One for Animal Lovers (ie not me)

Clinical Waste

Dat's Dem

Two Irishmen walk into a pet shop. Right away they go to the bird section
and Mick says to Paddy; "Dat's Dem".
The shopkeeper comes over and asks if he can help.
"Yeah, we'll take four of dem dere budgies in dat cage op dere", says Mick.
"Put dem in a pepper bag".

The shopkeeper does as asked and the two pay for the birds and leave.
They get into Mick's van and drive until they reach a cliff with a 500ft drop.
"Dis looks loike a grand place", says Mick. He then takes the two birds
out of the bag, places them on his shoulders and jumps off the cliff.

Paddy watches as his mate drops off the edge and goes straight down for
a few seconds followed by a 'Splat'.
As Paddy looks over the edge of the cliff he shakes his head and says
"Fock Dat, dis budgie jumpin' is too fockin dangerous for me..."

Part Two

A few minutes later, Seamus approaches. He too has been to the pet shop
and his carrying the familiar 'pepper bag'. He then pulls a parrot out of the
bag and Paddy notices that in the other hand Seamus is carrying a gun.
"Watch this Paddy" he says, as he launches himself over the edge of the cliff.
Paddy watches as half way down Seamus takes the gun and blows the parrot's head off.
Seamus continues to plummet until there is another 'Splat' and he joins
Mick at the bottom of the cliff.
Paddy shakes his head and says, "An' oim never troyin' that parrotshooting noider..."

Part Three

After a few minutes, Sean strolls up. He too has been to the pet shop and walks
up with his 'pepper bag'. Instead of a parrot he pulls a chicken out of the
bag and launches himself off the cliff with the usual result.
Once more Paddy shakes his head - "Fock me Sean, first der was Mick wit his
budgie jumpin, den Seamus parrotshooting....

and now you fockin' hen gliding....."

BioHazRd

Oldie but goodie
You're spending too much time in that dark room of yours m8