need to stop a party

shellby

ok i know this sounds bizzare but my parents went away and left myself and my brother on our own.... for the past week he's been running riot drinking, smoking blow making a mess and shrooms getting in trouble with the gaurds missing work and generally making my life hell
my parents dont see him as responsible so he has been left him in my charge
so i've been running around after him cleaning, cokking, going to the gaurds...blah,blah,blah
then he is ever so bold as to ask can he have a party the answer is no my parents are home in 2 days and i already have enough to explain
now the thing is i have to go out tonight i don't have a choice i know it sound ridiculous but its just one of those things that i can't miss and i've gotten the impression that he is going to go ahead with the party anyway i'm at my wits end i really need advise to stop this

Bluetonic

shellby wrote:

ok i know this sounds bizzare but my parents went away and left myself and my brother on our own.... for the past week he's been running riot drinking, smoking blow making a mess and shrooms getting in trouble with the gaurds missing work and generally making my life hell
my parents dont see him as responsible so he has been left him in my charge
so i've been running around after him cleaning, cokking, going to the gaurds...blah,blah,blah
then he is ever so bold as to ask can he have a party the answer is no my parents are home in 2 days and i already have enough to explain
now the thing is i have to go out tonight i don't have a choice i know it sound ridiculous but its just one of those things that i can't miss and i've gotten the impression that he is going to go ahead with the party anyway i'm at my wits end i really need advise to stop this

What age group are you looking at here?

D

Well if I were you I'd try to lock as many internal doors as possible, like other peoples' rooms and remove anything breakable from those common rooms that you can't lock.

shellby

i'm 20 he's 18 but the maturity difference is vast i no i sound like an awl' one but you would understand if you were in my situation

shellby

D wrote:

Well if I were you I'd try to lock as many internal doors as possible, like other peoples' rooms and remove anything breakable from those common rooms that you can't lock.

that a fantastic idea unfortunitly my parents don't keep keys for internal rooms - the think that its dangerous to lock a room incase anything happens (bar the bathroom)
removing breakables would take hours

GreenHell

The answer clearly is to trip the switches then make like your going to phone a sparky

Mighty_Mouse

then he is ever so bold

!!!
Let him wreck the place. If your parents have balls they'll kick him out.

newgrange

Is there no neighbour or older relative you can get to help out?

Get them to come sit in your house from about eight on, and run anyone who tries to come into the house - including your brother. Let him go stay with one of his friends.
They could always lock the doors from inside, so his key will not work.

Your parents, knowing what he is like, had no business leaving you in charge of him - he is not your responsibility.

And no "Oh but he's only 18, were you not young once?" nonsense. The guy sounds like a menace. Let him spread his particular respect for other people's property and space to his friends houses.

Eye

sounds a bit childish i know but i'm assuming you would'nt be gone all night and you would be back at some point, if so take his key to the house off him and make sure no other spare keys are available to him (from other relatives etc.) and give him €10 and tell him to go to the cinema or something like that. That way he has something to do (sort of) and cant really get back into the house to have said party.

Like i said, childish i know but at short notice i can't think of much else you could try.

Bluetonic

GreenHell wrote:

The answer clearly is to trip the switches then make like your going to phone a sparky

Or take all the fuses out of the fuse board and hide them.

Just be careful doing this.

The other thing is depending on how mature/immature his friends are, you could call around to their parents (as I preusme they are all still living at home) and say that if they could kindly tell there offspring to stay away from your house for the evening as there is no party of any kind going on. Perhaps dropping hints that if they do they most likely will be getting caught up in illegal activities. This of course would really depend the moral standing of the parents.

cregser

You could lock him out off the gaff if you have a porch or second door lock key he doesn't have. You could say they parents are coming back early or say an aunt/uncle said they were coming over.

Or you could have a party! Gate crashers are your main problem. Friends shouldn't be too much trouble. But when friends tell their friends who tell people they work with who tell... you know what I mean?

shellby

i told him i would lock him out and he said that he would put the door in and i believe him my aunt has done her best to help me but she even made him stay in her house for a night but he refused to go back because she gave out to him for not having any respect for the property
i'm going to hide the keys for my dads van, the shed and my motorbike and try and get someone to take the dog for the night- the last time he ahd a party they locked the dog in his kennel blew smoke from their joints into it and kicked the walls

shellby

Mighty_Mouse wrote:

!!!
Let him wreck the place. If your parents have balls they'll kick him out.

i'de love to but me being the responsible party would still be expected to have the place clean when they get home and alot of his friends are underage

newgrange

i told him i would lock him out and he said that he would put the door in and i believe him

That guy sounds like a child. Next time he does anything like that, call the guards and have him arrested.

Really, you are doing him no favours by covering up and letting him away with it.

egan007

Spike his drink?

Zapho

I agree with the idea of hitting the switches in the circuitbreaker. Tell him the power has gone off (assuming he doesn't think to check the circuitbreaker) and he might decide to have his part elsewhere. Either that or steel his keys off him, and lock him out of the house.

Eye

if he was going to kick the door in if you locked him out and you think that he would go ahead with it then i would be thinking along the lines of popping into the local cop-shop and say to them, listen i dont want this party but he is threatening to kick in the door and party anyway. And i'm sure if you mention the fact that there would be joints at said party they may very well be interested and take a trip around that way later in the night to check that everything is ok.

BizzyC

shellby wrote:

i told him i would lock him out and he said that he would put the door in and i believe him my aunt has done her best to help me but she even made him stay in her house for a night but he refused to go back because she gave out to him for not having any respect for the property
i'm going to hide the keys for my dads van, the shed and my motorbike and try and get someone to take the dog for the night- the last time he ahd a party they locked the dog in his kennel blew smoke from their joints into it and kicked the walls

You brother sounds like a total pr*ck in all fairness.
Lock him out. If he kicks the door in, call the gardai and tell them that a group of young lads broke into your home and started a party.
Tell them there's underage drinking and drug abuse going on.

Gardai will arrest the lot, you're parents can come home to bail your brother out.

Eye

knocking off the power is also a good idea too, flick the mains switch off and remove a couple of fuses and keep them with you if you can and if not hide them somewhere you know he will not get them, would be kinda hard to have much of a party without power

Attol

If there will be underage people present then that is perfect. Just call the guards and say you heard of a party going on with underage people at *insert address here*. I was on my way to a party when the host's big brother came along. That's exactly what he did. The place was swarming with guards and anyone who went back near the house got threatened with being arrested. Nobody went near the whole road after that.

damo

ah come on hes your little brother - you gotta beat him to within an inch of his life and promise theres more where that came from if he goes ahead with the damned party

Oriel

Due to your lack of use of the use of the fullstop, I hope you get what you (don't) deserve. :rolleyes:

shellby

Eye wrote:

if he was going to kick the door in if you locked him out and you think that he would go ahead with it then i would be thinking along the lines of popping into the local cop-shop and say to them, listen i dont want this party but he is threatening to kick in the door and party anyway. And i'm sure if you mention the fact that there would be joints at said party they may very well be interested and take a trip around that way later in the night to check that everything is ok.

ye i was thinking about doing something along those lines - i was just worried because he has already been in trouble with the local gaurds this week, normally i would just stay hamoe and deal with it myself but i can't and after two weeks i really don't see why i should have to

shellby

damo wrote:

ah come on hes your little brother - you gotta beat him to within an inch of his life and promise theres more where that came from if he goes ahead with the damned party

afraid not he's just my younger brother he's like a foot and a half taller than me
he'd knock the stuffing outta me

Eye

as was already said your parents should never have put you in the position they did, he sounds like a tool (no offence) so if he screws up and gets in trouble with the cops then that's his problem not yours. he's 18 and i would assume he knows the difference between right and wrong. if he does stupid sh*t he should expect to get into trouble and not be bailed out everytime, that will only make matters worse.

BizzyC

Just ring the gardai. Simple as that.

Tell him, "I've warned the gardai about your party, they're going to keep an eye on the house."

If he gets caught, it's his own fault.

ross_castle

you sound drastic and very desperate.What i reccomend you do is make him a cop of Tea, and put a fourth of a bottle of eye drops in his drink. This will not cause any permanent damage to yur brother. But will give him a unbelivable dose of the runs for the next 24 hours. All he will want to do is spend the next day sitting on the toilet.

Zapho

BizzyC wrote:

Just ring the gardai. Simple as that.

Tell him, "I've warned the gardai about your party, they're going to keep an eye on the house."

If he gets caught, it's his own fault.

Or you could just bluff that you've called the gardai, that might be enough to scare him.

Nevyn

ross_castle that is poisioning him and you many not know what reaction he will
have to it.

Really you are better of using epsom salts or senacot.

shellby

Eye wrote:

as was already said your parents should never have put you in the position they did, he sounds like a tool (no offence) so if he screws up and gets in trouble with the cops then that's his problem not yours. he's 18 and i would assume he knows the difference between right and wrong. if he does stupid sh*t he should expect to get into trouble and not be bailed out everytime, that will only make matters worse.

you know it i know it everyone that has posted knows it
they think that it was alright - nothing i can do about that

i think i will just call the gaurds and ask them to keep an eye on the house i was just worried about getting him in any further trouble with them before my parents come home - because him in trouble means i have to deal with it

oh and by the way he is a tool no offense taken

qz

shellby wrote:

you know it i know it everyone that has posted knows it
they think that it was alright - nothing i can do about that

i think i will just call the gaurds and ask them to keep an eye on the house i was just worried about getting him in any further trouble with them before my parents come home - because him in trouble means i have to deal with it

oh and by the way he is a tool no offense taken

Whatever happens, let us know!

ai ing

Even better if your local cop shop is close enough drop down today and tell them the story. Make sure you tell them about the underage drinking and drugs part.

LegacyUser

Thaed wrote:

ross_castle that is poisioning him and you many not know what reaction he will
have to it.

Really you are better of using epsom salts or senacot.

Do they work as well. DO IT SHELLBY. your brother wont realise youve stoped his party this way

shellby

will do

thanx for all the advice and helping to reinforce my confidence in dealing with the entire thing i really was just a nervous wreck about it

BizzyC

After you tell the cops, make sure you tell your brother too.

Maybe he'll cancel the party, and no-one will get in trouble.

WhiteWashMan

stay in if thats your priority.

Zapho

Yeah, give him a chance to act responsibly.

cregser

Get one of the neighbours to call the guards if you can. I know I wouldn't want to be known for calling the guards on my own family for a house party. But your situation does seem extreme.

I've kinda been ure situation with my little sister who's less crazy and obviously not stronger than me. I've taught her to fear and respect me when I'm pissed off so she knows not to push things and it gives me some chance to talk sense into her. Can you not use the flip-out card on your brother? Like garauntee you will go ****ing mad at him if he messes up.

rainbow kirby

I had to do something similar when my parents went away in July. My little brother (similar ages here too, he's 18 and I'm 21) wanted to have a party when my parents were away. I just said that if he brought anyone/anything into the house I'd call the guards and my parents (who have threatened to kick him out of the house if he trashes it). I *did* agree to him having 3 friends over for some quiet drinks before they went out though.

Zaph0d

shellby wrote:

will do

thanx for all the advice and helping to reinforce my confidence in dealing with the entire thing i really was just a nervous wreck about it

Why do you care whether he has a party? What's the worst that can happen? Lock your own stuff away and head off for the night.

He is an adult and you are behaving like you are his mammy. In return he is behaving like your child. You can't be expected to be in the house 24 hours a day while your parents are away.

Why are you cleaning up after him? Why are you making him meals? I don't get it.

Are you planning to get up really early tomorrow morning and clean up after him? Why bother? Ignore him and get on with your own life.

it's not worth ruining your relationship with your brother over rubbish like this. Have a drink with him but let him know you're not going to mammy him anymore. He'll probably be relieved.

Sometimes women believe that men will starve if they don't feed them. It's touching but it's not true.

BizzyC

Zaph0d wrote:

Why do you care whether he has a party? What's the worst that can happen? Lock your own stuff away and head off for the night.

He is an adult and you are behaving like you are his mammy. In return he is behaving like your child. You can't be expected to be in the house 24 hours a day while your parents are away.

Why are you cleaning up after him? Why are you making him meals? I don't get it.

Are you planning to get up really early tomorrow morning and clean up after him? Why bother? Ignore him and get on with your own life.

it's not worth ruining your relationship with your brother over rubbish like this. Have a drink with him but let him know you're not going to mammy him anymore. He'll probably be relieved.

Sometimes women believe that men will starve if they don't feed them. It's touching but it's not true.

:rolleyes:
If you read the thread you'd see that he'd wreck the house, which she doesn't want to happen..
Her brother is showing her a complete lack of respect, and he knows it too.
I'd give him a beating, but the gardai are the OP's best option.

joe90

Agree with Zaph0d ....

KillerShamrock

Beat him till he can be beat no more would be my course of action. but the gards are always a good choice. let him kick the door in and let your parents see it when they get back. Then they can deal with him. Now you go out enjoy yourself.

Ps. You could always tie him to his bed or a chair before you go out . teach the little b*****ks a lesson.

ferdi

let him have the party.

dramaqueen

I would just call the cops on him.
At the end of the day he is not your responsibility and he sounds like a fu*ker. If he has so little respect for you, then you have none for him.
Dob him in...

Zaph0d

I can't imagine ever calling the police over a dispute with a member of my family. I'd be really upset if they did it to me. Apart from anything else, it's not a crime for an adult to have a party in the house he lives in with his parents while they are away. The police rightly prioritise actual crimes over family tiffs. So don't do it and don't make a false threat.

Why are you anxious over what your brother might do? If he stains the carpet would you feel responsible? Your obvious anxiety is relieving him of the need to feel responsible for his own actions. Until you stop caring, he won't start caring.

The advice in this thread is idiotic. How many people have suggested beating your brother as a means of getting him to comply?

28064212

Zaph0d wrote:

Apart from anything else, it's not a crime for an adult to have a party in the house he lives in with his parents while they are away.

Actually, I'm pretty sure it is, if he does it without their consent. Surely your parents have some form of discipline, why not let them make the threats down the phoneline?

Nevyn

OP Could you go stay in your Aunts until your parents get home ?
It was unreasonible for them to expect you to put yourself at risk or
in physical danger if your brother or his friends react badly with drink taken.

Go there for the weekend let him do what he wants, let him tidy up and
let him take full responsiblty for his actions and what he allows to happen.

Talliesin

Yep, let him make his bed and then let him lie in it.

Redrocket

take the fuse out from where the esb comes in, or take all the lightbulbs out of the house

Pyschopath666

I think you should let him dig his own grave...

I had a house-party once and never again maybe he needs to learn that there wont always be someone to clean up after him....