Worst Date Ever.......................

Kone · 22-01-2003 3:17pm #1

This was on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno. Jay went into the audience to
find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The winner
described her worst first date experience. There was absolutely no
question as to why her tale took the prize!

Marilyn said it was midwinter...snowing and quite cold...and the guy had
taken her skiing to Lake Arrowhead. It was a day trip (no overnight). No, not
Marilyn. They were strangers, after all, and truly had never met before.

The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home
late that afternoon. They were driving back down the mountain when she
gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra latte.
They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the
middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she
did for a while.

Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came a
point where she told him that he had better stop and let her pee beside the
road, or it would be the front seat of his car. They stopped and she quickly
crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started.
Unfortunately, in the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her butt rest
against the rear fender to steady herself. Her companion stood on the side of the
car watching for traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from
peeking.
All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather
embarrassing nature of the situation. Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of
another sensation. As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her
buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender. Thoughts of tongues
frozen to pump handles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her
flesh from the icy metal.

It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem due to the
extreme cold. Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor she answered her date's
concerns about "what was taking so long" with a reply that indeed, she was
"freezing her butt off and needed some assistance"! He came around the car as she tried
to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his
eyes, he burst out laughing. She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to
compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma. Obviously, as hysterical as the
situation was, they also were faced with a real problem. Both agreed it would take
something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! Thinking about what
had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that
there was only one way to get her free so, as she looked the other way, her first
time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender.

As for the Tonight Show...she took the prize hands down...or perhaps that
should be "pants down." And you thought your first date was embarrassing...
A whole new definition of being "pissed off."