How long befour I.L.U. ?

Doc

I was just wondering how long you people take befour you tell your girlfriends / boyfriends that you love them?
Do you let them say it first? Do the words scare the crap out of you?
If you realy liked a girl or guy from the start and thought you loved them how long would it take you to tell them?

Kell

When you are absolutely, and in no way uncertain, sure that you mean it. Brandishing those three little words around off the cuff can do a lot of damage and you need to be sure that you can deal with the fallout before you open your mouth and say anything.

Typedef

I was just wondering how long you people take befour you tell your girlfriends / boyfriends that you love them?

Wait until the time is right, no rushing young grasshopper.
Maybe never...

Do you let them say it first?

That is up to you.

Do the words scare the crap out of you?
No

If you realy liked a girl or guy from the start and thought you loved them how long would it take you to tell them?

Depends, it doesn't matter who says it 'first', I think, more that, both parties are of the same opinion, as opposed to paying lip service.

logic1

Whenever you think the lie will get you laid.

.logic.

Typedef

Originally posted by logic1
Whenever you think the lie will get you laid.

.logic.

My god... so blunt... so direct...

I like it homes.

Mercury_Tilt

This post has been deleted.

thedrowner

ive said it twice.

i said it first the first time 3 weeks into a relationship er.... because i was drunk (and i texted it) (i am such a baaaaad person). and i didnt actually love him at the time....i think i did love him a lot later on in the relationship but then i ended things when i didnt feel those feelings anymore. i feel so awful over it coz he thought the relationship was a lot more long term than i did.

the second time i *knew* i was in love after a week. but i didnt want to say it so soon (even though i kind of feel that when you feel something so important, you should say it). he officially said it me after about a month together (but i suspected he did ealier on coz it kind of slipped out in conversation). it was really nervewracking saying ti that time. we're not together any more though.

Chada

lol logic, its funny cos its true

hedgetrimmer

Fully, 1000%, what Kell said, though I do admit to bandying the phrase about in my youth far too much (ir oder to get laid, yes, I am a bad man, aren't we all until we grow up)

Victor

Originally posted by Doc
I was just wondering how long you people take befour you tell your girlfriends / boyfriends that you love them?
Do you let them say it first? Do the words scare the crap out of you?
If you realy liked a girl or guy from the start and thought you loved them how long would it take you to tell them?

You could fudge it with "I really like you" or "I wub u" or the likes, then check out the vibe.

smiles

Well anything under a month would make me run away screaming. lots.

Jesus, it does all depend, just wait until you're sure you love her, not just like her.

<< Fio >>

Riamfada

I have said it, but my last girl never said it too me.. auch. We broke up, suprisingly?

DriftingRain

I think you should never say it, unless you mean it. Those three words are very powerful. When a guy tells them to me for the first time I always get nervous. I always start with something like.. "I think we have gotten so much closer in the past BLAH BLAH BLA" It has usually worked out to be the crusher or the maker of my relationships. And it don't matter who says it first as long as it was said truthfully!;)

Doc

I would never say it unless I meant it but in the last relationship I was in I said it pretty quickly (after about a week and a half) we did stay together for nearly 2 years but I always thought that I had said it too soon despite the fact she said it back to me strait away.

In my new relationship we have become very close very quickly and have pretty much said everything but "I love you" too each other. It is going really well but I dont know what people think is a "safe" period of time to be going out with someone before you say it to them. Dont say when you feel like its safe because I already think it would be safe to say it and that she would say it back, I just dont want to come off over keen and pussing for her to say it too soon.

Sposs

it really depends on how well you know them,my girlfriend sayed it to me drunk after a week but the difference been with knew each other four years before we got together,it really is diiferent for everyone so i dont think you can put a timescale on when is the best time.

hedgetrimmer

to be honest, if you are questioning whether you should say it or not, then you shouldn;t say it, IMHHO.

Funny story. I was going out with this girl for like 3 months, she gave me a gold watch with the line "This is what we do where I'm from in order to get the man to propose". She wasn't kidding. And her daddy had a gun....


Fun times, fun times

Riamfada

I LOVE ALL OF YOU

Victor

Originally posted by Grimes
I LOVE ALL OF YOU

Slut!

TenLeftFingers

I fell in love with my current girlfriend within a month. I told her and she said ' I hop you don't mind that I didn't say it back'.

Everything was good, and I loved her more for that.

About two months later, she ILU'd me. Were still together. Der u hav it.

Ixidor

I love you to grimes!*


*terms and conditions a apply

monument

Originally posted by thedrowner
ive said it twice.

i said it first the first time 3 weeks into a relationship er.... because i was drunk (and i texted it) (i am such a baaaaad person). and i didnt actually love him at the time....i think i did love him a lot later on in the relationship but then i ended things when i didnt feel those feelings anymore. i feel so awful over it coz he thought the relationship was a lot more long term than i did.

What every about saying it, if after some time you’re not in love and know you will never be, you’re right to end it.

So you shouldn’t feel awful, you done the right thing

Kell

My heart is just brimming over here with all of this emotion (Wipes eye with corner of hanky) I love you all too. Lets all have a group hug.

By the way- whens the píss up and where? Did somebody mention the 21st?

parasite

i blame t.v. (grr...) for making it into some seismic event that must be overcome
mostly 'friends'

heh hehe

HJ Simpson

I said it to my current girlfriend after a few weeks while pissed sort of mid arguement. I had known her for a while and 5 years later we are now living together. I have to say I wouldnt recommend saying it to soon if you dont mean it.

AngelAine

I said it to my boyfriend after about a month. We were in bed and I just said it...The thing was he never answered me and I was in bits....felt really insecure because I had never said it to anyone before let alone feel like I loved someone....

He later admitted that he wasn't quite sure what I said (i kinda muffled it under the duvet) and didn't want to ask me and embarrass me...I don't know whether that was a cop out but he ended up ringin me up (about one week later) in a druken state telling me he had something to tell me when I got home (I was in Spain at the time) and then screamed I LOVE YOU down the phone.

19 months later....we are still together....

Wickhmar

Don't say it till she does. In fact, wait till she says it twice. then you can start thinking about using it, but use it wisely you must.

It's your Ace in the sleeve fellas, use it when you've really f*cked up, it'll get you out of trouble.

The reasoning behind this is the (under 35 year old) woman's incredible ability to get bored/scared if the relationship seems like it's working. remember that old saying; men marry women expecting they wont change, they do. Women marry men expecting they'll change, they don't.

Women love a challenge (don't deny it girls). If you don't present a challenge, you won't hold onto your girl very long. Why do you think 'nice guys always finish last'? I'm not saying you need to be a jerk. You need to strike a nice balance. I can guarantee you that if you run around with her on a pedestal brandying the words"I love you" every five minutes and putting her above yourself, your familiy and your friends the next thing you know you'll be getting the 'you're such a sweet guy, let's just be friends' treatment. Here are two choice quotes for all you Romeos out there:

"Don't say 'I love you'
Although a serious commitment is what you want, there is no need to pressure her early on. Saying, 'I love you' prematurely is a big no-no, as your girlfriend might feel forced to respond or may even reject you on the spot. Any talk of the future, like laying out plans for marriage and kids, can scare a woman off more than your rampant back hair.

Show your affection by reaching for her hand as you walk in the mall, touching her arm as you converse across the dinner table and making eye contact when she is talking to you. Don't feel that you have to display your newfound love right away -- at the beginning of a relationship, it's all about taking things slow."


"You have to be strong and resist saying those three little words. Don't worry about scaring her away; you'll be fine, as long as you show your love through your actions. But save the "I love you" for a rainy day."


Just my two cents, I'm sure at least some of this applies to the girls out there too.

- D

coco

I said it to mine after bout 6-7 months!

Big Chief

a few of you have said it after a week?

either you wanted to get laid or you just cant tell the difference between love and lust..

Big Chief

USE THE FORCE LUKE!! THE FORCE!! *














*apologies but i really wanted to use that last post aswell... no wait, ive been wanting to do it for ages and just could never find a good place for it until now

yossarin

I said it accidently after 3 months and it scared the crap* out of my gf. She returned it after another month.....4 years on we're saying it instead of hello.



*Metaphorically speaking

Typedef

Say it when you mean it.

Don't play any games, because, for me anyway, I don't know when it is I will die, maybe, I'll get killed or maimed in a motor accident or contract a terminal disease tomorrow or (n) random things may happen, and if I died without exponenciating myself and being truthful to myself then I would die a stupid and inhibited man.

My life in such circumstances would be summed up as a list entitled "Things to do", one of which would be to tell the woman I loved that it was so.

However, if you want to play a game with it, then perhaps you are happy to go to your grave, with frivolous interpersonal relationships as a paradigm for your life ™.

I am not, so I don't **** around.

Even if 'she' (or he) doesn't reciprocate, for me, that's not the issue, you, I, one, must live your life as if it was your last day on earth (or at least try to), in case ™ it "does" turn out to be your last day.

Long fingering your self or your feelings is a recipe for a life lived waiting for (n) things to happen.

Tell it to the Grim Reaper kids, I'm done with that, in so far as I can make the decision to do so.

So, for me, what that means is, I follow what I want out of this life and sometimes I fail and sometimes I suceed, but, at the very least, I die (literally) trying.

Heavy posts ™ are a function of barometric pressure.