery,scenery,Space,Life etc..

BTW I come from and still live in Dirty Filthy Dublin and will be relocating to rural bliss ASAP ...

comad

secret_squirrel wrote:

My parents moved to the country when I was young and I often wonder how my personality would have turned out if they hadnt. Basically Im quite introverted and wonder what I would have turned out like if I had had more kids to socialise with.

So true. Whenever, I look back on my childhood, all I can remember is doing things on my own ie going for cycles on my own, kicking a ball against a wall, watching TV on my own. I didn't even have a brother. I think it is something to do with what I'm like now. I seem to have a small circle of friends and I really don't like big groups. if I had to live in the country again, my mental health would diminish rapidly

secret_squirrel

Relocating... wrote:

IMO a rural environment is a much better place to raise children than in a dirty concrete world.

Less traffic,pollution,crime,crowds,noise,weirdos,perverts,thugs,anti-social behaviour,stolen cars etc etc.....

More Fresh air,peace,peace of mind,greenery,scenery,Space,Life etc..

BTW I come from and still live in Dirty Filthy Dublin and will be relocating to rural bliss ASAP ...

Have you tried living in the country yet?

Try getting fresh air after the farmer has been round with his shít thrower. Or the choking smell of oil seed rape over the summer.

Try having all the windows sealed tight coz they are crop spraying/harvesting/the oil seed rape is flowering.

Nutters with guns around at night shooting rabbits etc.

The Hunt.

Having to drive everywhere

Having said all that I would love to live in the country again - but I would never bring my kids up there.

LegacyUser

Would anything stop you from buying in greater Dublin, like one of Dublin's towns or villages? Or failing that, a town or another city anywhere else in the country?

I'd just like to restate that it's hard to imagine what's bad about living in the countryside until you've lived there. I think the worst thing is distance and having to go everywhere by car. If your children want to go anywhere they're at the mercy of their parents since they have to be driven, and what if you're tired and don't feel like driving? And you do drive them but you moan about it a bit first and make them feel like they're a nuisance for wanting to go anywhere. I've lived it. It wasn't nice.

Victor

secret_squirrel wrote:

Nutters with guns around at night shooting rabbits etc.

Or guys with bird scarers that fire, once a minute, every minute, all night ...

weemcd

Victor wrote:

Or guys with bird scarers that fire, once a minute, every minute, all night ...

one of them outside now, bastard of a think, once every 5 minutes or so tho.

Tbh you need a mix of both lives, atm personally i like living in the country as i am only a few miles from town (armagh, crappy place but i like it alright) any further away and id probably loose my sanity

Also remember it is very important that your kids arent home alone all the time, when they should be out interacting more.

secret_squirrel

Unreg010101 wrote:

If your children want to go anywhere they're at the mercy of their parents since they have to be driven, and what if you're tired and don't feel like driving? And you do drive them but you moan about it a bit first and make them feel like they're a nuisance for wanting to go anywhere. I've lived it. It wasn't nice.

Omg are you my Da?


@Weemcd - Nail on the head there.

Dagon

I live in Sligo, and it has the perfect mix of urban life and country life for my tastes. I lived in Dublin for a while, but the constant rat-race drove me nuts. Need some fresh air and some space every now and then, so I can't see myself living in a big city for a long period of time.

By the way, when Dublin people say "the country", does this actually mean countryside, or is it any area of land (be it village, town, or large city) that exists beyond the greater Dublin region?

iguana

Dagon wrote:

By the way, when Dublin people say "the country", does this actually mean countryside, or is it any area of land (be it village, town, or large city) that exists beyond the greater Dublin region?

Little bit of column A, Little bit of column B.

I've also known people in Dublin who tend to think that anyone who isn't from a capital city as being from the country. Like Birmingham or New York.

To the Op, if you like where you live and have room to extend I'd probably do that. If that isn't possible then consider all your options. There is a lot in between central Dublin and the wilds of Donegal. And what about you and your partners work options? Will they be the same in Donegal, and people do generally earn less outside of Dublin, so while you might have a bigger house in Donegal will you have trouble with the repayments.

Do you both drive and have a car each now? If not you will have to if you want any independance from each other and you will have to factor in those costs as well.

jimmycrackcorm

Can people not realize that "moving down the country" is not the same as "moving down to the fields". For example The OPS 220,000 would buy a very nice 4/5 bed house in Letterkenny, a town with a theatre, multi-screen cinema, swimming pool, shopping centres etc all within easy walking distance.

The only reason I can think off to remain in Dublin is choice of jobs. New friends are easier made outside the pale.