Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

Scots and English

Options
  • 04-07-2002 2:49pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 15,399 Mod ✭✭✭✭


    On a tour of Scotland, the Pope took a couple of days off his itinerary to visit the North coast near Aberdeen on an impromptu sightseeing trip. His 4X4 Popemobile was driving along the golden sands when there was an enormous commotion heard just off the headland. They rushed to see what it was and upon approaching the scene the Pope noticed just outside the surf, a hapless man wearing an England Football top, struggling frantically to free himself from the jaws of a twenty foot shark.

    At that moment a speedboat containing three men wearing a Scotland football top roared into view from around the point. Spontaneously, one of the men took aim and fired a harpoon into the shark's ribs,immobilizing it instantly.

    The other two reached out and pulled the Englishman from the water and then,using long clubs, beat the shark to death.
    They bundled the bleeding, semi conscious man into the speed boat along with the dead shark and then prepared for a hasty retreat, when they heard frantic shouting from the shore. It was of course the Pope, and he summoned them to the beach.

    Upon them reaching the shore the Pope went into raptures about the rescue and said, "I give you my blessing for your brave actions. I had heard that there were some racist xenophobic people trying to divide Scotland and England, but, now I have seen with my own eyes this is not true. I can see that your society is a truly enlightened example of racial harmony and could serve as a model on which other nations could follow."

    He blessed them all and drove off in a cloud of dust. As he departed, the harpoonist asked the others,
    "Who was that???!"
    "That," one answered, "was his Holiness the Pope. He is in direct contact with God and has access to all God's wisdom."
    "Well," the harpoonist replied, "he knows f--- all about shark
    hunting. How's that bait holding up or do we need to get another one?"


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 20,346 ✭✭✭✭KdjaCL


    heheheh

    veddy fuddy

    kdja


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,719 ✭✭✭Ruaidhri


    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA ****ing brilliant :)
    tat HAS to be an all time classic


Advertisement