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The US Navy

  • 15-04-2003 7:03pm
    #1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,414 ✭✭✭


    For any Americans, I apologise in advance for this joke!!

    This is the transcript of an ACTUAL radio conversation between a US Naval ship and the Canadians, off the coast of Newfoundland, October 1995.

    [Radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations, 10th October 1995]

    CANADIANS: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the South, to avoid a collision.

    AMERICANS: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the North, to avoid a collision.

    CANADIANS: Negative, you will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the South, to avoid a collision.

    AMERICANS: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.

    CANADIANS: Negative, I say again, YOU will have to divert your course.

    AMERICANS: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS LINCOLN. THE SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES ATLANTIC FLEET, WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS, AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSALS. I DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH, I SAY AGAIN, 15 DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTERMEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP.

    CANADIANS: We are a lighthouse. Your call.


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,248 ✭✭✭Duffman


    It's an old one.... but still funny :)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 211 ✭✭[Iramus]


    Hey, i remember that exact joke w/ the irish and the brits navy's. LOL though.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,274 ✭✭✭de5p0i1er


    That wouldn't stop them there to pig-headed to let that get in there way.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,888 ✭✭✭nanook


    ahhhh the classic revived once more

    :)


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 92,550 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    Think Peter Ustinov used to tell it with an important bit at the start "Back in the days before radar..."

    Did you know that the U2 spyplane is designed to operate from carriers & the both landings and takeoffs have been done from the Enterprise with a Hercules....


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,146 ✭✭✭SoundWave


    Originally posted by Capt'n Midnight
    [BDid you know that the U2 spyplane is designed to operate from carriers & the both landings and takeoffs have been done from the Enterprise with a Hercules.... [/B]
    i never even knew that they stopped making music.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,403 ✭✭✭passive


    ......
    (pointed silence)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,105 ✭✭✭Tyrrial


    stupid americans...... it's fun to point fingers at a nationality as aposed to accually finding a perticular reason as to why the world is such a ****ed up place!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,315 ✭✭✭ballooba


    Originally posted by Capt'n Midnight
    Did you know that the U2 spyplane is designed to operate from carriers & the both landings and takeoffs have been done from the Enterprise with a Hercules....

    Was there a point to this? :rolleyes:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 410 ✭✭Drazhar


    i guess that Lighthouse is for it after Syria

    "We believe that the large bulb in said terrorist stronghold is in fact a container for various biological weapons. Its flashing on and off is proof that they are testing the various agents on animals, Electric Eels and fireflies we believe. We have here photographic evid............."

    BLAH BLAH BLAH

    Get a job


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