how stupid children can get

spiderman

children put both legs in the 1 pants leg and make it to school without noticing

they fall in love with cartoon charters

the put there fingers back in plug sockets to show you how they got shocked

PyjamaMan

?

KdjaCL

humour board is sinking fast

kdja

Acidflash

ok!!! :rolleyes:

_sheep

oh christ, wtf is this

cujimmy

me no understand please explain

PyjamaMan

explain? ok, spiderman.............................is a muppet

spiderman

well the are able to get to school with there legs in the 1 leg of there pants

there stupid enough to fall in love with cartoons

and are stupid enough to enflict pain to them self to show u what hapend


ah u wouldent get it its more adult joke

zAbbo

the classic drunken post huh?

spiderman

i hate u payama man cos of that stupid spiderman thing

you spelt gay wrong do u no that

zAbbo

pot kettle black anyone?

Anybody know what this means " well the are"

baffled!

This sort of humour really does belong in the For Sale boards.

PPC

Originally posted by spiderman
i hate u payama man cos of that stupid spiderman thing

you spelt gay wrong do u no that

LOL thats the funniest thing in this thread

spiderman

suck on this

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead were playing Hide-And-Go-Seek with a farmer's son in his barn. So, when it was girls' turns to hide, they found some old potato sacks and crawled into them. The farmer's son soon enough came into the barn, and saw the potato sacks. He kicked the first one, which had the brunette in it, and she cleverly said, "MEOW!" So, the farmer's son moved on, thinking a cat was in the sack. He came to the sack with the redhead in it, kicked it, and she said, "WOOF WOOF!" He moved on, thinking a dog was in it. Finally, he came to the sack with the blonde in it. Thinking she was so very clever, after he kicked the sack, she cried, "POTATO!"

This blonde was at work one day and was getting so mad at her co-workers because they kept telling dumb blonde jokes. So she decided to show them. She would go home tonight and memorize ALL the capitals of each state. So she stayed up all night until she could say each capital. The next day, when her co-workers started the jokes again, she Yelled, "I'm no dumb blonde! I know all the capitals of the states!" So one of them walked up to her and said "Oh really? Well then, What's the capital of Wisconsin?" She said proudly, "W!"

A brunette, redhead and blonde went to a fitness spa for some fun and relaxation. After a stimulating healthy lunch, all three decided to visit the ladies room and found a strange-looking woman sitting at the entrance who said, "Welcome to the ladies room. Be sure to check out our newest feature: a mirror which, if you look into it and say something truthful, you will be awarded with a wish. But, be warned, for if you say something false, you will be sucked into the mirror to live in a void of nothingness for all eternity!" The three women quickly entered and upon finding the mirror, the brunette said, "I think I'm the most beautiful of us three" and in an instant she was surrounded by a pile of money. The redhead stepped up and said "I think I'm the most talented of us three" and she suddenly found the keys to a brand new Lexus in her hands. Excited over the possibility of having a wish come true, the blonde looked into the mirror and said, "I think..." and was promptly sucked into the mirror.

A father was reading Bible stories to his young son. He read, "The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city, but his wife looked back and was turned to salt." His son asked, "What happened to the flea?"

After putting her children to bed, a mother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. At last she threw a towel around her head & stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard her three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was that?"

An old lady, who lived on the third floor of a boardinghouse, broke her leg. As the doctor put a cast on it, he warned her not to climb any stairs. Several months later, the doctor took off the cast. "Can I climb stairs now?" asked the little old lady. "Yes," he replied. "Thank goodness!" she said. "I'm sick and tired of shinnying up and down that drainpipe!"

Old man Murray goes to the doctor with a very worried look on his face. "Doctor," he says, "You've got to help me. Do you remember those voices in my head I always complain about?"
"Yes," the doctor replies.
"Well they've suddenly gone away," Murray says.
"So what's the problem?"
"I think I'm going deaf."


Have you heard about the new Barbie Doll? It's called the "Barbie Divorce Doll" and it comes with all of Ken's stuff!

What do you call a blond corpse in the closet? The 1995 hide and seek champion! What was the last thought to go through her ? I WON!

Two peanuts were walking through Central Park. One was assaulted.

Two guys walked into a bar, but the third one ducked.

Two blondes were walking in the woods and they came upon some tracks. The first blonde said, "Oh look, deer tracks!" The second blonde then said, "No dummy, they're wolf tracks." Five minutes later a train hit them.

A married couple is in bed sleeping and someone knocks on the front door. So the husband gets up to check it out. It's some drunken guy, he asks the hubby for a push. So the husband goes in and talks it over with his wife. He doesn't want to help but she reminds him of the time when he was drunk and needed help. The man gets dressed and exits the house, ready to help the drunk. He looks around and finds the man sitting on their porch swing.

A guy walks into a bar and sits down. When he hears someone say "nice shirt" he asks the bartender, "Who said that?" The bartender replied, "The peanuts. They're complimentary."

There was a man who went to a baseball game. He buys a hot dog, and a coke. He finds a seat in the crowded stands and sits. He's about to take a bite of his hotdog when someone yells, "HEY BOB!" He stands up and looks around, but doesn't see anyone so he sits down. Right before he can take a sip of his drink someone yells, "HEY BOB!!" He stands up, looks around, doesn't see anyone and sits down. Again someone yells, "HEY BOB!!!" Agitated he stands up and screams, "MY NAME'S NOT BOB!!!!"

Two blondes go to a concert at the Silverdome and never come home. The next day the police went to their homes and told their parents the bad news. Their daughters drowned apparently while the crowd was doing the wave.

A mushroom walks into a bar. He asks the bartender for a beer and the bartender said no I'm not going to serve you, he asks the bartender a couple more times and the bartender says no I'm not going to serve you. Then the mushroom says "What's the matter? I'm a fun guy!"

Q:Have you heard about the new pirate movie?
A: Its rated "Arrrrr."

What should you do if a blonde throws a pin at you?
Run! She has a grenade in her mouth!

What do you two banana peels?
A pair of slippers.

Two blondes were standing on opposite sides of a river. The blonde on the far side of the river yells to the other blonde and says " How do I get to the other side?" The blonde on the nearer shore looks puzzled and yells back " You ARE on the other side"

What kind of cheese do dogs like on their pizza?
Muttzarella!!!!

What do smart blondes and UFO's have in common?
You always hear about them but never see them!!!

What do you call a deer that doesn't have any eyes?
No-eye deer!



What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?
Still no-eye deer!

A blond walks into a store and sees a TV she wants to buy, so she goes to the cashier and he says, "Sorry I don't sell to blondes." She goes home and dies her hair brown and goes back the next day and goes to buy the TV, the cashier then says, "Sorry I don't sell to blondes." So she goes home and dies her hair black and comes back the next day and tries to buy the TV, but the cashier says"sorry I don't sell to blondes" The blonde replies, "How can you tell?" "That's a microwave you're trying to buy."

How do you kill a dumb blond?
Put a scratch-and-sniff sticker on the bottom of a pool!!!

A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey, I've got a drink named after you." After a few seconds the grasshopper replies, "You have a drink named Steve?"

George is with a German and an Italian on a plane. The plane crashes on an desert island. They find a magic lamp with a genie and the genie grants them each one wish. First the German wishes to go home and "PUFF" he goes home. Then the Italian wishes to go home too and "PUFF" he is at home too. Then it's George's turn and he says, "Boy I sure miss those guys…."

An 80 year old couple were having problems remembering things, so they decided to go to their doctor to get checked out to make sure nothing was wrong with them. When they arrived at the doctor's, they explained to the doctor the problems they were having with their memory. After checking the couple out, the doctor tells them they are physically okay but might want to start writing things down and make notes to help them remember things.

The couple thank the doctor and left. Later that night while watching TV, the man got up from his chair and his wife asks, "Where are you going?" He replies, "To the kitchen." She asks, "Will you bring me a bowl of ice cream?" He replies, "Sure." She then asks him, "Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?" He says, "No I can remember that."

She then says, "Well I also would like some strawberries on top. You had better write that down because I know you will forget that." He says, "I can remember that, you want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries." She replies, "Well I also would like whipped cream on top. I know you will forget that so you better write it down. With irritation in his voice, he says, "I don't need to write that down! I can remember that." He then fumes into the kitchen.

After about 20 minutes he returns from the kitchen and hands her a plate of bacon and eggs. She stares at the plate for a moment and says angrily: "I TOLD you to write it down! You forgot my toast!"

garthv

what i wanna know is why that boards poster knows so much about kids.........

spiderman

i work in a day care part time. just for the summer

cujimmy

Maybe its me, maybe its because its sunday but wher did you get those jokes The readers digest?

Im_Not_Here

Spidy ~ i dont think they like your sense of humour around here! haha


Actually i gotta say it



ure jokes stink! haha

PyjamaMan

anybody think im not here is another spiderman/leopard clone ?

if u arent sorry mate

Gordon

Your Spidey-sense of humour seems to need honing!

I had to rate this thread low due to the fact that you put the joke about men walking into a bar (one of them ducking). I mean, to even attempt that joke nowadays especially in an internet board is... just... flabberghasting.

PyjamaMan

guys if i where u id stay away from spidarmaen....
SPIDERMAN WILL MAKE YOU GAY

Im_Not_Here

Originally posted by PyjamaMan
anybody think im not here is another spiderman/leopard clone ?

if u arent sorry mate

Im not a clone! :mad:



Im unique!!!

Tellox

did you get these jokes from christmas crackers?