Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

In need of advice.

Options
  • 02-11-2005 8:12pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I'm really struggling to define myself and I'm not sure where to go.

    I'm a girl in my early twenties, and while I've gone out with guys I've always freaked out and shied away from anything that got in any way serious. I enjoy hanging out with guys, but the only intense attractions I've ever felt have always been toward women, usually those slighlty older than me.

    I've been grappling with this for awhile now, and I'm fairly certain that the attraction I've always felt towards women isn't going to go away. On the other hand, I've never been with a woman, so I don't know that I wouldn't freak out over intimacy in a same sex relationship the same way I do with guys.

    I don't know what to even tell myself I am - gay? bi? simply sexually immature? There's literally nobody I can talk to about this. The idea of even broaching this subject with any of my friends or family is just too awful a concept to even consider. I *know* it would cause irreperable weirdness.

    Does anyone have any advice perhaps for some sites, groups or forums that might help me sort out who the hell I am?

    Sorry for treating this group like an agony aunt page, I just didn't know where else to go.


Comments

  • Options
    #2
    shinners007
    Closed Accounts Posts: 727 ✭✭✭shinners007


    hi im a straight girl aged 20 i was unsure about my sexuality for years. a college frriend told me she was bi and it didnt help my uncertainty about my sexuality. anyhow she tried 2kiss me one ngt and i freaked out i realised i was straight. im now in a serious relationship 4three years and im very happy and sure about myself. i think everyone is unsure at some stage in their life.
    i say try it out then knock it back or accept it. you wont no till youve tryed it!!!!
    u may just have commitment issues or a fear of intamcythat prvents u goin one step further or ul no urself wat u are wen u unerstand ur self completely
    not sure if im helping ya but im here if ever ya want to chat:)


  • Options
    #3
    dory
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators Posts: 4,501 Mod ✭✭✭✭dory


    :eek: Wow! It's like reading my own story! Im exactly the same. Only ever gone out with guys but all my major crushes have been with girls, and ones slightly older than me!!
    The only difference is a few weeks ago I kissed a girl for the first time in a club. It was fun, but afterwards I was thinking as it wasn't mind blowingly amazing, maybe Im straight. But I think it was because it was just with a random girl, not one I liked beforehand.
    The only advice I can give you is relax, don't label yourself (yet!), and go out with whoever you fancy at the time.
    I hope you get some peoper answers here, so I'll get one too!:)


  • Options
    #4
    Goodshape
    Registered Users Posts: 8,488 ✭✭✭Goodshape


    dory wrote:
    The only advice I can give you is relax, don't label yourself (yet!), and go out with whoever you fancy at the time.
    This sounds like good advice to me. The only people who will seriously begrudge you for doing this are narrow-minded fools who's opinion you shouldn't value in the first place.

    Do what you feel you want to do; you don't have to make the 'right' choices a hundred precent of the time but if you choose to limit yourself now, you'll always be left wondering. You don't learn anything by doing nothing. You've only got one life to live.. make the most of it.

    And good luck with whatever (and whoever) you end up with :)


Advertisement