Language Standards

po0k

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German, which was the other possibiltiy.
As part of the negociations, Her Majesty's government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement, and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would be known as "EuroEnglish".
In the first year, "s" will be replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favor of the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replased with the "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.
In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate spelling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful, and they should go away.
By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z", and "w" with "v". During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou", and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.
After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi ti understand ech ozer.

ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!!!
And zen ve wil take over ze VORLD!!!

Doc

Old but nice;)

Bard

Zat is old but gut. Vel don.

Vikktakkht

never seen that one before... nice 1

Pugsley

klasik

mike65

Nice One

I knew was a spoof though, as there was no mention of French.
The Elysse Palace and the parliment break out in hives at the thought of either English or German becoming the official
lauguage of Europe!