Flatmates/Renting and the like

MicraBoy

I want to rent out a room in my house. I was wondering what peoples opinions are on telling potential flatmates about being me being gay?

I'm of the opinion I'm not obliged to say anything, but can't help feel I should say something out of courtesy. They'll cop on fairly lively when the bf is hanging around all the time and sleeping my bedroom! But will I have done myself a disservice by not having mentioned it before? Any thoughts guyz and galz?

dory

You don't have to tell anyone you're gay! But, realisticly, it might save hassle.

I'm moving into student accom with 4 strangers in a few weeks. Not looking forward to telling them!

Beruthiel

I honestly don't see how it's anyone's business tbh.
Look at it the other way, if you were looking for somewhere to live and the landlord asked if you were gay, you would be really pissed off as he has no right to ask a question like that.
Do not feel oblidged to say anything

damien

Actually, I would let the person know as even today it can be an issue for some people. If that person is uncomfortable around gay people for some reason it might be better for him/her and you for it to be known in advance.

While you may say it is their problem and they should deal with it, what happens if they deal with it by moving out within the month, causing more hassle and expense to you?

I wouldn't explicitly state it or ask it in question form though. No need saying something like "By the way I'm gay and there'll be other gay people around including my boyfriend, is that ok?" Maybe try something like "There's no problems having guests stay over, my boyfriend often stays over." or something like that. That should be enough for alarm bells to go off in the head of anyone that would have an issue and I'm sure they'd just decline from renting the room.

dictatorcat

Since you're in the position of renting, i'd suggest dropping subtle hints such as saying "my boyfriend stays around every so often" or someting along those lines, that way if the potential tenant is a homophobic twat they just won't take the room. I doubt if you'll have any trouble finding anyone if it's a nice place.

Boston

I think they would be pissed off if their renting a room from you and you don't tell them. Regardless of whether or not they have a problem with gay people. If you where just renting a room as well as someone else, then I'd agree that you where under no obligation, but since you're the landlord I think you have to be straight with your tenants right from the start.

damien.m wrote:

I wouldn't explicitly state it or ask it in question form though. No need saying something like "By the way I'm gay and there'll be other gay people around including my boyfriend, is that ok?" Maybe try something like "There's no problems having guests stay over, my boyfriend often stays over." or something like that. That should be enough for alarm bells to go off in the head of anyone that would have an issue and I'm sure they'd just decline from renting the room.

while I'd agree with not making a huge deal out of it, I'd be straight to the point and direct.

claire h

No, you're not obliged to say anything, but I'd be inclined to mention it simply because you're going to be having someone over a lot, and they deserve to know who's going to be around the place they'll be living in. And by bringing it up you're weeding out anyone who might have a problem with it, which will save yourself a lot of hassle.

bopper

I shared a room with a straight guy for my entire second year of college. I never had to tell him I was gay, he just figured it out for himself and he wasn't bothered by it. It never became a problem.

snappieT

bopper wrote:

I shared a room with a straight guy for my entire second year of college. I never had to tell him I was gay, he just figured it out for himself and he wasn't bothered by it. It never became a problem.

Well that room-mate was class. Others may not be quite so.

Boston

Tbh it's a room mate and fuk all business of theres what yo uget up to in your own room. Fair enough they could be pricky about friends you ahve over and the like, but not with you having your boyfriend over. When you're the land lord however there would be an expectation to be told what you're in for, jsut for the shake of keeping a good working relationship

FranknFurter

In most situations where it needs to be made clear, personally I just mention my partner and then say *he* as opposed to *she*, usually people dont give a damn when its a normal part of a normal conversation lol

And, if they *do* you will soon know by how uncomfortable they seem for the rest of the conversation / meeting.

b

Roper

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