HillBilly Medical Terms

Pompey Magnus

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Hillbilly Medical Terms

Benign ................ What you be after you be eight.

Bacteria ............... Back door to cafeteria.

Barium ................. What you do with dead folks.

Cesarean Section ....... A neighborhood in Rome.

Catscan ................ Searching for the cat.

Cauterize .......... Made eye contact with her.

Colic ............... A sheep dog.

Coma ............... A punctuation mark.

D&C ................ Where Washington is.

Dilate ............. To live longer than your kids do.

Enema ............. Not a friend.

Fester ............ Quicker than someone else.

Fibula ............ A small lie.

G.I.Series ......... World Series of military baseball.

Hangnail ........... What you hang your coat on.

Impotent ........... Distinguished, well known.

Labor Pain .......... Getting hurt at work.

Morbid .............. A higher offer than I bid.

Nitrates ............ Cheaper than day rates.

Medical Staff ....... A Doctor's cane, sometimes shown with a snake.

Node .................... I knew it.

Outpatient .............. A person who has fainted.

Pap Smear ................ A fatherhood test.

Pelvis ................... Second cousin to Elvis.

Post Operative ........... A letter carrier.

Recovery Room .... Place to do upholstery.

Secretion ....... Hiding something.

Tablet .......... A small table to change babies on.

Seizure .......... Roman emperor who lived in the Ceasarean Section.

Terminal Illness .... Getting sick at the train station.

Tumor ............... More than one.

Urine ............... Opposite of mine.

Varicose ............ Near by.

Hospital ............ The biggest building in town, other than Ed's feed warehouse.

de5p0i1er

Nice to know that ppl are educated in basic medical knowledge the world over.

skittishkitten

As with all things in the south some of these have more than one meaning



Catscan ................ cats toilet

Ceasarean Section..... section of the salad bar

Fester ............ Something you do when your real angry

Seizure .......... What the cops do when they grab the still

Urine ............... I'm out.

Hospital ............ Place where they have the cafeteria

Spenguin

Heh heh, funniest jokes in the humour section.

Pugsley

Castration - when someone kicks your sister in the jaw.......

:eek: