Customer Service

jonno

Just got this in an email don't think it's been posted before. Dunno how true it is (probably hogwash) but it gave me a laugh anyway.

This is a true story from the "WordPerfect Helpline" which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department.
Needless to say, the Help Desk employee was fired however, he is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for "Termination without Cause."

This is the actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (now I know why they record these conversations)

"Rich Hall computer assistance; may I help you?"
"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
"What sort of trouble?"
"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away"
"Went away?"
"They disappeared."
"Hmmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
"Nothing."
"Nothing?"
"It's a blank; it won' t accept anything when I type."
"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
"How do I tell?"
"Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"
"What's a sea-prompt?"
"Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
"Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
"What's a monitor?"
"It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"
"I don't know."
"Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"
"Yes, I think so."
"Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall."
"Yes, it is."
"When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"
"No."
"Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
"Okay, here it is."
"Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
"I can't reach."
"Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"
"No."
"Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"
"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle it's because it's dark."
"Dark?"
"Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."
"Well, turn on the office light then."
"I can't."
"No? Why not?"
"Because there's a power failure."
"A power.......a power failure?.... Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer camein?"
"Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
"Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."
"Really? Is it that bad?"
"Yes, I'm afraid it is."
"Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"
"Tell them you're too f***ing stupid to own a computer."

hells angels

i'd say it a load of shít butt still got a laugh from me!!!

But i wouldn't be surprised if there was someone that stupid out there!!!

John2002

According to this it's fake:

http://www.snopes.com/humor/business/wordperf.htm

Still funny though.

JohnK

you gotta laugh at it

helen_br

Originally posted by John2002
According to this it's fake:
http://www.snopes.com/humor/business/wordperf.htm
Still funny though.

Well actually it says it's almost true - only the bit after the 'problem' is diagnosed is fake. How the snopes people can have the nerve to put FALSE in big red letters at the top of the page given what follows is beyond me.

Don1

It could be real. eg if it was in America!!!!!!

TomTom

I don't care if it's real or fake, i made me laugh.

TomTom

theres lots of these type stories on http://www.techtales.com/tftechs.html

An example of one is:
I got a call one morning from a user who was having trouble reading a floppy and insisted that her drive was bad. The explained to me that she had copied files to her brand new disk the night before and now her computer wouldn't read the disk. Dead floppy drives are nothing new to me, so I grabbed a new one and a screwdriver and set off for her cubicle. I sat down and tried to access the drive. It made the most god-awful sound I have ever heard, so I popped the disk out and looked at it. The label is STAPLED to the disk. (I kid you not.. RIGHT through the center) When I asked her about it she explained to me that she had not been able to make the label stick so she stapled it. Then she asked me if that was bad. (!) Oh, and the reason the label didn't stick is because she hadn't removed the backing from the adhesive.

Pugsley

rofl at both them stories

Acidflash

lol tom tom