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The athesist & the taxi man

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  • 04-10-2001 6:08pm
    #1
    Praetorian
    Registered Users Posts: 3,711 ✭✭✭


    The Atheist

    An atheist was taking a walk through the woods, admiring all that
    the "accident of evolution" had created. "What majestic trees! What
    powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!" he said to himself.
    As he was walking alongside the river he heard a rustling
    in the bushes behind him. He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot
    grizzly charge towards him. He ran as fast as he could up the path. He
    looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was closing. He ran
    even faster, so scared that tears were coming to his eyes. He
    looked over his shoulder again, and the bear was even closer. His heart
    was
    pumping
    frantically and he tried to run even faster. He tripped and fell to the
    ground.
    He rolled over to pick himself up but saw the bear, right on
    top of him: reaching for him with his left paw and raising his right
    paw to strike him.
    At that instant the atheist cried out "Oh my God!...."
    Time stopped.
    The bear froze.
    The forest was silent.
    Even the river stopped moving.
    As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of
    the sky: "You deny my existence for all of these years;
    teach others I don't exist; and, even credit creation to a
    cosmic accident. Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament?
    Am I to count you as a believer?"
    The atheist looked directly into the light: "It would be
    hypocritical of me to suddenly ask You to treat me as a Christian now,
    but
    perhaps could you make the bear a Christian?" "Very well," the voice
    said.

    The light went out. The river ran again. And the sounds of the forest
    resumed.

    And then the bear dropped its right paw ........ brought
    both paws together .... bowed its head and spoke: "Lord,
    for this food which I am about to receive, I am truly thankful."

    The Taxi Driver

    A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him
    something. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went
    up on the footpath, and stopped centimetres from a shop window.
    For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said
    "Look mate, don't ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!"
    The passenger apologised and said he didn't realise that a little
    tap could scare him so much. The driver replied "Sorry, it's not really your fault. Today is my
    first day as a cab driver - I've been driving hearses for the last 25 years."


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