what would YOU do

GoneShootin

The wife came home just in time to find her
husband in bed with another
woman. With super-human strength borne of fury,
she dragged him down the
stairs,out the back door, and into the tool shed
in the back yard and
put his pen*s in a vice. She then secured it
tightly and removed the handle.
Next she picked up a hacksaw.
The husband was terrified, and screamed,

"Stop! Stop! You're not going to

"The wife, with a gleam of revenge in her eye put
the saw in her husband's hand and said

"Nope. I'm going to set the shed on fire. You do
whatever you have to."

Baz_

truly wickedly funny

Pugsley

ROFL BRILLIANT!!!

Spunog UIE

brillant stuff, but i'm scared...misery...EVIL MISERY...i know that woman!

Vikktakkht

n1, rofl.... I think my mate is married to her....

Lump

I think I'd hacksaw the vice away............. Wouldn't that be the clever thing to do??



John

GoneShootin

i thought of that too, but i dont know of any hacksaw blade that will get through a vice !!

Monkey

Well hacksaws are designed to cut metal so I suppose it would work, she should hand him a knife.

If I knew it wouldn't cut through the vice, I'd smash it inot the cow's face before she got a chance to set the shed on fire.

Though she'd hardly be able to put a penis in a vice without doing some serious damge to it.

Baz_

why are you people discussing this, and actually making me visualise the process. Stop it, Stop it now.

GoneShootin

trouble with the hacksaw blade is that the teeth will wear away and become too smooth to go thru the vice, as it is made from hardened cast iron

i know you see, for its what you MIGHT do IF you were in leaving cert engineering and bored

Twilight Dawn

Run out of the shed carrying the vice with you?

Spunog UIE

nah tis bolted down.

just leave it go and hope ya haven't done too much bad stuff in your life...

OSiriS

well personally I'd remove the blade, and use the handle to unscrew the vice, since most hack-saw handles I know would fit through most vices I know ... but then again personally I would never get in that situation:P

rumpelstiltskin

Well, what is the vice bolted onto?
Usually it would be some kind of wooden worktop, in which case, you could easily saw through the table with the hacksaw, then leave carrying the vice.
Is there any neighbours nearby? If there are mobile neighbours next door, I might risk throwing the saw through a window (if there is one) to attract their attention.
If there was a nearby spade, you could cut the end of it into a sharp point with the saw, then spear the wife before she had a chance to light the match.
I would also try pouring some kind of lubricant into the vice in the hopes that I could somehow free myself.
Failing all these options, I would simply have to saw my own member off, and then run outside and brutally torture my wife for several days, then skin her and eat her flesh.

Dave

GoneShootin

you have alot of time on your hands dont ya dave

rumpelstiltskin

Well, at least I'll be prepared in case it happens.