Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

american films and tv

Options
  • 31-01-2002 1:34pm
    #1
    ayatollah
    Registered Users Posts: 1,234 ✭✭✭


    Things we have learned from current movies



    1. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing device that have large red readouts telling when they are going to go off.
    2. During all police investigations, it will be necessary to visit a strip joint at least once.
    3. Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A good German accent will do.
    4. If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises while wearing their most revealing underwear.
    5. When confronted by an evil international terrorist, sarcasm and wisecracks are your best weapons.
    6. One man shooting at 20 men has la better chance of killing them than 20 men firing one man, if he is the hero.
    7. Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication system of any invading alien civilization.
    8. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts-your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one.


Comments

  • Options
    #2
    ayatollah
    Registered Users Posts: 1,234 ✭✭✭ayatollah


    Fall TV Season Line-Up

    NBC
    8:00 Friends
    8:30 Girlfriends
    9:00 One Guy with Several Female Friends
    9:30 My Gay Friends
    10:00 Friends You Wish You Had But Don't

    FOX
    8:00 Real Humans in Real Pain
    8:30 Feral Dingoes Eating People on Tape
    9:00 Jiggle It Beach
    9:30 LA Chicks
    10:00 Beverly Hills 90210: The 90,210th Episode

    UPN
    8:00 The Unwatchables
    8:30 Voyage To The Bottom Of The Ratings
    9:00 Theoretically Existing Show
    9:30 Praying For Syndication
    10:00 The Last Thing You'd Ever Want To Sit Through

    WB
    8:00 Where My Wife At?
    8:30 Gittin' Yo Freak On
    9:00 Me & My Psychic
    9:30 Kids Suck The Darndest Things
    10:00 Dawson's Clothes

    PUBLIC ACCESS
    8:00 Blurry Steve
    8:30 Inaudible City Council Meeting
    9:00 Do We Have A Caller On The Line? Hello?
    9:30 The Best Of Lunch Menus
    10:00 My Friend Made This Short Film
    10:30 Men With Braids Speak Out

    E!
    8:00 Andy Gibb: A Nightmare Descent Into Booze & Pills
    8:30 John Belushi: A Nightmare Descent Into Booze & Pills
    9:00 Margot Kidder: A Nightmare Descent Into Booze &Pills
    9:30 River Phoenix: A Nightmare Descent Into Booze &Pills
    10:00 Boy George: A Nightmare Descent Into Booze & Pills

    ESPN2
    8:00 Finland's Brutalest Men
    8:30 Being Hit By A Trolley Regional Semifinals
    9:00 60 Minutes Of Joe Theismann's Leg Breaking
    10:00 Coed Spread-Eagled Weight-Training From Maui

    LIFETIME
    8:00 How Can I Choose Between My Daughters?
    9:00 The Abused Wife Who Didn't Mean To Kill Her
    Policeman Husband in Self-Defense
    10:00 The Boy Whose Mommy Watched Far Too Much Television

    TNN
    8:00 Well, I'll Be Dipped in Pigturd!
    8:30 Roadkill Recipe to Warm the Cockles of Your Heart
    9:00 You Hush Up, Wanda Mae
    9:30 Sheeeeeeee-ewt!
    10:00 Hold 'Er Down While I Get the Rifle From the Truck

    TELEMUNDO
    8:00 Roberto Amorosa en Agua Caliente!
    9:00 Whoomp! Donde Esta?
    9:30 Gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooal!
    10:00 Ai! Ai! Ai! Ai! Ai!
    10:30 La Hora de Goya

    CINEMAX
    8:00 Bare Ambition (Tanya Roberts)
    8:30 Naked Exposition (Traci Lords)
    9:00 Body Of Nudity (Dana Plato)
    10:00 Unclothed Anguish (Joyce DeWitt)


Advertisement