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Problems with a female friend...

  • 31-08-2002 5:54pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I went to the debs with her a week ago as a friend (at her request more or less). She came up to me one night when I was out after I had asked her out to the debs a couple of days prior to this. She asked me in these exact words "are we going to it as friends?" with a kind of serious face. I knew by her that she would have preferred to go as friends. I really fancy her, but I like her as a friend too so I said that we should go as friends.

    The problem is that I didn't really want it that way and I didn't like to tell her how I felt. I wanted to go as boyfriend-girlfriend type of thing. I stayed true to my word on the night but I really am feeling gutted about the whole thing and it was a really bad night for me personally. I wasn't really talking to her the whole night as friends would normally do. We got on really well before this and that upset me really badly. At one point she asked me was I with anyone but I said I wasn't (I'm not really interested in anyone else). So I asked her the same and she said no too. We went our seperate ways then because the conversation broke up at that stage because there were other people around us at the time. She still didn't seem interested.

    I really felt bad the day after and I am going out tonight (I think she will be there). I want to get with her but its fairly obvious that she doesn't want the same. What should I say tonight? Should I just give up or what should I do?


Comments

  • #2
    leeroybrown
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,563 ✭✭✭leeroybrown


    Well if you consider her a friend you should be able talk to her anyway.

    If she's interested it will be reasonably apparent to you.

    You might as well talk to her as a friend anyway. If nothing comes of it no harm is done.


  • #3
    hedgetrimmer
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,070 ✭✭✭hedgetrimmer


    Debs are strange animals an not the best place to start a relationship. If she asked you whether you were with someone or not - that's a good indication of interest, IMO, so talk to girl... the other option is letting slide and regretting it, possibly for a long time


  • #4
    swiss
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,745 ✭✭✭swiss


    It sounds to me like you're trying to read too much into everything. You don't know how this girl feels about you, you just have your intuition, a dangerously erring, fickle and etheral emotion.

    You really are best off talking to her. You could even get a mutual friend you trust to talk to her about you (so she doesn't even have to know you're interested). If she is interested, well play it cool, and head out with her and see how things progress. If she isn't well at least you know so that you can get on with your life (rejection is a bitch but you'll get over it).


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