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a few jokes

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  • 25-11-2002 9:35am
    #1
    Rabies
    Registered Users Posts: 15,258 ✭✭✭✭


    Q. Why don't they have Christmas at D.C.U?

    A. They can't find a virgin and three wise men.

    Q. How do they separate the men from the boys at
    Trinity?

    A. With a restraining order.


    A severe storm rumbled through Carlow last week and
    destroyed the
    entire
    town:
    $10 worth of damage was reported.
    =

    Q. What do you get when you drive quickly through
    the Carlow
    campus?

    A. An undergraduate degree.

    Q. What's the first thing a U.C.D girl does when
    she wakes up in
    the
    morning?

    A. Walks home.

    Q. How can you tell if a Trinity student is
    heterosexual?

    A. He can outrun his roommate!

    Q. What does a IT student call a D.C.U student after
    graduation?

    A. Boss.

    (IT = Institute of Technology, not info tech)

    Q. Why do they sell so many button-fly jeans in
    Carlow?

    A. Because the sheep can hear the zippers a mile
    away.

    Q. Did you hear that the library at Trinity burned
    down?

    A. Naturally, the students were very upset....some
    of the books
    weren't
    coloured-in yet.

    Q. Why do Trinity graduates put a copy of their
    diploma in the window
    of
    their vehicles?

    A. So they can park in handicap spaces.

    Q. How do you get a IT grad off your front porch?

    A. Pay him for the pizza.

    Q. What do tornadoes and graduates from IT's have in
    common?

    A. They both end up in trailer parks.

    Q. How many Athlone IT students does it take to
    change a lightbulb?

    A. None - Westmeath looks better in the dark.

    Q. How many Trinity students does it take to change
    a lightbulb?

    A. One - he holds the bulb and the world revolves
    around him

    Q. How many UL students does it take to change a
    lightbulb?

    A. Three. One to change the lightbulb and two to
    figure out how to
    get
    high
    off the old one.

    Q. Did you hear An Post just recalled their latest
    stamps?

    A. They had pictures of Limerick players on them and
    people couldn't
    figure
    out which side to spit on.

    Q. What is the difference between a dead dog in the
    road and a dead
    Limerick
    fan in the road?

    A. There are skid marks in front of the dog.

    Q. If you see a Limerick fan on a bike why should
    you never swerve to
    hit
    him?

    A. It might be your bike.

    Q. What do Limerick fans and sperm have in common?

    A. One in 3,000,000 has a chance of winning an All
    Ireland.

    Q What do you have when 100 English fans are buried
    up to their neck
    in
    sand?

    A. Not enough sand.

    Q. What do Cork men use for birth control?

    A. Their personalities.

    Q. You are trapped in a room with a tiger, a
    rattlesnake, and a
    Kerry man. You have a gun with two bullets. What should
    you do?

    A. Shoot the Kerry man...twice.


Comments

  • Options
    #2
    Pep
    Closed Accounts Posts: 198 ✭✭Pep


    Q. How do you get a IT grad off your front porch?
    A. Pay him for the pizza

    Great heard most of em before but still good


  • Options
    #3
    Space Coyote
    Registered Users Posts: 2,164 ✭✭✭Space Coyote


    i got a joke for ye ...

    ...


  • Options
    #4
    Seraphina
    Registered Users Posts: 2,875 ✭✭✭Seraphina


    didn't you post that in another forum to the same non-funny effect?


  • Options
    #5
    oeNeo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,299 ✭✭✭oeNeo


    Originally posted by Space_Coyote
    i got a joke for ye ...

    ...


    Woah, cool, I've never seen that before! LOL! :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D





    *cough*


  • Options
    #6
    Space Coyote
    Registered Users Posts: 2,164 ✭✭✭Space Coyote


    Seraphina, u just don't get the humorousness of the thing.
    That doesn't make it unfunny.
    Do u even know who the guy in the picture is ???


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    #7
    Loco
    Registered Users Posts: 742 ✭✭✭Loco


    who is the guy in the picture Space_Coyote?


  • Options
    #8
    hussey
    Registered Users Posts: 6,240 ✭✭✭hussey


    The guy from chips no?? Erik Estrada


  • Options
    #9
    Ruaidhri
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,719 ✭✭✭Ruaidhri


    Originally posted by Rabies

    A severe storm rumbled through Carlow last week and
    destroyed the
    entire
    town:
    $10 worth of damage was reported.

    dollars,in carlow? your from foreign parts aint ye? :p
    tbh i never liked thos "inter-college rivalry" jokes..kinda lame(it's a low point for ya rabies :()


  • Options
    #10
    Space Coyote
    Registered Users Posts: 2,164 ✭✭✭Space Coyote


    Yep it's the guy from 'Chips' ... classic 70's/80's tv for any1 too young to remember...
    Officer Frank Poncharello, aka Erik Estrada.

    "CHiPs" is an acronym for California Highway Patrol...FASCINATING EH ?!

    For anyone pist off because i posted this pic more than once, (it was only twice i think) i am truely sorry if it upset you so much. if you took offence, well then that just means one thing.....


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