44 Next Birthday -I am bored with my Life

Realistically, you are too old to be considering having kids.

Regardless of age, getting "married" and having kids is probably not going to solve your problems.

Take advantage of your freedom and do something exciting and "scary," for you. Can you take time off work and travel, work abroad ... ??

(Edit)

Shake it up, your world will change around you.

You are not old or unhealthy physically.

In what century 🙄 there's no biological issues, men can become fathers way beyond 44,

OP have you tried counseling? Sounds like you need a helping hand to get out of this rut and build your confidence.

Start exercising. I know that's not what you want to hear, but it's vitally important for the way you perceive yourself, as much as for your weight. If you're self-conscious about exercise, then do it at night when nobody will see you. Put on a podcast/playlist you like, and get out for a long walk.

You'll lose weight, and you'll feel better about yourself because you will have done something. Added bonus is that you'll end up drinking less if you're regularly our walking instead, which in turn leads to further weight loss, which then leads to you feeling ever better about yourself. Easy, simple and actionable steps that you can take today, that will make a meaningful difference.

Do this first, and then worry about making connections. You need to start caring for yourself before you can expect others to.

you can wait for something to happen or make it happen, the choice is yours

There are plenty of sports that still do aul fellas training all of the time. A few weeks back I saw a competitive soccer match taking place in Marlay Park and some of those lads were north of 40, or at least looked it! Plenty of bellies and wrinkles going on.

https://www.amateurfootballleague.com/

Even without teams, you can still have a social aspect - cycling, golf, running. Cliches, definitely, but if you don't like them, there's rowing or tennis, whatever. When it comes to sport, people tend to write themselves off, it's not that the opportunities aren't available.

At his age, free time is his greatest asset. He can turn up to training and competitions when everyone around him can only make a few. Not only is this key to improving his fitness, but will make him a top choice of player for his reliability.

Unhelpful and untrue.

OP - it sounds like you need to come up with a plan. Start small and work up to bigger things. You can have purpose in your life without a relationship or kids. You need to tackle the self esteem and alcohol issues first, currently this is a vicious cycle as you're probably using alcohol to numb feelings whether you're aware of that or not. Where there's an unhealthy relationship with alcohol there's an acronym for why we generally drink - HALT - Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired. The idea being that when you want to drink, you "halt" and identify which one(s) it is. If you could think of one action to counteract each one of these things, and do them regularly that would be a great start.

There are loads of football teams, tennis clubs etc that have provisions for those in the OPs category.. this and many contributions of yours in this thread are very wide of the mark and inaccurate.

Nonsense. 5 a side footie, Tag Rugby, Tennis Club, Golf society, badminton etc etc... Full of people of all ages, sizes and ability. All great ways to meet new people as well as exercise.

If one has lower self-esteem, it may have been a background reason for not wanting relationship, because if one does not trust himself, how he/she can expect someone else to do so and choose to live with such person for rest of her/his respective lifes, or even have kids together?

I am 45, I am running in between 40 - 100km per month, I have motorbike, I am going for indoor climbing and for many more activities ON MY OWN too.

There is nothing wrong being on your own or doing things on your own.

What is wrong "to know that you actually do what you know should not do" - drinking alone, and playing Playstation are fine examples of such...

Your change must come from inside out. There is no one else able to change your life permanently, except you. And it is also solely your life, hence solely your responsibility.

Don't overestimate your initial targets. For example: Go for 15 min brisk walk or so every day straight after work, each day stop in coffee shop (ideally different places) and get a bottle of water / tea / coffee, exchange few words with cashier about weather and move on... Weather is getting better so give it a try and maybe start tomorrow, even if not working...

Definitely choose pretty small steps, write your reasons for why to do something like that brisk walk and also write reasons for what not to do (like TRY not to drink on your own - this one may be harder than it looks) on piece of paper and leave it in your wallet or on your fridge, whatever... AND every time you struggle to figure out what to do, use your manual to choose / avoid certain ones. Tell someone about it (siblings, etc...), if you have good relations with them. They may give you a motivational boost when your initial enthusiasm fade away (yes, it happens)...

Professional advise from online support will be beneficial at the time of planning these changes as it saves you from making mistakes at implementing change into your life, (VHI or whatever your employer HR may have on their portal, it is confidential and outsourced, so people answering the phone wont recognize you), it was mentioned here before by many others for same reasons, I believe...

As you mentioned that you are slightly overweight, consult your future hobbies with health proffesional, as cold water may be dangerous to people with weaker arterias (biggest blood vessels connected directly to hearth) or arterias clogged up by fat from unhealthy food...

If you are given OK for above examples or any other activities , try to challenge yourselves with something like 30sec cold (only cold tap) shower every morning for 7 days and see how it goes. There is release of small amount of good hormones after body is exposed to cold water for reasonable time, this may help you to feel better right from the start of your day... magic will happen in both your confidence for continuously doing something good for yourselves and also your body will get used of benefits from regular cold shower and brisk walks, whatever... If you manage 30sec for week, go for 45sec next week.

Do not hurt yourselves by trying something like dip into ocean because someone on Boards (or on Youtube) said cold exposure can change your life. It has changed mine.

I do not wish you good luck in improving your life, because it is not based on luck, but on dedication. So I end it up with "May the Force be with you!"

Grow your own vegetables, go foraging for mushrooms (in a group), go fishing, hill walking, visit archaeology sites. Travel.....plan the big trip, maybe go on a group excursion.

There are a huge number of Facebook pages out there dedicated to all kinds of activities. You will meet all types of helpful and knowledgeable people.

44yrs old isn't middle age, would ya get a grip ffs. Plus if you have nothing positive to add/offer the OP, dont bother posting negative rubbish.

"At 44 too, the options are very limited for playing team sports. Most competitive players are long retired by that age. Starting out at 44 would be unlikely to work out at all, if he is even accepted. Most sports are focused around young people and on training them up in the game as teenagers, not middle age"

The ignorance in this post is astounding. You really don't have a clue what you're talking about.

It always amazes me how people get away with ageism and yet if they put a person down for their gender or colour of their skin they'd be banned. I had children in my 40s and I played soccer all through my early 40s, and still play astro park every weekend (touching 50 now) with another 16 or 18 guys all in their 40s and some are in their 50s, and many of them never played football before their 40s, shock horror. We are all different and you have no right to put anyone in a box because of their age, it's small minded and bigoted.

As for the OP, find out what interests you, doesn't have to be a physical sport if that's not what you are into, for example I love playing Chess. I plan to join my local Chess club soon, just haven't got around to it yet. Or as one poster said, volunteer for a tidy's town or charity. I know you said you are an introvert but humans are social creatures and even if it's one evening a week you will feel better if you are interacting with others.