sexuality

sisob

Originally posted by Sico



BTW, shouldn't this be on Humanities or some such?

well I usually have conversation like this with my CTYI friends but i havent seen most of them much recently so i was specifically looking for their opinions. I didnt expect loads of other people to post. but as it turns out it is an interesting thread.


but back to the topic:

for the record I don't agree with my step-mother. she even admits that even in her day she was very conservative.

My current opinion (after all the waffle) is that a sufficiently mature teenage girl is as capable of enjoying a sexual relationship as an older women - as long as she is with the right partner - who is both loving and doesnt just concider sex a way of getting relief.

But I do think that the majority of teenage girls who have sex do so because of pier pressure.

The girls who enjoy it are the lucky ones because they are likely to be in a mature relationship - the ones who dont are no likely to see their partner again a lot of the time

Victor

Originally posted by sisob
My current opinion (after all the waffle) is that a sufficiently mature teenage girl is as capable of enjoying a sexual relationship as an older women - as long as she is with the right partner - who is both loving and doesnt just concider sex a way of getting relief.

/me is feeling frustrated ....

lordsippa

ok... i pride myself on being able to understand women better than most men. my point was simply that i'll never FULLY know what it's like to be a woman, nor see the world through a womans eyes. Do I menstruate? To cut the ensuing debate short: no. i do not. Will I ever be pregnant or ever have to worry about it? No. Or at least I hope not.

So that's what i meant bout that.


As regards gay fantasies... let's not be going into that again... not that I'm hiding anything but when Brian Molko doesn't return your calls it kinda disillusions you. ;P


lesbians are, based on the ones i know, pretty cool. and there is a sort of "well... i know a good few lesbians!" coolness to it. but really, i don't see what all the fuss is. i mean, they're people. who like women. like i do (usually). so they're competition like most guys, but i get along with guys so i get along with them and everyone's happy! now, the stereotypical feminist lesbian on the other hand...

SOL

i can't understand myself let alone women, and the lense of my life is horribly warped by an overdose of testosterone, good luck to those who think they under stand people, i don't and won't even try to pretend to.

chernobyl

Originally posted by sisob


I think that guy's are attracted to porn-lesbians. a far cry from the lesbians of real life - not to say that all lesbians, or even most are stereotipical "real life lesbians".

I think two women kissing is far sexier than them going down on each other.[but even two women flirting with each other has the same effect].

Typedef

: sexuality :

Yes please! I like a little tea with my sugar

I would say sexuality and it's stagmatisation is the world's oldest and most effective means of population control. Think about it the acients didn't have contraceptive devices and compounds the way they exist in this epoch therefore before such things it was necessary to impose societal(sp) axioms onto people regarding sex as sex led to procreation so, if people were allowed by society to do it for fun there would be an exponential population explosion and that must have been the root reason behind the judean,christian,muslim and inumerate other religious practices that attempted to impose monogomy or in the case of some Muslims and Mormans and probably loads of other religions a monied background onto procreation. It follows if you can afford X wives you have Y means of supporting said wives else the father of the bride in culture Z does not allow you cart off his daughter to bed(s) N. Therefore monogomy in a patriarchial world is not important for the male. Else if you are not so well financially endowed you may have only one wife.

Certainly in 'western' culture monogomy and the stigmatisation of the act of procreation is a subtle form of population control.

QED.

[There was this big spider]

chernobyl

Originally posted by Typedef
[BCertainly in 'western' culture monogomy and the stigmatisation of the act of procreation is a subtle form of population control.

QED.

[There was this big spider] [/B]

Its a form on control, and it gives incredible power, if you can control how and when ppl get down, then you basically own them.

androphobic

Hey..

I'm not a CTYI person but this is an interesting thread so what the hell.:)

I disagree with your stepmother. I'm 19, my boyfriend is 20 and we've been together for about 7 months. I completely enjoy the sex we have, and it is not done out of pressure from him or from anyone else, but simply because I am in a secure relationship, enjoy it immensely and am in love with him.

Okay I've slept around a bit before but I didn't enjoy that half as much as this..

smiles

Originally posted by Alk3
<rant="masturbation">
In CTYI, I don't think it came up but I can almost guarantee that every single residential lad there had a **** during those 3 weeks. Us commuters did aswell, but we had the comfort of our own homes.
</rant>

I do believe I remember someone telling me about a conversation a group of lads were having where the general message was "Lads, not at CTYI."

Originally posted by sisob

I disagree. People who know me very well "might" back me up when I say that I understand women very well. I think it's something you'r born with.

You do indeed tend to understand everyone quite well.

Originally posted by sisob

Some women understand men - and can manipulate them. and some men understand women and can do the same - but most men just try to use their understanding to get sex.

I know that I have been able to manipulate people and that it can be fun, but in my experience it tends to cause alot more trouble than it's worth so i'm content with knowing how guys will (in general) act, but keeping well away from playing with them.

Originally posted by Sico
I find it hard to believe that a woman in her early- to mid-twenties, confident in herself and free from the social pressures and expectations experienced by a teenage adolescent, would have sex purely out of peer pressure or desire of control/power.
Just as a personal example, with the last girl I was involved with (21-year old), she initiated sex just as often as I did. This was because she enjoyed sex, not because she was worried about what her friends thought or because she wanted to feel dominant over me (there are things called handcuffs for that ).

I think that sisob was talking about teenagers more than twenty-somethings, and he is right, there is alot of pressure there, not so much vocalised (unless you have a _bastard_ of a boyfriend, of which there is thankfully very few) but its kinda the accepted thing and so that in itself makes girls pressured by it whether its strong or not.

Originally posted by sisob
The girls who enjoy it are the lucky ones because they are likely to be in a mature relationship - the ones who dont are no likely to see their partner again a lot of the time

That isn't necessarily true, just because a girl doesnt enjoy sex doesnt mean the guy wont hang round (i think what you were getting at was that most teenage sexual relationships tend to be fickle and shortlived) but even if they're not the guy might not care or even know how to make it more enjoyable for the girl, and the girl might still want to have sex despite the lack of enjoyment. (i've had this discussion with several girls and that seems to be the general conscensus)

Originally posted by lordsippa
lesbians are, based on the ones i know, pretty cool. and there is a sort of "well... i know a good few lesbians!" coolness to it. but really, i don't see what all the fuss is. i mean, they're people. who like women. like i do (usually). so they're competition like most guys, but i get along with guys so i get along with them and everyone's happy! now, the stereotypical feminist lesbian on the other hand...

There are a lot of young girls out there who have experimented sexually with other girls and therefore call themselves lesbians, to cut it short I dont honestly think that anyone who tries something is, and i do believe that it is very much a popular culture in some circles to be gay or bi. (no offense to gay/bi people, i'm talking about the people who claim the name without acually being)

Originally posted by SOL
i can't understand myself let alone women, and the lense of my life is horribly warped by an overdose of testosterone, good luck to those who think they under stand people, i don't and won't even try to pretend to.

Girls pretend to be a lot more complicated than guys, but we do tend to exagurate things and so seem more complicated that we really are. I'd say I understand most guys better than I understand most girls and indeed myself!

Originally posted by Typedef
[...]that must have been the root reason behind the judean,christian,muslim and inumerate other religious practices that attempted to impose monogomy or in the case of some Muslims and Mormans and probably loads of other religions a monied background onto procreation

[getting a bit away from the point] I think that the basis for most religions is on how to try to live a happy life, monogomy generally tends to less people getting their feelings hurt, the Catholic churchs teaching on "no sex before marriage" I think was based on the idea that a marriage family was the most stable background for bring up children which would be the best for them (a stable background that is, not necessarily a married family), well in my opinion anyway.

Originally posted by androphobic
I disagree with your stepmother. I'm 19, my boyfriend is 20 and we've been together for about 7 months. I completely enjoy the sex we have, and it is not done out of pressure from him or from anyone else, but simply because I am in a secure relationship, enjoy it immensely and am in love with him.

This is a good thing, I think the point being made was that some girls aren't quite as lucky to enjoy sex at a young (I thought we were talking 14/15) age.

I remember back in second year when I really started getting into long term serious relationships that there was always the annoying bunch of people going on about sex and taunting other people about their (supposed) lack of, or overindulgence in, sex. It annoyed me actually, in my opinion if you feel ready you might not actually be, its alot to do with maturity but alot more to do with your mentality (both as in state of mind at the time and your attitude towards sex)

Originally posted by Sico
BTW, shouldn't this be on Humanities or some such?

This is a community forum and in general the stuff put up here is for discussion by members of just this community, [see "What is CTYI" thread for more of this explanation], but I think everyone's opinion is welcome in this discussion.

Well I think this has been one long reply! (better stop now!)

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