Classic jokes

Sparkle

How do you tell the difference between a cow and a bull?
Milk them both. The one that smiles is the bull.

Give a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day.
Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.


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A very popular girl (the town bicycle) went to her doctor
and found out that she was pregnant. The doctor says, "I
know that you are not married! Do you know who the father of
this baby is?" The girl thought and then asked, "Doc, if you
ate a can of 'Baked Beans', would you know which bean made
you FART?"

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In a primary school classroom, the teacher notices a little
puddle underneath Mary's chair.

"Oh Mary!" says the teacher, "you should have put your hand
up."

"I did," Mary replied. "But it still trickled through my
fingers."

Dave

"classic" eh..

pauldeehan

This one is true-

I was keeping house for my grandfather. The phone rang and I answered it.

Guy: Hello is Tommy there.
Me: Uh no he's away to a party he arranged.
Guy: Oh, is it for his clients?
Me: I hope not, he's an undertaker

.:rolleyes:

Spiffing

Originally posted by Sparkle
Give a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day.
Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

That's a joke?

woosaysdan

Husband 2 wife: can i take a foto of ur brests so i can look at them whenever i go away??
Wife 2 husband: sure u can if u let me take a foto of ur cock so i can at least get it enlarged!!!