Stressed out and cant get out of it. Desperate.

LegacyUser

I have been working for myself for over a year and have numerous clients. In the last 3 months I have gradually began to hate what im doing more and more to the point now that when I come in I never do anything. I spend the whole day surfing the net. Clients ring me and I put them off or just do a tiny bit to make it look like im doing something, but I find it so difficult to actually do it, simply because I am completely demotivated and I simply hate doing it. I got very stressed about a month or two ago with deadlines and since then I have not really recovered. I had to take tablets for stress and all that stuff.

I decided recently that I was going to give up what I was doing but that I would need to finish the jobs I had on first. That was a a good while ago, about a month and a half. Since then ive done frig all. I cant bring myself to do it. I really dont want to do it. Can I just do a runner, go low profile. I haven't a clue what to do, im still really stressed. I can't face this mountain. Isn't health most important? Aaaaaaaaaaaah.

0utshined

Starting up and running your own business can be incredibly stressful. Have you taken a break at all since you started? Even a 3-4 day trip somewhere can really help you unwind.

Depending on what the work is, is it possible to outsource some of it to someone else? Think carefully before you jack it in.

shakaman

If there isn't any clause in contracts signed with clients then check with your solicitor and if he gives the nod, do one.

If not I suggest pulling the finger out and getting it over with, how long are the jobs in question....surely no more than a couple of months graft?

Can we ask what you currently work at?

txt_mess

Assuming your not in major debt and it is just simply a case of outstanding work needing to be done your not in too bad a situation. Everyone gets bored and demotivated from a job luckily I work for a big company so when I get bored I can move around to different positions.

I think your motivation should be to walk away from this with a clear conscious to do that I would try and push yourself to finish what you have left explain to your clients that you are leaving the business but there current work will be done most will understand it also leaves the way open if you need to get back into it as there will be no bad history.

Then I say ( if you can afford it ) book a holiday clear you head and let the stress go.

LegacyUser

Im quite young and fell into working for myself merely by accident. So I had nothing planned or anything. I wouldn't call it a business, merely freelancing. No clause or contracts etc. Its computer based work. One of the jobs involves extensive research on my behalf seen as I haven't done a job like this before. It would mean quite a lot of learning etc.

How can you learn new stuff etc. when you
1. Hate it
2. Are stressed out completely.

And to be honest, part of the problem is that I haven't taken time off in ages but taking time off definitely wouldn't evoke interest in it again.

I simply hate it.

txt_mess

Ah computers how I love them , if its freelance support and there are not contracts just explaining to your clients that it's not financially viable for you and your moving on everyone in IT has heard that reason before.

As for the big project if you have already committed to it they maybe pissed if you back out but if you only said you'd take a look and haven't been paid just go back and explain calmly that unfortunately your not in a position to take that large a piece of work and you don't have the necessary skills. Most companies / people appreciate a bit of honesty and the fact that your not wasting their time.

seamus

If you have a good bit of work on, you may consider "selling" your contracts to other companies/freelancers.

Basically this would involve supervising the transfer of the contract to the other party, in exchange for a certain small percentage of the cost of finishing the project. The client may not have a problem with this, provided that the cost of the project doesn't change much, and the other party are reliable. It means that the client doesn't have to go finding another company to finish your work, which would end up costing them much more.

The benefit that you get is that you get rid of your outstanding work without having to finish it, but still get some money for what you've done thus far and to tide you over until you figure yourself out.

The problem with this is finding a company willing to take the projects and seeing it through.

Nuttzz

Try taking a break for a few days and completely change your routine, if you still feel the same afterward Seamus's advice means that you have made a few quid for yourself and havent left your clients in the lurch

AARRRGH

ihatemyjob wrote:

I have been working for myself for over a year and have numerous clients. In the last 3 months I have gradually began to hate what im doing more and more to the point now that when I come in I never do anything. I spend the whole day surfing the net. Clients ring me and I put them off or just do a tiny bit to make it look like im doing something, but I find it so difficult to actually do it, simply because I am completely demotivated and I simply hate doing it. I got very stressed about a month or two ago with deadlines and since then I have not really recovered. I had to take tablets for stress and all that stuff.

I know exactly what you mean. I'm involved in a business myself and I frequently feel the same as you.

What I've found is the more I put things off/surf the net/etc. the more demotivated I get. I find it's a vicious circle: not doing the work makes me even less likely to do the work in the future...

BUT when I decide (like yesterday and today for example) to go head first into the work and try to do as much as possible, it cheers me up and I surprise myself by how much work I can get done. And it makes me realise I don't hate it as much as I think I do.

If I were you I'd give your company/freelancing one more go. Do the work and see how it makes you feel. You never know, if you leave it all behind and take a desk job, you'll be wondering what the problem was... you know, no boss, no hours etc etc etc.!

LegacyUser

Sorry for your troubles.We have all been in jobs we hate, out of necessity.See it as a phase you will go through that is ending soon.If those tablets worked then keep taking them until you feel you can cope.Get those final projects tied up.The sooner you have them done, the sooner you will be free.Plan an adventure for next year, some time abroad with your mates.Its easy to convince yourself that you cannot cope.I bet you will find it in yourself to finish those projects. You know you can do it.Set out a daily planner of the little tasks you must get through. Give yourself a date to have everything wrapped up.GO FOR IT!Everything will be fine a few months down the line.Planning the next journey after you have completed this phase should get you through.

ando

ihatemyjob wrote:

I simply hate it.

then simply quit and do something else. Your health mental aswell as physical comes first. If you hate it, quit it. Just do it