sexuality

sisob · 04-02-2002 9:54pm #1

before I ask the question that I want to ask I need to know if this sort of discussion is "allowed" by our most holy moderators.

I think it would be a fun discussion

Crash · 04-02-2002 10:08pm

How have you managed to have soooo many sex-related topics at the same time??

smiles · 04-02-2002 10:25pm

Well i cant see any problem with it, in fact there was the suggestion on Admin that a Gay Board be created and the only reason it was declined was because it was unneeded, people could talk about it in other forums as they see fit.

Now... whats the question? :P

<< Fio >>

Victor · 05-02-2002 2:41pm

If you approach it in a mature, respectful way, that is unlikely to be spammed and you aren't inappropraitely graphic or expicit (remember lots of 'kiddies' can see this site), there shouldn't be a huge problem.

Clinical Waste · 05-02-2002 2:46pm

....and if you don't do it on any of Monty's boards.

Asuka · 05-02-2002 5:31pm

Hehe. Keep it mature and reasonable, thats all.

And watch for this card...

A

Crash · 05-02-2002 7:00pm

Who designed that card?

Cus they cant speel their properly.
Dang Stoopid Headz.

Victor · 05-02-2002 7:03pm

So what did you want to discuss anyway?

sisob · 05-02-2002 8:33pm

well my origional idea came from a from a conversation that I had with my step-mum.

She said that while men are in their sexual prime in their teens - women are in their sexual prime in their 30's. and she wasnt talking about fertility, she was talking about enjoying sex. She also said that teenage girls either generally have sex because of peer pressure or because of the power it gives them. She actually finds it hard to believe that any teenage girls enjoy sex.

I'm curious about all you people think

scuzzy · 05-02-2002 8:47pm

She said that while men are in their sexual prime in their teens - women are in their sexual prime in their 30's. and she wasnt talking about fertility, she was talking about enjoying sex.

Eh... men enjoy sex whatever their age...

Raggamuffin · 05-02-2002 8:48pm

i dunno i guess if you actually really like someone you'll just enoj it anyways

Victor · 05-02-2002 9:16pm

Yes, there is some theoretically ideal scenario with an 18 years old guy and a 28 year old woman. Of course, this is hardly of much use with your chosen partner, who may be older or younger and may react differently, which would be quite normal. It's about being comfortable with your partner and with who you are.

Often a person's enjoyment of sex can be dependant on their circumstances (age, employment, type of relationship and so on). There are rewards and risks involved in having a sexual relationship, mutual appreciation and pregnancy being the most important ones and at a social level, it may mean that with a familiar partner, relatively secure income and stable environment, women in their late twenties and early thirties are most comfortable with sex. By contrast, by virtue of age and lack of life experience, there is the possibility that many teenage women and girls feel less than comfortable with sex.

Men tend (and are genetically programmed) to be more responsive to sex, in no small regard due to their lack of status as child-bearers. As they mature, so do these responses (if not necessarily their attitudes).

While more general than the topic, some people may find this Department of Health information of use:
Meningitis
Family Planning and Contraception
Women's Reproductive Systems OVER 16's ONLY PLEASE
Periods
Sexually Transmitted Infections
AIDS
Hepatitis B
Hepatitis C

smiles · 06-02-2002 7:58pm

Originally posted by sisob
She also said that teenage girls either generally have sex because of peer pressure or because of the power it gives them. She actually finds it hard to believe that any teenage girls enjoy sex.

Most of the girls I know who've had sex have definitly done it because of the pressure, whether they believe it or not, it's much more of an accepted thing to do, rather than pure pressure. "everyone's doing it, why am i not?" kinda thing, stupid as it may seem it's true.

Originally posted by Raggamuffin
i dunno i guess if you actually really like someone you'll just enoj it anyways

Not necessarily, it takes a lot more than just liking someone to enjoy sex with them.

<< Fio >>

sisob · 06-02-2002 8:09pm

interesting - I ask a question and people from other parts of the board answer, not my friends from the ctyi board who's opinions im most interested in. I guess they are just sick of me talking about sex.

that said the replies were very interesting

SOL · 06-02-2002 10:19pm

Yeah all guys from age......... well when ever, up are horny ands want to have sex its called testosterone poisoning and it has some really amusing effects, especially when combined with alcohol.
Thats just life.

(and isn't this just about sex and not sexuality?)

chernobyl · 06-02-2002 10:25pm

Originally posted by smiles

Not necessarily, it takes a lot more than just liking someone to enjoy sex with them.

<< Fio >>

Your damn right, love does not equal great sex, a small bit of know how, which generally can only be gained from experience but also from being modest enough to ask what she likes and not be so arrogant as to think you loved it so automatically she did too.

Cait · 06-02-2002 10:56pm

and what's with peoples thing against homosexuality. people have being calling me a lesbian (as if it's the worst thing in the world to be) but whatever they want to think. but what's really stupid is one guy asked my best friends was i a lesbian because he saw me hugging a girl. are people just crazy?

lordsippa · 06-02-2002 11:36pm

Re: the girl thing. I don't know. I have yet to master the female mind but I'm gonna take fios word on it.

Re: the guy thing. Guys are horny pricks who will, given half the chance, leech of anything VAGUELY female (and often not even) for sexual gratification. With rare exceptions. And those usually just use their hands.

And on the homosexual issue, I am quite blatantly bi. And I hate having to be straight around everyone, but it is quite obvious that this world is no more tolerant than it ever was. We just have laws to protect *that* behaviour now. Even my parents are openly homophobic. GRR!

smiles · 06-02-2002 11:37pm

Originally posted by Cait
and what's with peoples thing against homosexuality. people have being calling me a lesbian (as if it's the worst thing in the world to be) but whatever they want to think. but what's really stupid is one guy asked my best friends was i a lesbian because he saw me hugging a girl. are people just crazy?

People are indeed crazy, and close-minded, and insular.

I mean the things i've been called by people for hugging guys and girls withing seconds of each other (like, oh MY GAWD!) it tends to be annoying.

<< Fio >>

phaxx · 07-02-2002 12:01am

Originally posted by lordsippa
Even my parents are openly homophobic. GRR!

On people being homophobic, a friend of mine pretended to be gay for a year and a half to annoy all the homophobics in the school.

He pretended to come on to one of the really "manly" guys, and ended up in the vice principal's office explaining his behaviour - he said "I'm gay!".. the teachers present looked at each other, said "Errr.." and let him go.

sisob · 07-02-2002 2:28pm

Originally posted by SOL
(and isn't this just about sex and not sexuality?) [/B]

I probably shoud have called it "sex and sexuality" but I wanted to leave it open.

____________________________

I think that guy's need to learn that it is a good thing to control our sexuality - at least some of the time

Asuka · 07-02-2002 5:28pm

I probably shoud have called it "sex and sexuality" but I wanted to leave it open.

The conversation or the thread?

I was going to post an opinion but i just realised i dont actually have one

A

Victor · 07-02-2002 7:07pm

Originally posted by lordsippa
I have yet to master the female mind

Very few do. See the Men -v- women jokes in the humour section.

Victor · 07-02-2002 7:10pm

Originally posted by Cait
and what's with peoples thing against homosexuality. people have being calling me a lesbian (as if it's the worst thing in the world to be) but whatever they want to think. but what's really stupid is one guy asked my best friends was i a lesbian because he saw me hugging a girl. are people just crazy?

IT's OK, many of us men are small-minded and paranoid.

Crash · 08-02-2002 7:42pm

Originally posted by Cait

and what's with peoples thing against homosexuality. people have being calling me a lesbian (as if it's the worst thing in the world to be) but whatever they want to think. but what's really stupid is one guy asked my best friends was i a lesbian because he saw me hugging a girl. are people just crazy?

I hate close-miinded people. i have to put up with assholes in my class slaging one of the 6thyrs just cus he's openly gay.

Close-mindeness is probably the one main reason i disliked (with a vengeance) my roommate. he was not open to anything anyone had to say!!

Alk3 · 08-02-2002 10:10pm

Here's my thoughts on the whole thing,

1. Teenage Sex.
In all reality I could lose my virginity to a perfect, funny, sound, sexy, gorgeous girl on Valentines day. However, I don't want to because to be honest I amn't ready to.

2. Gay / Lesbian / Bi
All i can say to GLB people and GLB couples is fair play to you! You endure endless insults and such from close minded assholes who are probably just hiding their true feelings (which they are afraid of) by slagging you guys. Fair Play.

3. Guys and Girls
We guys will never understand girls, it's that simple. Ye girls can play us like fools but we can never, ever (!!) understand you girls. Let alone play you like fools.

4. Lesbians - Part II
Guys are fascinated by lesbians, we just are. Not a single guy I know can explain it, but we are fascinated by lesbians. Lesbians rock and despite the fact they have absolutely no interest in guys, guys will do anything to get a lesbians attention -- lesbians can play guys better than any straight woman can, I can't explain it. It's true.

Their just my thoughts, enjoy. I give a maximum of 4 days before someone realises who I am. (I am a CTYI'er in case you hadn't guessed yet.)

duran duran · 08-02-2002 10:31pm

most irish lads get so tense around any truly open discussion of sexuality that its really quite amazing that learn the ropes at all.

i think its sad that some men here have provided us with absurd explinations to explain why all so many younger woman don't enjoy sex. its nonsense. if younger women don't enjoy sex its probably because the majority of straight males know very little about thier own bodies, never mind the opposite sex.

Alk3 · 08-02-2002 10:40pm

This is the way I see the whole 'open sexuality discussion' thing.

<rant="masturbation">
In my school, most lads will freely admit to masturbating and a decent majority of those lads will go into detail (techniques et ál). Around here where I live, things are pretty much the same except with less of the more detailed explanations. In CTYI, I don't think it came up but I can almost guarantee that every single residential lad there had a **** during those 3 weeks. Us commuters did aswell, but we had the comfort of our own homes.

</rant>

Also, as regards discussing sexuality -- in my experience, lads will talk -- be it to girls or other lads, about their sexuality. Several people I know have talked to me about having gay fanatasies and they have been a bit uncomfortable, but they have done it none the less. I dunno, I amn't making much sense.

Anyway, you guys got my view on the thing and another clue as to who I am.

sisob · 08-02-2002 11:13pm

Originally posted by Alk3
Here's my thoughts on the whole thing,

3. Guys and Girls
We guys will never understand girls, it's that simple. Ye girls can play us like fools but we can never, ever (!!) understand you girls. Let alone play you like fools.

I disagree. People who know me very well
"might" back me up when I say that I understand women very well. I think it's something you'r born with. Women aren't really all that complicated. It's fun to play with their minds *grinn* but i wouldnt do that. and I have yet to find a woman/girl who can "play me". Some women understand men - and can manipulate them. and some men understand women and can do the same - but most men just try to use their understanding to get sex.

4. Lesbians - Part II
Guys are fascinated by lesbians, we just are. Not a single guy I know can explain it, but we are fascinated by lesbians. Lesbians rock and despite the fact they have absolutely no interest in guys, guys will do anything to get a lesbians attention -- lesbians can play guys better than any straight woman can, I can't explain it. It's true.

I think that guy's are attracted to porn-lesbians. a far cry from the lesbians of real life - not to say that all lesbians, or even most are stereotipical "real life lesbians".

sisob · 08-02-2002 11:15pm

Originally posted by duran duran
most irish lads get so tense around any truly open discussion of sexuality that its really quite amazing that learn the ropes at all.

i think its sad that some men here have provided us with absurd explinations to explain why all so many younger woman don't enjoy sex. its nonsense. if younger women don't enjoy sex its probably because the majority of straight males know very little about thier own bodies, never mind the opposite sex.

just curious - what sex are you

those men who made "absurd explinations" made buch better arguements that you - you just sound scared because this descussion is challenging your beliefs

Cake Fiend · 08-02-2002 11:24pm

Back on topic for a sec...

Remember that your step-mother is expressing her point of view - not solid fact. TBH I think women are more sexually-liberated in modern times. I'd imagine it's more socially acceptable now for a woman to have sex for fun, to have multiple partners within a fairly short space of time, to express sexual desire, etc than it would have been a couple of generations ago. I would think that the situation would have been a bit different when your stepmum was young - differences in culture, media exploration/exploitation of sex, popular social 'presets' for how a woman should behave, etc etc.

I find it hard to believe that a woman in her early- to mid-twenties, confident in herself and free from the social pressures and expectations experienced by a teenage adolescent, would have sex purely out of peer pressure or desire of control/power.
Just as a personal example, with the last girl I was involved with (21-year old), she initiated sex just as often as I did. This was because she enjoyed sex, not because she was worried about what her friends thought or because she wanted to feel dominant over me (there are things called handcuffs for that

).

As for the other discussion in this meandering thread - I would feel quite concerned for someone who immediately jumps to a conclusion of someone's sexuality based on e.g. hugging someone of the same sex. Anyone who automatically thinks a girl is a lesbian because of hugging another girl has issues. I'm quite clearly straight, but I wonder what some people would think of the fact that I have kissed gay friends of mine goodbye (on the cheek), just the same I would a female friend.

BTW, shouldn't this be on Humanities or some such?

sexuality

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