sex

LegacyUser · 12-02-2003 11:04am #1

OK, this is a short one. Ive been with this girl a month or so and we've slept together but not had proper penetrative sex. she says it's because she's tight and has to be more relaxed and if my (ahem) johnson doesnt go in when she kinda lets it, then it'll just hurt her. then all this in my head puts me off cos I think I'm doing something wrong.

I dunno, it's kinda pissing me off because I think it'd my fault. Is this normal? should I just go ahead and get it in there?

Kell · 12-02-2003 11:19am

Dont go ahead and get in there - under any circumstances. If you want to get in, massage her from head to toe first so she's relaxed. Then you could try running your tongue all over her as well paying particular attention to the erogenous bits, finally winding your way down to where you want to go. Spend quite a bit of time with your tongue in her orifice and if she is not streaming and well lubed at that stage, repeat exercise.

Sorry to be so graphic, but theres no other way really to get the point across -

logic1 · 12-02-2003 11:22am

How old are you?

.logic.

Typedef · 12-02-2003 12:02pm

ralph.

Is this normal?

I'm thinking your girlfriend is, umm, a virgin or perhaps very new to the whole umm penatritive sex thang.

one word... oral.

k?

Kell · 12-02-2003 1:18pm

Typie- if I am that K? and I went a bit overboard, apologies-

Beruthiel · 12-02-2003 1:28pm

Originally posted by Kell
Typie- if I am that K? and I went a bit overboard, apologies-

kell - be calm
he ment k as in okay??

GoneShootin · 12-02-2003 1:56pm

god its only been a month. you horny fecker. give the relationship a chance first before ye reck it. its pointless just slapping IT in there and tearing the bejasus off it.

its far more rewarding when you know how to touch her, where to touch, how best to act around her in those intimate situations. the entire experience can be rose to a higher level if you just give it a bit more time

ya fecking ram

thegills · 12-02-2003 2:05pm

I had this problem years ago with a girl. My foreplay had never been a problem with previous girls but her dryness had always been a problem. If she wants to have sex then you should use a lubricant, KY Jelly perhaps. Some condoms have extra lubrication.
In my case as soon as the in-out started she had no discomfort, well not for the first 55 minutes, then she got some cramps.

Hope it helps.

Mercury_Tilt · 12-02-2003 2:13pm

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The Corinthian · 12-02-2003 2:19pm

The issue is quite likely - surprise, surprise :rolleyes: - to be psychological. It’ll pass the longer you’re in a relationship with her.

In the meantime, muscle relaxants can help (Isobutyl Nitrite, amyl nitrite, butyl nitrite or beer), although I do not endorse the use of any such substances...

Typedef · 12-02-2003 2:25pm

amyl nitrite

Why, is she supposed to be constipated or inexperienced?

Mercury_Tilt · 12-02-2003 2:31pm

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Typedef · 12-02-2003 3:03pm

I'll have to cal toe to your superior knowledge in the area.

haha

Gordon · 12-02-2003 3:14pm

Back on topic:

How old is she? Has she had penetrative sex before?

Thanx 4 The Fish · 12-02-2003 3:18pm

Originally posted by Gordon
Back on topic:

How old is she? Has she had penetrative sex before?

and more importantly does she really want to have sex or does she feel pressured into it ?

Kell · 12-02-2003 5:38pm

Originally posted by Beruthiel
kell - be calm
he ment k as in okay??

Mmmmnnn K.

Kell · 12-02-2003 5:42pm

Originally posted by Mercury_Tilt
Practise on her ass. It might be advisable to get a ruff size of her average dump(a) first. Then do a comparison with your knob(b).

So using some fancy maths.... if b <= a she should be able to take it.

ROFL ROFL LOL LOL. Merc, you still crack me up.

eth0_ · 12-02-2003 5:55pm

Enuff of merc's filthy potty mouth

Seriously, it may not be that she's a virgin as typedef suggested, maybe she very nervous, or may have had a very bad sexual experience before.

maybe you should ask HER before posting about it on here? If you're too embarrased to ask, then maybe you shouldn't be getting down to it just yet....

Mercury_Tilt · 12-02-2003 7:52pm

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Nevyn · 13-02-2003 1:32am

well use ur fingers and if nesscary buy a dildo a slim one.

it will best best to work up to it gradually you wont want to tear or bruise anything.

hope you can make it good and memorible for the both of you .
Nice to know that you are tryin to do thiis right for the both of u instead of getting her drunk and telling her to grit her teeth.

eth0_ · 13-02-2003 10:43am

Originally posted by Mercury_Tilt

I prefer to hit it a good slap tbh but each to his own.

Would that be why I woke up this morning in a bath of ice with a black eye and no kidneys? I mean i've heard of rough sex but...wow.

The Corinthian · 13-02-2003 10:59am

Are you two flirting? :rolleyes:

Typedef · 13-02-2003 11:05am

Look ralph, take some advice and go down on her, ok? Maybe you haven't done this before, if you haven't then, maybe it could be a new experience for you both, if you have done it before then what is the problem in performing said act of oral stimulation again, in the name of umm... stimulation of your partner, leading to better sex for both?

I'm not sure I'd go as far as buying a dildo as Thaed suggests, because, lets face it, the potential to wierd out your inexperienced girlfriend increases exponentially, if you pull out a purple vibrating, battery powered cock, in bed.

Plus, a dildo is a threat to you, she might decide she prefares it, to you, and then where would you be?

DapperGent · 13-02-2003 11:38am

Originally posted by The Corinthian
Are you two flirting? :rolleyes:

Merc appears to be flirting with all the girls of boards.

I reckon he just got dumped.

The Corinthian · 13-02-2003 11:42am

Originally posted by DapperGent
I reckon he just got dumped.

Ahhh... I see - Mercury Jilted.

eth0_ · 13-02-2003 12:02pm

Originally posted by The Corinthian
Ahhh... I see - Mercury Jilted.

Ba doom tish!
I've never met the guy...yet! Maybe our paths will cross at the next boards beer.

smiles · 13-02-2003 12:04pm

Try to be vaguely serious people?

Don't try and force it, you could rip your foreskin if she's not wet enough and you're trying to push your way in.

It might be just that she's not ready.

Have some bloody cop-on, wait until she tells you it's ok, and spent time on foreplay.... lots of foreplay.

<< Fio >>

DapperGent · 13-02-2003 12:13pm

Originally posted by smiles
Don't try and force it, you could rip your foreskin if she's not wet enough and you're trying to push your way in.

Yes your "guide rope" is a delicate bit of equipment and deserves every bit of respect.

Muchos dropping of hand and head is the only way to go. Until you are forcefully instructed to proceed.

catspring · 13-02-2003 12:24pm

first of all, make sure that she's 100% certain that she wants to have sex.
then use some lube (it makes everything soooooo much more fun). i would recomend johnston's baby oil, i think ky jelly gets kinda sticky.
just make sure your both relaxed (though not too much on your part though!!)
and have fun!!!!!

The Corinthian · 13-02-2003 12:28pm

Originally posted by catspring
i would recomend johnston's baby oil

Warning: Baby oil eats latex/condoms.

Mercury_Tilt · 13-02-2003 12:31pm

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Mercury_Tilt · 13-02-2003 12:33pm

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eth0_ · 13-02-2003 12:36pm

WHOAH! Baby oil??? Baby oil and girls insides DO NOT MIX! Not to mention they rot latex!

Smiles - I think he's been given all the advice we can give, he hasn't responded so we're all gettin' antsy

DapperGent · 13-02-2003 12:37pm

What does the KY stand for?

Mercury_Tilt · 13-02-2003 12:44pm

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thedrowner · 13-02-2003 1:15pm

Originally posted by Mercury_Tilt
just use an oil or cream for now. As long as she is lubed etc. Some women have to us KY Jelly. Maybe your mot is one such lady.

way off topic but did anyone see the tommy tiernen sketch about the time his girlfriend let him take her up the ass and he slathered vaseline all over her and him before he realised it was vicks vapo rub!!!! (her: my arse feels like an onion ring!!!!...him: i've got a bloody lightsaber!!!!)

Originally posted by Mercury_Tilt
If you still cant then she has a bigger issue. Because being lubed and being "relaxed" in there are two seperate issues.

yeah...exactly.. she also seems to know what the problem is (a/c to the original post) so she's probably encountered it before and is at least willing to talk about it. try and talk to her a bit more about it to make sure it isn't a psychological thing, rather than a physical thing.

Tazz T · 13-02-2003 1:23pm

On the oil v KY issue. KY is water-based therefore better for condom use and better for your beloved's insides. However, can be a little embarrasssing to buy, since it's not generally used for massage.:)

eth0_ · 13-02-2003 1:41pm

Originally posted by Tazz T
On the oil v KY issue. KY is water-based therefore better for condom use and better for your beloved's insides. However, can be a little embarrasssing to buy, since it's not generally used for massage.:)

I've seen it for sale in Tesco on Baggot st, I was quite surprised!

Tazz T · 13-02-2003 1:55pm

I'll be in there at lunchtime. I'll pick up some with my sarnie

PPC · 13-02-2003 1:59pm

Boots usally sell it too.

catspring · 13-02-2003 3:31pm

Originally posted by eth0_
WHOAH! Baby oil??? Baby oil and girls insides DO NOT MIX! Not to mention they rot latex!

ok, soz, i forgot to mention about condoms and baby oil not being good.
but what do they do to a girls' insides?????
am a weensy bit worried! my precious insides!!! argh....

eth0_ · 13-02-2003 3:42pm

Originally posted by catspring
ok, soz, i forgot to mention about condoms and baby oil not being good.
but what do they do to a girls' insides?????
am a weensy bit worried! my precious insides!!! argh....

Not sure, but if it rots latex think what it could be doing to you! Unless something is specifically stated as being "suitable for internal use" I'd say well away if I were you. Just to be on the safe side.

Kell · 13-02-2003 5:19pm

Originally posted by eth0_
Unless something is specifically stated as being "suitable for internal use" I'd say well away if I were you.

Is that why dil's carry "Suitable for external use only" labels on them?

eth0_ · 13-02-2003 5:42pm

Originally posted by Kell
Is that why dil's carry "Suitable for external use only" labels on them?

I read about that quite recently actually! It's said to cover the manufacturer's ass if it explodes and shoots shrapnel into your ovaries.

The Corinthian · 13-02-2003 5:44pm

Originally posted by eth0_
It's said to cover the manufacturer's ass if it explodes and shoots shrapnel into your ovaries.

How literal did you intend to be in the former part of that sentence?

daire · 13-02-2003 5:52pm

i think all these recommendations are a little extreme. youre probably just not kissing her right (well enough). or maybe youre not being mean enough to her. and if when i say mean you think "what the?" then substitute mean for "nasty". i seem to have riddled this up unintentionally. i hope you 'get it', Ralphy.

eth0_ · 13-02-2003 5:54pm

Originally posted by The Corinthian
How literal did you intend to be in the former part of that sentence?

:-D

Mercury_Tilt · 13-02-2003 6:01pm

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Nevyn · 13-02-2003 10:56pm

Originally posted by Typedef

I'm not sure I'd go as far as buying a dildo as Thaed suggests, because, lets face it, the potential to wierd out your inexperienced girlfriend increases exponentially, if you pull out a purple vibrating, battery powered cock, in bed.

Plus, a dildo is a threat to you, she might decide she prefares it, to you, and then where would you be?

ok there is a differnece between a vibrator and a dildo

and i did suggest a slim one not a huge 12 inch long4 inch girth type thing. They do come in differnt sizes and could be something that they bought together. Viberators should not be used on the inexperinced but nothing beat the real thing so i doubt he'd be booted out of the bed in favour of it.

oil and comdoms are a big no no !

eth0_ · 14-02-2003 12:21pm

Originally posted by Mercury_Tilt
She only does it to tease me Corinthie. I swear. All this ass and exploding in ass stuff.

I got to go lie down now.

*throws a bucket of ice over merc*

Beruthiel · 14-02-2003 12:29pm

Originally posted by eth0_
*throws a bucket of ice over merc*

me thinks he requires a tank of it at this stage!

sex

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