Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

Post your text message jokes here...

Options
2»

Comments

  • Options
    #32
    Kolodny
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,634 ✭✭✭Kolodny


    ****ABRACADABRA!****
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    Nope. You're still ugly...


  • Options
    #33
    Kolodny
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,634 ✭✭✭Kolodny


    Friendship is like peeing in your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth of it - thanx for yours!!


  • Options
    #34
    irishguy
    Registered Users Posts: 3,299 ✭✭✭irishguy


    i wanted to send u something beautiful,kind,attractive,funny,sexy but the postman told me to get the fu*k out of the postbox!!!

    MOTTO FOR LIFE:
    Work like u dont need the money,love like you`ve never been hurt, dance like nobody is watching + **** like your being filmed

    so the queen mum meets lady di in heaven & says "how do i get a halo like ur`s?. Di turns 2 her & says "fuc* off gran,its a steering wheel!"

    Why is a woman like a bucket of K.F.C???
    Because once your past the tender breast and the juicy thigh, all u have left is a greasy wet box to put your bone in

    Farmer orded a MILKING MACHINE.Tryd it on his penis & had a wundrful orgasm but cant remove it.He reads d manual & faints.It says "AUTO RELEASE AFTER 2GALLONS"


  • Options
    #35
    peterd
    Registered Users Posts: 258 ✭✭peterd


    Carlsberg don't send players home from the World Cup but if we did they would probably be the best in the world.


  • Options
    #36
    Samson
    Users Awaiting Email Confirmation Posts: 3,129 ✭✭✭Samson


    I asked the Lord for a flower, and he gave me a garden.
    I asked the Lord for a tree, and he gave me a forest.
    I asked the Lord for a cunt.....

    and he gave me your number.


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #37
    Okie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 651 ✭✭✭Okie


    A man walks into the doctors office and says:
    "Doc, I've got a problem with my foot"

    Doc says:
    "Take it out and we'll have a look"

    Man pulls out his willy!

    Doc says:
    "That's not a foot!"

    Man says:
    "Ah come on, it's at least 11 inches"
    :D


  • Options
    #38
    Corega
    Registered Users Posts: 857 ✭✭✭Corega


    Apologies in advance.

    The Queens dead, the Queens dead. Carlsberg don't do txt messages but if they did they'd probably be the best messages in the world.


Advertisement