Soulmates

LegacyUser

Do you believe in Soulmates?

My partner recently broke up with me (long term relationship) and I feel like this person was the One, a soulmate.

Am very confused. This runs through my head all the time - what if he was the One and now hes gone? Am late twenties. I cant go though the rest of my life on "what ifs" but it so damn hard to reason.

katiegordon

Did you feel like he wasyour soulmate when you were together??
In my experience absence makes the heart grow fonder..........

jrey1981

Yeah I had this too...who knows? Maybe he was and maybe he wasnt.

The real problem here is that the idea of soulmates and "the one" affects our thinking, creating doubt and fear that we have lost "the one" as much as it creates hope for those people still hoping to meet "the one".

The likelihood, and more logical thinking would tend to favour a number of people who might be soulmates...but you are only going to encounter them if you socialise in the right places.

At least thats what I try to tell myself anyway...! Sorry I cannot be more helpful, but this is my perspective anyway - sometimes it inspires hope and other times it doesnt.

Laguna

I don't personally believe in soulmates, the fact that our genetics are 99.7% similar to each other indicates, in my opinion, that you are compatible with a large number of other people in the world. Not to forget the fact using the term soulmates inclines one to believe in "souls" and therefore spirituality which I think is total bull****.

Maybe I'm wrong, who knows?, maybe your guy was your "one"... I just don't believe in it.... possibly explaining why I'm single :rolleyes:

kaimera

interesting, was watching Scrubs tonight and JD and Elliot were together [again] but JD found himself not in love with her anymore. He was going to stay with her regardless because it felt right.

relationships are about the little things that make it the way it is and something [obviously] changed with your partner.

Soulmates. Yes I believe , but they don't fall from trees and can't be bought and/or bartered with lettuce.

Scarinae

I don't believe in soulmates exactly - I mean, what if your one true love happened to live in South America and you're in Europe, your paths aren't exactly likely to cross and it would lead to a lot of disillusioned people in unhappy marriges if this was the case. Or worse, what if your one true love lived in the 17th century? Now that's unaccessible. I think that there are probably a large number of people in the world who you are super compatible with, you just haven't met them/seen them in that way. This will be no comfort to you right now of course. I know that when you've recently come out of a long term relationship it's easy to feel lost, because apart from the habits you'd settled into with that person and the way that everywhere you go and everything you see seems to be connected with some nostalgic memory you have of your relationship, you probably cannot remember what it felt like to be single and happy because it was so long ago. However, if you broke up then the chances are that something wasn't right in the relationship. I don't know which one of you broke it off, but there must have been some reason that things just weren't right, and one of you felt that it couldn't go on any longer. If it was them that called things to a halt, it would be easy to blame yourself and wonder if you'd done something different would they still be with you - don't think like that, it's usually two-sided, be grateful that they were honest with you. If it was that broke it off, you may be wondering if you made a huge mistake and if you should try to patch things up - follow your gut instinct on this one, but remember that they may be feeling hurt and upset by the situation as well. If you don't get back together, it will be very difficult for a while but you will get through it. Don't jump into a new relatinship - rebounds are awful. Instead, spend more time with your friends and enjoy their company, try to get more comfortable with youself, spend some time indulging in things that you like doing. Yo don't have to be defined by another person. Sorry if I'm being really waffly here, I don't mean to be

Supercell

Breaking up with someone like this is really had to adjust to.

Try to rationalise it, If he was a soul mate..then he would be still here, he is not...so he didnt feel that you are his soul mate, you might feel that there is noone else..there is..the world is too big not to find some that loves YOU back..

If he was your soul mate (whatever that means) you would have married him after a couple of weeks (or discussed it) and he would be phoning you (six months into your relationship) at random times to tell you he missed you and you would do the same.

I bet this didnt happen..soul mates are rare..be calm ..cry a bit if that helps get it out of the system..but dont forget..there are plenty of people out there that might be more appeciative and loving to you..but they wont be knocking on your door..you have to go out there and find them in the disco's the night classes or whatever social gathering that helps you meet your real soul mate

Good luck , there is plenty of nice people out there, you just need to go out there and meet them!!

Zombrex

Smate wrote:

Do you believe in Soulmates?

My partner recently broke up with me (long term relationship) and I feel like this person was the One, a soulmate.

Am very confused. This runs through my head all the time - what if he was the One and now hes gone? Am late twenties. I cant go though the rest of my life on "what ifs" but it so damn hard to reason.

Not to point out the obvious, but if he was your "soul mate" then surely he wouldn't have broken up with you ... you obviously weren't his

How many breakups have you had in your life my i ask? ... It's very common after a breakup to imagine you will never find someone that makes you happy ever again, but experience teaches us that that is simply not true, you just need time to get over him and then move on

Zillah

Smate wrote:

Do you believe in Soulmates?

As in, theres only one person with whom you would ever truly match and be happy? No.

My partner recently broke up with me (long term relationship) and I feel like this person was the One, a soulmate.

Thats because they were what some would call your "soulmate". That doesnt neccessarily mean that theyre the only one who would count as such.

Am very confused. This runs through my head all the time - what if he was the One and now hes gone? Am late twenties. I cant go though the rest of my life on "what ifs" but it so damn hard to reason.

If you're very unlucky that may be what happens. If your lucky you'll meet someone that you will love just as much. Or more. Or better. Or different. So much so that it makes what you felt before look like childish nonsense.

If you're still concerned put it this way. If you broke up then clearly he wasn't the one? Meaning that if there is only one then he's still out there.

hewk

The best thing to do is forget about it or youll end up like a constipated greyhound

1

hewk wrote:

The best thing to do is forget about it or youll end up like a constipated greyhound

:eek:

Dilbert75

Everything will be alright in the end. If its not alright, its not the end.

jellie

the idea of soulmates is nice, but in reality it seems unlikely. id still like to believe its true though..

but if you do believe in the idea of soulmates, then you probably believe in fate etc. so if thats the case then this relationship just wasnt meant to be, and in time youll realise this and hopefully find someone new.