Irish Homecoming

vorbis · 26-09-2005 3:37pm #1

An Irish daughter had not been to the house for over 5 years.

Upon her return, her father cussed her; "Where d'hell have ye been all

this time, you ingrate! Why didn't you write us, not even a line to let

us know how you were doing? Why didn't you call? You little tramp!

Don't you know what you put yer Ma through??!!"

The girl, crying, replied, "Sniff, sniff... Da... I became a

prostitute..."

"WHAT!!? Out of here, you shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a disgrace to

this family - I don't ever want to see you again!"

"OK, Dad - as you wish. I just came back to give Ma this luxury fur

coat, title deeds to a ten bed-roomed mansion, plus a savings account

certificate for 5 million euro. For my little brother, this gold Rolex,

and for you Da, the spanking new Mercedes limited edition convertible

that's parked outside plus a lifetime membership to the Country

Club...(takes a breath)...an invitation for you all to spend New Years'

Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera, and...."

"Now what was it you said you had become?"

Girl, crying again, "Sniff, sniff... A prostitute Dad! ... Sniff,

sniff"

"BeJayzus! - you scared me half to death, girl! I thought You said "a

Protestant". Come here and give yer ole da a hug!"