You know you grew up in the 1970s if:

Hairy Homer

You once wondered how Jim Figgerty got the Figs into the Fig Rolls

You know there really was a person called Sheikh Yamani

You can remember when Dana stirred feelings of lust..

…..as indeed did Wendy Richards (Pauline Fowler in Eastenders)

You once believed only Protestant girls ‘did it’ before marriage

You think of Tony Blair as being ‘only’ 49

Most of your current friends are your kids’ friends’ parents

You’ve given up dreaming of being an international sports star and instead dream your son will become one

You understand the term: ‘Going on like a cracked record’

You have permanent back pain caused by wearing platform and wedge-soled shoes in your formative years

You had a selection of brightly coloured stripey knee socks to wear with your Bay City Rollers sawn-off parallels….

..and a central hair parting

Flares were considered avant garde instead of retro fashion

You sneered at anybody who dissed ‘progressive’ rock

You played a mean air guitar……

…and so did the girls who danced with you

15 minute guitar solos were essential elements of serious music

Ditto for 20 minute drum solos

You can remember when Manchester United were a second division team

…and the Irish soccer team really was Irish

You can remember when Wales had a good rugby team
(no really. they did)

There was at least one boy in your class who supported West Ham United

Most of the boys in your class wanted England to win the 1970 World Cup

The playing of ‘Furniture’ by Horslips was always the cue for a snogfest in a ballroom

‘Clubs’ were called discos…..

…and the DJ always played the utterly undanceable Black Betty by Ram Jam just to keep the lads happy

You could work a set of clackers

Dancing was a matter of jumping up and down and spitting at the same time

You remember the heroic futility of watching snooker in black and white…

..and you probably had only one TV channel….

..but aaah, the halcyon days of home-produced programmes: Wanderly Wagon, Daithi Lacha, Sean the Leprechaun, Let’s Draw with Blaithin (again in black and white)

Your Irish homework consisted of watching Buntus Cainte before you went to bed

You can remember the entire script of Monty Python’s Dead Parrot Sketch

You knew the names of all members of Pan’s People

Computers were things you only saw in American cop shows

You got a day off school for De Valera’s funeral…….

….and you had to line the streets to watch the cortege carrying John Charles McQuaid’s body go past

Johnnies were called Frenchies…

…and you had to go to Belfast to get them…

..or you could take a load of 5ps with you to Germany to get them cheaply from automatic machines

The closest thing to pornography was the Sunday World

You remember every single song ever performed by one of Louis Walsh's boy/girl bands when they first came out....

....and your greatest musical fear is all the ****e from the 1970s that they could still cover!!!!!