Should I tell him?

LegacyUser · 02-10-2005 7:56pm #1

I've been going out with a guy for a few weeks now, and I really really like him. We were friends before we started going out so we have a good basis for our relationship. I'm away from home at the moment and when I get back, I really want to sleep with him. I'm 18 and he's a couple of years older. The thing is, i'm a virgin. Now, I'm sure I want to sleep with him, so that doesn't need to be discussed, but should I tell him that I'm a virgin? And if I should, when should I do it? Soon, so he has time to get used to the idea, or wait until I see him? Or should I just not mention it?

AARRRGH · 03-10-2005 1:26am

Tell him you're a virgin. Worst case scenario, he gets a boner.

Seriously, I've been there!

Stop worrying

20 Times 20 Times · 03-10-2005 1:31am

He will love it beleive me , the thoughts of you not been with anyone before him , will do loads for his ego .

cregser · 03-10-2005 1:45am

dublindude wrote:

Worst case scenario, he gets a boner.

lol, so true

_Turismo4 · 03-10-2005 2:11am

Best to be honest, and say it, or it will wrack your head..
You’ll have nothing to worry about..

Gazza22 · 03-10-2005 2:21am

Yeah just come out with it. It no big deal and he will appreciate you being honest. The propect of your virginity might excite him too

Laguna · 03-10-2005 2:22am

Is it really an issue if you're a virgin?. Let's face it, your fear is that he'll be pissed off/reject you if you're a virgin, if he is pissed off/upset you're a virgin after he finds out, he's immature and you'll have found this out. Why do you honestly think being a virgin would be a problem?, do you think he'd rather you'd have slept with 30/40 men?

Khannie · 03-10-2005 8:25am

dublindude wrote:

Worst case scenario, he gets a boner.

HAHA. +1 vote for this being true.

g'em · 03-10-2005 10:19am

tell him. he'll appreciate the honesty. Even better, he'll know you have no-one to compare him with, he'll love it.

Have fun

Dave · 03-10-2005 10:45am

Yeah I can't see this being a problem somehow.

LegacyUser · 08-10-2005 5:10pm

Thanks for the replies! I'm gonna tell him, but how soon should I do it? I won't be home for another 10 days or so.

Faye · 09-10-2005 2:37pm

I agree that you should tell him. If it were me though, I would wait until we met face to face and I knew for certain that I still felt the same about wanting to sleep with him. Sometimes we are forced into situations by our earlier actions and our judgment, on the night so to speak, can be come clouded. Take your time, if you still feel the same when you two meet in 10 days then that will be time enough for you to share what you feel comfortable with.

For a woman, sleeping with a man for the first time can be, though not always, very emotional and involved. We may have pre-conceived notions of what it should be like and for many of us sharing our body comes hand and hand with sharing our heart. If you trust this man and you feel safe and comfortable with him then things will work out grand.

Femelade · 09-10-2005 2:55pm

i see no reason not to tell him, but wait till you see him to say it to him, its not the kinda thing you want to tell someone via text or phone call, think you'd like to see his reaction when you say it.

best of luck

-Femmy

LegacyUser · 09-10-2005 4:32pm

I think you're right. Cheers!

Illegal Alien · 10-10-2005 4:39am

Dump him and give me your phone number.

Beruthiel · 10-10-2005 8:46am

Illegal Alien wrote:

Dump him and give me your phone number.

one more comment like that and you're banned
read this forums charter
B

Illegal Alien · 10-10-2005 10:06am

Beruthiel wrote:

one more comment like that and you're banned
read this forums charter
B

Sorry

ianmc38 · 10-10-2005 10:11am

Tell him so he can prepare by getting a large amount of lube, so that you don't shup up shop like a hungry clam after 20 minutes.

Sifo · 10-10-2005 10:19am

tell him when the MOMENT arrives, if he's considerate he'll take it easy and try to make it as enjoyable as possible for you..
the other option is to tell him sooner and give him time to prepare something special... you only lose it once so it should mean everything...

yes, i'm a sentimental old fool... :rolleyes:

good luck

BaZmO* · 10-10-2005 3:39pm

Tbh, you should only tell him if "you" want to tell him. You are not obliged to tell, much in the same way other people aren't obliged to tell their latest fling how many people they have slept with in the past.

Although telling him will take some of the pressure off yourself as you won't feel the burden that you have to perform.

But I honestly think you are worrying about nothing. He most definitely won't think any less of you for being a virgin, on the contrary. When you do tell him just make sure it's not by text. Just tell him when the 2 of you are together.

B.

KillerShamrock · 10-10-2005 4:01pm

Tell him quite literally Just before you do the dirty deed/just after the foreplay. Cause that way you know your definitely be ready and he hasn't tried to push you to do anything.

And if hes a good bloke will go gentle wit you and take time and make it a worth while and very sensual experience.

Cause you tell him before you want to have sex, he will want it quicker and try and push you into it. He will see you as clay ready to be molded into wat ever he likes.

Ps do it sober first time you wont regret it, you only loose your virginity once

Should I tell him?

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