WWW = Wretched Writers Welcome

Bard

Since 1982 the English Department at San Jose State University has sponsored the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest, a whimsical literary competition that challenges entrants to compose the opening sentence to the worst of all possible novels. The contest (hereafter referred to as the BLFC) was the brainchild (or Rosemary's baby) of Professor Scott Rice, whose graduate school excavations unearthed the source of the line "It was a dark and stormy night." Sentenced to write a seminar paper on a minor Victorian novelist, he chose the man with the funny hyphenated name, Edward George Bulwer-Lytton, who was best known for perpetrating The Last Days of Pompeii, Eugene Aram, Rienzi, The Caxtons, The Coming Race, and--not least--Paul Clifford, whose famous opener has been plagiarized repeatedly by the cartoon beagle Snoopy.

Conscripted numerous times to be a judge in writing contests that were, in effect, bad writing contests but with prolix, overlong, and generally lengthy submissions, he struck upon the idea of holding a competition that would be honest and--best of all--invite brief entries. Furthermore, it had the ancillary advantage of one day allowing him to write about himself in the third person.

Continued at... http://www.bulwer-lytton.com/

The Sweeper

I reckon my submission for the 'best opening line in a terrible novel' would be...

"Belinda flicked her hair nervously, rubbing one perfectly manicured fingernail along her porcelain-skinned collarbone as she waited for Dace DiMaggio to arrive."

Samson

We had such fun, that spring, but, at a terrible price...

MarcusGarvey

The End.

DonMiguel

Nothing ever happened in Bill's life and nothing ever would: everyone agrees he is the world's most boring man but nevertheless as his friend I feel I need to tell his story.

Clintons Cat

From the upcoming novel. The Mysterious Yellow Thing.
Publisher TBA

"I never knew what it was about the colour yellow that excited me so,until that fateful day in reno..."

Shad0r

Originally posted by DonMiguel
Nothing ever happened in Bill's life and nothing ever would: everyone agrees he is the world's most boring man but nevertheless as his friend I feel I need to tell his story.

LOL

Kolodny

"Ace, watch your head!" hissed Wanda urgently, yet somehow provocatively, through red, full, sensuous lips, but he couldn't you know, since nobody can actually watch more than part of his nose or a little cheek or lips if he really tries, but he appreciated her warning.

Classic stuff!