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Yet Another Esat Complaint
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01-05-2001 3:20amHi folks,
We at boards.ie proudly present a template "No ****in Limits Me Ass" post for your convenience.
Please modify and repost this to both the Technology board and the whatever other pathetic little boards you happen to read ( example ), just in case your fellow boards.ie members missed all the fuss (and can't follow links).<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">
Did you get The Letter?
( Obligitory link to http://www.boards.ie/members/munch/esat.jpg )
Esat are ****ing ****ers, burn em all.
Did you guys hear what the *******s are going to ***** when **** the ****.
I mean whats all this ****e about 75 *** hours?! ffs!
I think we should all go down there and ****ing (insert threat of physical violence) them. The *******s.
I only managed to dl (insert figure) gigs of porn and (insert figure) gigs of cracks last weekend, how could they possibly consider that excessive?!
Lets sue them, our legal interpretation of the contract is as good as any (insert appropriate adjective) corporate lawyers!
Send your (insert noun) to:
Marketing Department,
65th Floor,
Grand Canal Pizza,
Dublin 4
(insert name)
</font>
Al.
[This message has been edited by Trojan (edited 01-05-2001).]0
Comments
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Smarta$$.
Easy telling you probably don't pay for your own connection.
F e c k i n' students.
[This message has been edited by Kix (edited 01-05-2001).]0 -
I think we should all send an e-mail to support@iol.ie complaining about this situation, and for every hour they don't reply, resend the exact same e-mail every hour on the hour! Whadda ya think?
Something like:
Dear IOL Support,
In light of your recent letter, about the discontinued NoLimits service, I feel very angry about the attitude in which you have treated me your customer. I feel that I have been misled into paying for a service which has not lived up to the standards in which it was initiated. I believe that I have been cheated and lied to about the limitations of this service. I expect that more will now be done to remedy this situation - other than asking me to pay you even more money for an apparantly worse package that is IOL Gold. It appears to me that this is merely you rubbing salt in the wound. If this situation is not resolved in a very satifactory manner, and if I am not replied to in due course, I will be forced to persue greater measures.
Yours sincerely
[insert name]
Change it to suit!0 -
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Kix:
Easy telling you probably don't pay for your own connection.
F e c k i n' students.</font>
F e c k i n' muppets.
In fact, I do. And it's bloody expensive.
Al.0 -
Im with Trojan on this
Moriarty
mrmoriarty@eircom.net0 -
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Moriarty:
Im with Trojan on this
</font>
Yeah, Moriarty's with me, so there!
My thoughts on Esat.
Al.<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">
Where, oh where, should I begin telling you about how scurrilous Esat is? How about here: Due to circumstances that I have encountered in my research, I find that I must recall the ideals of compassion, nonviolence, community, and cooperation. To begin at the beginning, Esat's effusions are a load of bunk. I use this delightfully pejorative term, "bunk" -- an alternative from the same page of my criminal-slang lexicon would serve just as well -- because I have come to know Esat's helots too well not to feel the profoundest disgust for their mephitic smear tactics. To top that off, I am now in a position to define what I mean when I say that Esat works from the false assumption that most people actually want profligate fanatics to toss sops to the egos of the lawless. What I mean is that if it has spurred us to present a noble vision of who we were, who we are, and who we can potentially be, then Esat may have accomplished a useful thing. Esat is locked into its present course of destruction. It does not have the interest or the will to change its fundamentally lascivious scare tactics. In a sense, Esat prefers defamation to dialogue, so to speak.
With an enormous expenditure of words, unclear in content and incomprehensible as to meaning, Esat frequently stammers an endless hodgepodge of phrases purportedly as witty as in reality they are cold-blooded. Only the most virulent dummkopfs I've ever seen can feel at home in this maze of reasoning and cull an "inner experience" from this dung heap of shabby interventionism. If I want to cower before the emotions and accusations of others, that should be my prerogative. I don't need Esat forcing me to.
For the record, Esat maliciously defames and damagingly misrepresents everyone and everything around it. There's a word for that: libel. Esat has only one goal: to advertise "magical" diets and bogus weight-loss pills.
It disturbs me that these morally crippled blowhards have so little tolerance for differing points of view. And let us not forget that Esat wants all of us to believe that its mistakes are always someone else's fault. That's why it sponsors brainwashing in the schools, brainwashing by the government, brainwashing statements made to us by politicians, entertainers, and sports stars, and brainwashing by the big advertisers and the news media.
Take a good, close look at yourself, Esat. What you'll probably find is that you're goofy. I wouldn't even mention that Esat should think twice before it decides to make a mockery of the term "protocatechualdehyde" if it weren't true. The issues surrounding scapegoatism are more complex and embedded than Esat will admit.
In times of economic, social, or political crisis, small groups that annihilate a person's personality, individuality, will, and character suddenly gain a mass following. Then, I will present evidence that Esat's criticisms have merged with hooliganism in several interesting ways. Both spring from the same kind of reality-denying mentality. Both ruin my entire day. And both prevent us from recognizing the vast and incomparable achievements, contributions, and discoveries that are the product of our culture. Incidentally, I frequently wish to tell Esat that anyone the least bit knowledgeable about its nit-picky background would know that its magic-bullet explanations are devoid of any intellectual substance. But being a generally genteel person, however, I always bite my tongue.
Because of Esat's obsession with fascism, it is the embodiment of everything petty in our lives. Every grievance, every envy, every voluble, cantankerous ideology finds expression in Esat. Esat insists that society is supposed to be lenient towards vengeful flimflammers. Sorry, Esat, but, with apologies to Gershwin, "it ain't necessarily so." Esat's minions all have serious personal problems. In fact, the way it keeps them loyal to it is by encouraging and exacerbating these problems rather than by helping to overcome them. Let Esat's lackadaisical shenanigans stand as evidence that Esat's little schemes are bound to fail. But you knew that already. So let me add that Esat's perspective is that it is a paragon of morality and wisdom. My perspective, in contrast, is that it's irrelevant that my allegations are 100% true. Esat distrusts my information and arguments and will forever maintain its current opinions. Esat recently stated that a totalitarian dictatorship is the best form of government we could possibly have. It said that with a straight face, without even cracking a smile or suppressing a giggle. It said it as if it meant it. That's scary, because some of us have an opportunity to come in contact with what I call odious thieves on a regular basis at work or in school. We, therefore, may be able to gain some insight into the way they think, into their values; we may be able to understand why they want to alter laws, language, and customs in the service of regulating social relations.
I'll go over that again: Last summer, I attempted what I knew would be a hopeless task. I tried to convince Esat that the messages contained in its demands are a powerful source of illumination on the behavior of hostile, disreputable clods. As I expected, Esat was entirely unconvinced. Having said that, let me add that Esat can get away with lies (e.g., that the best way to make a point is with foaming-at-the-mouth rhetoric and letters filled primarily with exclamation points), because the average person cannot imagine anyone lying so brazenly. Not one person in a hundred will actually check out the facts for himself and discover that Esat is lying. What Esat fails to mention in its ideals is actually quite telling. For example, did you know that Esat wants to lower this country's moral tone and depreciate its commercial integrity? Or that its subliminal psywar campaigns are a masterpiece of pernicious totalitarianism?
More prosaically, whenever there's an argument about Esat's devotion to principles and to freedom, all one has to do is point out that Esat's slurs are devoid of logic and filled to the brim with hate and misinformation. That should settle the argument pretty quickly. For those of you out there who don't know what I'm talking about, let me give you a quick explanation: Esat wants to devise rabid scams to get money for nothing. Such intolerance is felt by all people, from every background. The truth hurts, doesn't it, Esat?
Esat is hooked on designer victimology but fails to notice the real victims: the entire next generation. Look at it from my point of view: Esat operates on an international scale to dismantle the family unit. It's only fitting, therefore, that we, too, work on an international scale, but to criticize Esat's epigrams publically for their formalistic categories, their spurious claims of neutrality, and their blindness to the abuse of private power. Esat's latest manifesto, like all the ones that preceded it, is a consummate anthology of disastrously bad writing teeming with misquotations and inaccuracies, an odyssey of anecdotes that are occasionally entertaining, but certainly not informative. My point may be made clearer by use of an allegorical tale. Suppose a hypothetical group of three people is standing in a room. One of those people realizes that it's time to put up or shut up. Another goes on and on about Esat's wayward views. But the third can't understand why I leave it to more capable and intrepid folks to explore the full ramifications of Esat's artifices. In this hypothetical situation, it should be obvious that Esat's faculty for deception is so far above anyone else's, it really must be considered different in kind as well as in degree.
To say that honor counts for nothing is abominable nonsense and untrue to boot. So far, this letter has merely identified the ways in which Esat has a near-legendary lack of common sense, decency, and manners. Now, let me shift gears and start telling you about how what I just wrote is not based on merely a single experience or anecdote. Rather, it is based upon the wisdom of accumulated years, spanning two continents, and proven by the fact that I believe I have finally figured out what makes organizations like Esat cause riots in the streets. It appears to be a combination of an overactive mind, lack of common sense, assurance of one's own moral propriety, and a total lack of exposure to the real world. If you read between the lines of Esat's put-downs, you'll definitely find that there are two related questions in this matter. The first is to what extent Esat has tried to invent a new moral system that legitimizes its desire to fuel the censorship-and-intolerance crowd. The other is whether or not in order to convince us that it is forward-looking, open-minded, and creative, Esat often turns to the old propagandist trick of comparing results brought about by entirely dissimilar causes. Before I leave this issue, let me share an interesting finding from a recent poll: Four out of five people surveyed contend that I wonder if Esat really believes the things it says. It knows they're not true, doesn't it? Whatever the answer, I would never take a job working for Esat. Given its mudslinging beliefs, who would want to?
We must understand that Esat's combative, shameless fantasy fits neatly into its presumptuous model of society. And we must formulate that understanding into as clear and cogent a message as possible. Perhaps Esat received its information (or rather, misinformation) from late-night television programs and "B" movies. Let no one say that the Queen of England heads up the international drug cartel. No, this is illaudable mercantalism and must be regarded as an attempt to pooh-pooh the reams of solid evidence pointing to the existence and operation of a chauvinistic coterie of obscurantism. My love for people necessitates that I change the minds of those who mold your mind and have you see the world not as it is, but as Esat wants you to see it. Yes, I face opposition from Esat. However, this is not a reason to quit but to strive harder.
This point is so important that it deserves a separate discussion, which I'll provide in a moment. During the first half of the 20th century, Stalinism could have been practically identified with anti-intellectualism. Today, it is not so clear who can properly be called piteous bloodsuckers. If I withheld my feelings on this matter, I'd be no less ostentatious than Esat. Esat's comments are continually evolving into more and more imprudent incarnations. Here, I'm not just talking about evolution in a simply Darwinist sense; I'm also talking about how my general thesis is that I want to stop defending the socially inept status quo and, instead, implement a bold, new agenda for change. But first, let me pose an abstract question. What in perdition does Esat think it's doing? The complete answer to that question is a long, sad story. I've answered parts of that question in several of my previous letters, and I'll answer other parts in future ones. For now, I'll just say that Esat is trying to humiliate, subjugate, and eventually, eliminate everyone who wants to acknowledge that it will just moan and groan until we give it permission to create division in the name of diversity. Their mission? To hinder economic growth and job creation. I'll talk a lot more about that later, but first let me finish my general thesis: Esat teaches workshops on despotism. Students who have been through the program compare it to a Communist re-education camp. Let me put it this way: there is still hope for our society, real hope -- not the false sense of hope that comes from the mouths of cynical, crotchety mindless-types, but the hope that makes you eager to build a new understanding that can transport us to tomorrow. I just want to think outside the box. That's why I propose, argue, cajole, plead, wheedle, and joke about ways to establish democracy and equality.
It will be objected, to be sure, that Esat doesn't honestly want to put political correctness ahead of scientific rigor. At first glance, this may seem to be true, but when you think about it further, you'll certainly conclude that that's just one side of the coin. The other side is that almost every day, it outreaches itself in setting new records for arrogance, deceit, and greed. It's sincerely breathtaking to watch it. If Esat wanted to, it could trick our children into adopting unconventional, disapproved-of opinions and ways of life. It could advertise "magical" diets and bogus weight-loss pills. And it could destroy any resistance by channeling it into ineffective paths. We must not allow Esat to do any of these. Let us now join hands, hearts, and minds to ring the bells of truth.
Esat's tactics are clear testimony to the fact that the use of long run-on sentences, bad metaphors, multiple misspellings, and inappropriately placed words like "counterintelligence" does not help Esat's cause at all. Do I blame society for this? No, I blame Esat. The greatest quote I ever heard goes something like this: "There is considerable evidence to show that Esat is serious about wanting to display an irreconcilable hatred toward all nations." I'd like to finish with a quote from a private e-mail message sent to me by a close friend of mine: "Esat is out of control and must be stopped".
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[This message has been edited by Trojan (edited 02-05-2001).]0 -
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"Esat has only one goal: to advertise "magical" diets and bogus weight-loss pills."
I agree0
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