The Gerry Ryan Show

Acidflash

On the Gerry Ryan radio show they were holding a
competition (for one hour only) for the listeners best jokes. The prize
was a sun holiday for two, for one week. Because of the time restraint
Gerry was rushing the entrants to try and get as many callers as
possible
to air their jokes. One Dublin bloke rang in with only 5 mins to the end
of the show:-

Caller. "An amazing thing happened to me recently. I had just
bought a
top of the range 67,000 pounds worth of Mercedes Benz. I
was thrilled with
the car. It had every extra. Revolving wheels,
see-through windscreen,
power assisted ash-tray, It was fully loaded."

Gerry: "That's very nice but, have you got a joke to tell or what?

Caller: "Hang on will you. You'll really love this; I drove out
from the
dealer and was driving down the road, when I noticed
that there was no
radio in the car. Can you imagine that? No feckin' radio
in a car that
cost me nearly seventy grand! So I turned right around
and headed back."

Gerry: "Get on with it will you, I've only a couple of minutes left and
we've to squeeze in an ad break too."

Caller: "Relax. I guarantee you this is brilliant. So anyway, I
go back to
the salesman and ask him where's the bleedin' radio and
that it better
not be extra. He started laughing and told me that there
was, in fact, a
state of the art voice activated radio fitted in the
car. He showed me how
it worked. It was UNBELIEVABLE! All you have to do is
say 'radio on' and it
turns on, radio off' and it turns off. It's bleedin'
magic. You say
'Ballads' and it plays Ballads,. 'Rock 'n' Roll' and a
rock & roll station
comes on. I've never seen anything like it."

Gerry: "You're wasting our feckin' time here, I'll have to move on and
try
to fit in a quickie before the end of the show."

Caller: "Hang on Gerry I'm nearly finished."

Gerry: "Just finish it will you."

Caller: "So I drove off again even happier than earlier on. Then
you won't
believe what happened. This idiot passed me on the
outside and clipped my
bumper on his way back in. 'Stupid B0ll0x !' I shouted
and you'll never
guess what happened."

Gerry: "What happened?"

Caller: "The Gerry Ryan Show came on the feckin' radio."


Footnote:- The caller didn't win the prize and was in fact abruptly
cut off.

bozzie

nice 1 almost worth the wait

Sparkle

Aw classic! Thats nearly as good as the lad that shook hands with Louis Walshe and said wanker!

BKtje

lmao

xern

excellent!!:D

Ruaidhri

that's almost as good as the cork radio one(if i can dig it up i'll post it )
a classic

Spunog UIE

smeeeeee?

wish i had heard that

nice one!

Thanx 4 The Fish

Almost as good as the one about the last place the couple had sex... Also a Gerry Ryan competition I believe.

po0k

pld sir, whoever you are.
Liver-lips Ryan shall have his downfall yet...there's only so much of him you can take in the mornign before switching over the RnaG.......

Lump

HE HE, take it Gerry you nob.


John

dahamsta

Hate to be a party pooper, but surely everyone knows at this stage that talk radio is on a seven-second delay?

adam

plastic membrane

Dang but thats a funny one