bar exam

FatB · 06-02-2002 4:26pm #1

> 1. "YOU GET THIS ONE, NEXT ROUND IS ON ME."
> (We won't be here long enough to get another round.)
>
> 2. "I'LL GET THIS ONE, NEXT ONE IS ON YOU."
> (Happy hour is about to end... beers are now a £1.50, but by the next
>round they'll be £4.50 a pop.)
>
>3. "HEY, WHERE IS THAT FRIEND OF YOURS?"
>(I have no interest in talking to you except as a way to get your
>attractive friend into a compromising position.)
>
>4. "WHAT DO YOU HAVE ON TAP?"
>(What's cheap?)
>
>5. "I'LL HAVE A GLASS OF HOUSE WHITE."(FEMALE)
>(I'm easy.)
>
>6. "I'LL HAVE A GLASS OF HOUSE WHITE (MALE)
>(I'm gay.)
>
>7. "I'LL HAVE A WHITE RUSSIAN." (FEMALE)
>(I'm really easy.)
>
>8. "I'LL HAVE A WHITE RUSSIAN." (MALE)
>(I'm really gay.)
>
>9. "DO YOU HAVE ANY SAMBUCA?"
>(I want to make my friend really sick so we can all laugh at him in
>the morning)
>
>10. "EVER TRY A BODY SHOT?" (MALE TO FEMALE)
>(I am even willing to drink tequila if it means that I get to lick you.)
>
>11. "EVER TRY A BODY SHOT?" (FEMALE TO MALE)
>(If this is how wild I am in the bar, can you imagine what I'll do
>to you in bed!)
>
>12. "CAN I JUST GET A GLASS OF WATER?" (FEMALE)
>(I am really annoying, but cute enough to get away with this.)
>
>13. "CAN I JUST GET A GLASS OF WATER?" (MALE)
>(It's 6:00 am and I just stopped drinking an hour ago. Hell, I
>probably spent half my paycheck in here last night, it is the least you can
>do
>for me.)
>
>14. "I DON'T FEEL WELL, LET'S GO HOME." (FEMALE)
>(You're paying more attention to your friends than to me.)
>
>15. I DON'T FEEL WELL, LET'S GO HOME." (MALE)
>(I'm horny.)
>
>16. "WHO'S GOT THE NEXT ROUND?"
>(I haven't bought a round in almost 3 years, but I am an expert at
> diverting attention.)
>
> 17. "EXCUSE ME." (MALE TO MALE)
> (Get the hell out of the way.)
>
>18. "EXCUSE ME." (MALE TO FEMALE)
>(I am going to grope you now and blame it on the crowd.)
>
>19. "EXCUSE ME." (FEMALE TO MALE)
>(Don't even think about groping me, just get the hell out of my way.)
>
>20. "EXCUSE ME." (FEMALE TO FEMALE)
>(Move your fat ass. Who do you think you are anyway? You're certainly not
>all that, missy, coming in here dressed like ho...And get your eyes
>off of my man, or I'll slap you like the slut you are,bitch.)
>
>21. "THAT PERSON LOOKS REALLY FAMILIAR."
>(Did I sleep with him/her?)
>
>22. "I DON'T HAVE MY ID ON ME." (FEMALE)
>(I'm 16.)
>
>23. "I DON'T HAVE MY ID ON ME." (MALE)
>(I don't have a licence since I got pulled over and blew a .4 after my
>last visit here.)
>
>24. "NO, REALLY, I'M OK TO DRIVE." (I'm wasted, and I am too
>embarrassed to have anybody see who I am going home with.)
>
>25. "I'M NOT USED TO THESE DARTS."
>(I'm can't throw anything smaller than a pool cue when I am this bombed.)
>
>26. "LET'S GO OUT TO MY CAR AND GET SOME CIGARETTES." (MALE TO FEMALE)
>(You would look great face down in my lap.)
>
>27. "I'VE HAD LIKE 10 BEERS ALREADY."
>(I've only had 3 but need an excuse to behave this way.)
>
>28. "YOU GO AHEAD, I'LL CATCH A CAB."
>(I already lined up a ride home with your 'ex'.)