RTE Radio 1: The Ryan Tubridy Show

Absolute gibberish for 20 minutes and counting now...

omg me and my friends were just doing the chariots of fire slo mo run just yesterday, it's like this show speaks directly to me

I don't think he would be that loose.

There is a Universe where Ryan Tubridy never existed....

What an amazing place that must be.....

Dipped in for the first half hour and that was bad, imagine getting paid for just talking shite about your day before.

He reminds me of a bloke who i used to work with, who put no effort or pride into any thing he did, and if you asked him is this finished or are you going to finish that, his answer was always...... Fcuk it it'll do

That's tubs in a nutshell

Riffed to 09:28 yesterday

Riffed to 09:27 today.

The riffing used to stop between 09:15-09:20. Obviously now struggling for content, so has decided to ramble on longer.

And most of his riffing surrounds things he was able to do when his working day finishes before noon, despite the rest of the population having to do a full day. I wish I could stop working at noon or before, and head off for a walk and a 99, before heading home to watch my film of choice. Or read the back of a few books, catch up on their reviews and then pretend I've read them.

Good to hear that "it looks like my trip to Iceland is finally going to happen", to quote him this morning. I wonder who is finally stumping up to pay for this trip? He mentioned it ad nauseum for a couple of years to try to drop the hint, rather than just dipping into his own substantial wealth.

Some of us hard working people depend on RT for his riffin and we sit there in our offices imagining what it would be like to have feck all to do all day. Today during a call for example, my mind drifted to far away dun laoghaire pier, where i pictured myself eating a 99 and riffin with the fans about kindness, then it's off to kilney on the vespa, hair blowing in the wind and the smell of delicious leather, after i imagine myself buying delicious truffles , my mind would whisk me away to an empty cinema where although the movie is aimed slightly over my head i can picture myself telling the audience that i'd like to travel to the location it was set. Then i imagine finshing off the day having a gentle one off the wrist whilst browsing RIP.ie

Yep. It's very hard to argue against Ryan 'The IcK' Tubridy being a real piece of shít.

That pales in comparison to this:

"Bryan reached for his favourite bottle of delicious fizzy pop to accompany his favourite packet of delicious Irish crisps as he unzipped his delicious pantaloons to have a delicious wa_k over his delicious collection of delicious Macca albums and other delicious freebies. When he eventually arrived at a delicious climax he used some of his favourite delicious tissues to clean the delicious mess before retiring to his delicious bed for a delicious snooze before rising in the ‘morn to work deliciously hard for 50ish or so delicious minutes. After this deliciously hard task he popped onto his delicious Vespa for a delicious drive on the delicious coast road to delicious Dun Laoghaire to have a delicious 99 at the delicious Teddy’s. Bryan deliciously waited in the the delicious queue in the delicious hope that a delicious bystander would deliciously pay for his delicious desire. Rather undeliciously, no-one was willing to pay for his delicious delicacy that day and so Bryan had to deliciously dip into his own delicious wallet to pay for the delicious delicacy himself. It sadly was not a delicious day."

People on the thread are capable of these fantasies, and of talking in their heads to an imaginary Bryan. Yet they cannot envisage any of the 366,000 listeners being able to compose texts about being happy.

He said it again!

Sounds gorgeous. But wait....you would actually pay for your own truffles?!

i'm a little put out i've been omitted from this list

did we ever formally pitch the idea to RTE about the show idea of tubs driving people to their oncology appointments?

Not sure, but I might just have cracked it here

It looks like Ryan is actually a Nexus-6 Replicant - (Physical-D, Mental-B, - serial number N6MAA10216) bio-engineered by The Tyrell Corporation

There were various models of the Nexus-6 Replicant produced – ‘Self-sufficient Combat model’, ‘Basic Pleasure model’ and a few experimental ‘Basic Presenter models’ were engineered - (while the 'presenter' variants were proven to be extremely unreliable and incredibly annoying, they retained their ability to be completely devoid of all emotions/self awareness and were thus considered a minor success by The Tyrell Corporation)

Just one 'Presenter model' was deployed in a trial to entertain workers on a remote space colonisation station but it was obliterated in a freak accident involving an industrial laser rock cutting machine after just 14 minutes of its first broadcast

Of the ‘Basic Presenter models’, only serial number N6MAA10216 remains unaccounted for (retired) and is believed to be somewhere in western Europe

Some of the later Nexus-7 Replicants were rather fecking tasty -

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Just a quicky on the creative writing discussion. Absolutely nothing wrong with posters exercising their creative writing skills - it's a very healthy thing to do. Most readers understand the satire well enough, although Chakra Blue doesn't really do satire as they mentioned - "Callan and comedy shouldnt be used in the same sentence!!!!" - in the Oliver Callan thread so I think Mrs Browns boyz might be a runner there.

Anyway, the whole thread took a very strange turn when the fairly blatant trolling started.

How anyone that watched Ryan hijack Charlie Bird's climb, turn it into a Ryan gig and still think he's a good guy, is beyond me frankly.

I’m not a huge callan fan but when he has an axe to grind he’s brilliant ie ray darcy 😂

(That wasn’t the main taking from your post, the replicant theory will now send me down a tubridy YouTube rabbit hole to analyse his behaviour and look for signs)