Puzzled by a guy's behaviour......

The Clown Man

Dont text tonight.

Text on like friday.

Not tonight. Waaaaayyyyyy to eager. Let it slide so he know's he is lucky to have you text him. He'll probably text you first anyway...

Seriously. Not tonight.

gabgab

He was thinking if I play it cool I can have a shark around for someone else throughout the night :cool: .... If nothing else comes up then he could still fall back on you

Were you real drunk at the party when you met?

Santa Claus

An important thing for all you ladies to remember.
Despite the age of a guy, there is a universal law which dictates that whenever more than 4 guys are in a group together and either alcohol / power tools / sports are involved then the maturity of said group declines in direct proportion to the amount of time spent with alcohol / sport / power tools ...i.e. we revert back to kids !

jcoote

yeah wait a few days thats good advice but whatever u do don't do the 'yeah i'm headin into town tonight' ' oh sorry that wasn't meant for u' thing...just say it out straight

MrPinK

If he hasn't tried to apologise and give you some sort of excuse to explain his actions then he's really not worth contacting again. Be behaved like a complete prick.

Setun

Yall are bein a bit harsh on the chap imo.

Don't worry about it, if he has a good reason, give him a chance and if not, he's an asshole. It's not your loss, it'd be his.

Hank_Scorpio

Don't text him... he's a waste of time! At 28 he should have more sense. I certainly wouldn't do anything like that and I'm only gone 25!!!

Chucky the tree

i have to say i am impressed by this man. I like the way he works. They havent even been on a proper date, yet he has her whipped already. that deserves some respect.

Hank_Scorpio

Whoppa!

Sharza-

Hes either a total git, a very shy easily embarassed type or most likely a bit of a player.

Having read the first page, and most of the second page I was thinking "tenner bets the girl rings him again", click to third page and she says shes thinking of texting him.

This guy is a player, and pulled the old "give her the impression im actually not really interested in her anymore, I prefare hanging with my mates, and i dont really give a crap about her."

And shes lapping it up.

Also note, the more you tell her not to text/ring/meet him again, the more likely she will

Gazza22

Yeah i would go for the player option...

Seriously just stay away from him and go and find somebody else. Though if you think theres a chance of it going anywhere, then go for it but look after yourself.

Maybe he would be different if you tie him down to a few single dates, where it's just the both of you. He may just act differently onfront of his mates. Make sure you play him at his own game, don't be too eager, if he really wants you then he will contact you...

Beruthiel

Sammyjo wrote:

after being listening to what has been said here today...im tempted to text him tonight...

I guess it's true what they say

some of us have to learn the hard way

Sammyjo

ok so was over at one of the girls last nite...we ended up polishing off a bottle of vodka between us.....i texted him. i attempted to be "bright and breezy" and all that and was just like "how are you etc?" got back a non descript reponse.....im doing this and that etc....nothing substantial...why oh why did i text him??

MojoMaker

Because you're emotionally immature and your poor self-image is creating a need that this lad has recognised and is now exploiting.

Talliesin

Sammyjo wrote:

why oh why did i text him??

You hoped we were all wrong. Understandable enough, not a good idea, but understandable.

gabgab

Wow excellent back garden psychology..... Maybe, like everyone to some degree or another, sammy wants what she thinks she cant have,

Sammyjo

eh hang on a second. i definately dont have a poor self image. im a very confident girl who knows that shes good looking (apologies if i sound full of myself, but mojomaker brought the topic up)

im certaintly no minger, and am not emotionally immature...texting him was out of curiosity and drunkenness.....but i would say that the way i handled him the nite of the "date" was definately not immature by any persons definition of the word.

i totally take exception to the fact youre throwing around comments like that when apart from the fact they are incorrect, they are stemming from nothing concrete whatsoever

Sammyjo

by the way that last post was directed at mojomaker......talliesin i would agree with you...not the best move...but hey im sure we've all done it in some way shape or form!!

gabgab

MojoMaker wrote:

Because you're emotionally immature and your poor self-image is creating a need that this lad has recognised and is now exploiting.

Could Mojop Maker be directing?? You know what that is dont you Mojo??

gabgab

Sammyjo wrote:

by the way that last post was directed at mojomaker......talliesin i would agree with you...not the best move...but hey im sure we've all done it in some way shape or form!!

Absolutely, thats what I was saying in my first post...

Beruthiel

Sammyjo wrote:

eh hang on a second. i definately dont have a poor self image.

I see mojo's comment upset you, though I think he may have had a point.
can you tell us yourself why you texted him then?
don't blame the drink, you said earlier on that you were going to

Originally Posted by Sammyjo
im tempted to text him tonight...

Sammyjo

yeah but tbh, i was considering the option of texting him and later on after my post decided "nah im just giving him the benefit of the doubt when he doesnt deserve it"...so i had decided that i wasnt going to until about 11 that night and was like "fcuk it" ill just see what he says if he offers any kind of apology or explanation. i know i cant blame the drink, but half a bottle or so of vodka later...it will make you think a little differently about things!!

gabgab

You cant blame drink but we'v all done it.... scored someone you might'nt of sober, done something you would'nt of if ya had'nt had a loada pints.

In my opinion the longer you keep the thread open, the longer he's on your mind, the longer he's on your mind the more you think about him,etc etc.... its a vicious circle,

skywalker

The simple truth is a lot of women (an increasing number in my experience) love bastards. It gives guys very little incentive to be anything else, & gives the girls loads of ammunition to be overly dramatic.

jcoote

if u want something u want it it can't be helped...maybe sammyjo seen somethin in this guy and wouldn't want to have a 'what if' situation on her hands...fair play sammy at least u are a little bit more in the know now..seems he was a bit of a fool after all

gabgab

I dont disagree with you, in my past I'v found that a lot girls are waay more interested in guys that are'nt that interested in them etc and treat them like crap. But what goes around, comes around eventually....

jcoote

true yeah he'll do what he did to sammy to some battleaxe who will in time tear him a new one and i hope that happens

Sammyjo

yeah totally jcoote. i would have been going what if, but now im not..... i still dont understand, but i just know hes a tosser!!! it is true that when you want something tho you cant help it but well i wont be knowing now.
in my drunken state i was like "well maybe he had a good explanation" but i realise hes just a total loser who doesnt deserve me or any halfway decent girl!!!

SexyGoddess

I cant say i blame you for texting him and look at the good that came out of it!!

Sammyjo wrote:

i realise hes just a total loser who doesnt deserve me or any halfway decent girl!!!

At least now you know and can forget about this loser! Dont put up with crap like that from a guy u deserve more than that!

jcoote

self opinion is a huge part of everyones life and maybe u questioned yours when he showed a lack of enthusiasm..no matter how confident a person is they never want to be rejected even by a prick they hardly know...its just human nature

MojoMaker

OP, if you're so good looking and hence confident in your looks why did you turn all needy and pander to the actions of a bloke clearly not interested in you? Not the actions of a confident person whatsoever.

Easy to mask it as "curiosity" - in fact a standard defence when one fails to recognise & embrace one's own neediness. You have it. Relax, it's not fatal.

Btw - love the excuses ealier, "maybe he's shy", or "scared cos his mates were around" - priceless. Your need met his immaturity and made it briefly seem like it was something else altogether. Have more respect for yourself and don't waste time following the next loser from pub to pub hoping he's "just shy".

Sammyjo

mojomaker youre so far off the mark.

i am a totally confident person, and am not masking what i did with "curiosity" or indeed under any other guise. neediness is not a trait i possess and certaintly not with a guy i barely know.

possibly jcoote and gabgab have a bit of a point tho.....its sometimes what you think you cant have that you want a little more.

but anyways, i texted him, got a response that showed that he was just a tosser and im completely cool about it....imo no harm done...i dont know the guy so im definately not going to lose any sleep over him. the only reason why i started the thread was cos i was genuinely curious......and by curious i dont mean despairing cos of the way he treated me, or being needy or anything else like that.

just curious to see what other peoples opinions on what happened were....

jcoote

i don't think confidence in your looks has anything to do with wanting a relationship...either way people always seem sound when u txt them because they have a minute to think about what they say and don't go blabberin in their usual manner...and i think sammyjo has learned her lesson...hopefully u don't get in this position again!!!

ADUB?

OP could have saved herself the price of that Text and the time, if she'd have bothered to listen to most of the people on page 1 and 2 of this post.

It's not her self-confidence I'd question, its her ability to listen to people's advice.

At 28 he acted like that????? Jesus what a loser, he acted like a 15 year old boy.

Glad to see that you now! finally! regarding him as a complete waste of time and space.

dictatorcat

I was in pretty much the exact same situation for the last two weeks. I've stopped texting him now. I don't think guys like this mean to be tossers, it's just that they don't know what they want hence they don't feel the need to put in any effort. Let him go, he's clearly not ready for any kind of relationship, be it one night or long term.

MojoMaker

MojoMaker wrote:

OP, if you're so good looking and hence confident in your looks why did you turn all needy and pander to the actions of a bloke clearly not interested in you? Not the actions of a confident person whatsoever.

humans are humans sometimes that means bad judgement sometimes that means fancying someone who wont give you what you want in a relationship. if people didnt fancy who isnt good for them the truth is the world would probably stop producing children