Road Rage (I'll be hung for this one)

McGintyMcGoo · 14-04-2003 12:22pm #1

I'll be hung for this one but ....

A black tarmack road walks into a bar and starts talking to a concrete road. After a few beers the concrete road says "Ere, a bunch of us are heading to that new club, fancy tagging along?"

The black tarmack road says "No mate, I'm a soft surface, I always end up getting my head kicked in." So concrete road says "Don't worry about it, I'm a bit of a hard case, I'll look after you."

Black tarmack road thinks about it for a minute and says "Fair enough, as long as you'll look after me", and off they go. After a few more beers in the club, three red tarmack roads walk in. As soon as he sees them, concrete road hides under the table. The red tarmack roads take one look at black tarmack road and
start kicking him, breaking bottles over his little tarmack head, lamping him with traffic cones, and generally having a laugh.

After a while they get bored and walk out. Black tarmack road pulls his battered tarmack body over to the table and wipes up his tar-based blood and turns to concrete road and says "I thought you were going to look after me."

"I was!" says concrete road, "But those red tarmack roads are f**king cycle paths".

Big Chief · 14-04-2003 12:44pm

let the hanging begin :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Tyrrial · 14-04-2003 12:49pm

i can feel a tar and feathering coming on.......
(it was made me smile a little though

Pugsley · 14-04-2003 1:25pm

...................... may god have mercy on your soul.

Nemici · 14-04-2003 2:51pm

jesus thats great.......really bad but really good

MrB · 14-04-2003 5:18pm

A Jelly Bean walks into a bar and starts talking to a Smartie.
After a few beers the Smartie says, 'Ere, a bunch of us are
heading to that new club - fancy tagging along?'

The Jelly Bean says, 'Sorry mate - I'm a soft centre. I always
end up getting my head kicked in.'
So, the Smartie says, 'Don't worry about that - I'm a bit of a
hard case. I'll look after you.'
The Jelly Bean thinks about it for a minute and says, 'Fair
enough - as long as you'll look after me.' and off they go.

A bit later and after the guys have had a few beers in the
club, threeLockets walk in.

As soon as he sees them, the Smartie hides under the table. The
Lockets take one look at Jelly Bean and start kicking the jelly sh*t
out of him, breaking bottles over his little jelly head, lamping him with
little sugary chairs, and generally having a laugh. After a while they get
bored and walk out.

The Jelly Bean pulls his battered Jelly Bean body over to the
table and wipes his Jelly Bean blood up and turns to the Smartie and
says,'I thought you were going to look after me.'
I was, I was!' says the Smartie, 'but those Lockets are f***ing
menthol."