Buying Alcohol for 17yo Daughter.

Wombatman · 26-05-2022 3:46pm #1

Daughter turned 17 at beginning of May. Going to house party tomorrow night. Wants me to buy drink (750ml bottle of Bacardi) for her. What's my play?

o1s1n · 26-05-2022 3:48pm

Not a chance my parents would have bought me booze for a party under the age of 18.

Kimbot · 26-05-2022 3:51pm

Whatever about a few drinks but a near litre bottle of bacardi would destroy her.

26-05-2022 3:52pm

750ml of liquor? That's a lot, even for me and I'm a 6'4" 16 stone man.

Get her those Bacardi Breezers or something light.

o1s1n · 26-05-2022 3:53pm

Actually I originally read the OP as a 750ml bottle of Bacardi alcopop type of thing, like Breezer.

750ml of actual Bacardi rum? Jaysus :eek:

Smee_Again · 26-05-2022 3:58pm

If you're OK with her having a drink then get her a naggin, if you buy her a bottle you're also buying drink for a few of her friends whose parents might not appreciate that.

Panthro · 26-05-2022 4:02pm

Is WKD still a thing. Or fat frogs.

Good heavens the sugar intake.

Do not buy an entire bottle of rum for a 17yr old. 4 pack of bacardi breezers and pick em up half hour early.

SEPT 23 1989 · 26-05-2022 4:04pm

They seem to start on spirits now no cans or flagons of cider which is a pity for their livers

its a lot of drink for a 17 year old girl to polish off herself

goldenmick · 26-05-2022 4:05pm

The fact you're even considering it is poor parenting, and an equally poor example to be setting.

She's plenty of time to start on the demon drink when she's 18. Those who start before that age tend to get the taste for alcohol too young, when can lead to problems in their adult life. Many who refrain from underage drinking (especially women) tend to not even bother at all with drink once past 18.

Jequ0n · 26-05-2022 4:06pm

She’ll get her hands on it one way or another. Might be a good opportunity to discuss the party and what other people are bringing.

Growing up my friends and I were all allowed to drink, and our parents got us alcohol too. It wasn’t a taboo and I think it was a healthier attitude than the secret teenage drinking culture you sometimes find here.

Kimbot · 26-05-2022 4:10pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119117883#Comment_119117883

I was allowed drink before I was 18, a few cans every now and then. I done me no harm and in regards to drinking now I rarely drink anymore.

goldenmick · 26-05-2022 4:14pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119117908#Comment_119117908

An odd can of beer is one thing. A 750ml bottle of Bacardi is quite another.... especially when it's for a young girl.

Kimbot · 26-05-2022 4:15pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119117921#Comment_119117921

Completely agree but you didnt specify that in your post just a generalization from what I can see.

26-05-2022 4:15pm

A litre of spirits is potentially lethal for an adult weighing up to 60kg. Just saying.

Atlantic Dawn · 26-05-2022 4:15pm

750ml on her own is over 20 pub measures, it would have me in a dangerous way of an evening and I am drinking 20 plus years.

Jequ0n · 26-05-2022 4:16pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119117921#Comment_119117921

She is planning on bringing it to a party which means it will be shared.

Xterminator · 26-05-2022 4:16pm

discuss what a reasonable drinking amount is, and that's what you get. remember when you were that age, you drank, and the more sensible approach is to keep the lines of communication open, rather than laying down the law.

rum doesnt come in 750ml bottles, it comes in 700 ml bottles. so i hope its a Bacardi breezer type alcopop she is looking for . i would buy 3 x small bottles (275ML). my thinking is it will help her pace herself. no way would i be giving her enough alcohol to hospitalize her, and thats what a bottle of run could do.

Kimbot · 26-05-2022 4:24pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119117935#Comment_119117935

https://www.crownwineandspirits.com/bacardi-superior-white-rum-750ml/

o1s1n · 26-05-2022 4:28pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119117968#Comment_119117968

Christ, their tag line really is a load of waffle isn't it?

'It is classic Bacardi rum, the soul of the Bacardi brand - youthful, high-quality, sociable, sensual and passionate.'

goldenmick · 26-05-2022 4:28pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119117932#Comment_119117932

And all the other will be bringing drink, and sharing theirs as well.

It's the OP's choice what he chooses to do. It's his daughter after all.

No way I would have let either of my daughters be taking whole bottles of spirits to parties at that age. Like posters before have said, a bottle or two of diluted "breezers" would be the limit - that's if she insists on taking booze along.

OP needs to have a chat with her about the real dangers of hard alcohol such as Bacardi. After all, he has no idea what sort of crowd are going to be at this party.

CreadanLady · 26-05-2022 4:28pm

You are better off buy it for her, at least then you know what she will be drinking. If you refuse, well she will just get drink and/or drugs off someone else and god knows what it will be or what will be in it. Could be spiked drinks being given out by fellas or anything. There is an epidemic of spike rapes the since the covid parties started.

RojaStar · 26-05-2022 4:43pm

Leaving aside the fact that she is underage, I would say an outright NO to a full bottle of Bacardi. She is really chancing her arm there IMO as I cannot imagine m(any) other parents agreeing to that.

Definitely a conversation needed to be had about drinking in general, this is a critical age for the relationship with alcohol to develop in a healthy or unhealthy way.

OP you need to take as much control of this situation as possible (again IMO). If you're going to get anything, get low ABV cans of mixed drinks. I think Bacardi might even have some. And for the love of God arrange a time to collect her.

ETA these for example: https://www.tesco.ie/groceries/en-IE/products/305966231 or White Claw which is what all the cool 20 somethings are drinking.

Jequ0n · 26-05-2022 4:44pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119117990#Comment_119117990

It depends entirely on the party and the people going. The OP is lucky enough that their daughter asked and raised the topic so they can discuss it.

Nothing worse than secret drinking/ drug taking because your parents are unwilling to discuss reality.

HazeDoll · 26-05-2022 4:46pm

You're obviously thinking about doing it OP, so here's what I'd say:

"I don't want you drinking at this age. A few weeks ago you were only sixteen, you're too young to spend a night drinking. Still, I want you to have a good night. So here's what we can agree on. I'll buy you a Barcadi Breezer or two. But you need to give me your word now that this is all you'll drink apart from water or Coca-Cola.

I'll pick you up from the party at X o'clock. That's non-negotiable. I won't come in looking for you and I won't embarrass you but I will be outside the house at X o'clock and you need to be in the car by ten past X o'clock. If we can't agree on these then I'm afraid I can't let you go to the party."

OP, do you know the people whose house she's going to? Will there be adults there?

And I'm sorry to bring this up but you need to have a very serious talk with her about contraception and STDs before events overtake you.

is_that_so · 26-05-2022 4:53pm

The OP seems open to allowing the kid to have a drink but a full bottle is definitely not a route to go. As suggested by others a limited number of bottles of something like Breezers (2 at most) may be the better call and allows for potentially a little more parental control over the drinking habits.

Akrasia · 26-05-2022 5:00pm

Kids her age would be pissed after 3/4 cans of beer. if she measures the spirits wrong, she could be passed out drunk within an hour of getting there. You might trust your daughter, do you trust the other people at the party to take care of her if she passes out?

Or what if another kid decides to show off that he/she can hold their drink and ends up getting hammered on the bacardi you paid for and something happens to them. It would be partially your fault

akelly02 · 26-05-2022 5:10pm

get her a shoulder .

if its just herself then a 750mm is wayyy too much.

I suspect there is 2 or 3 of them in it though.

26-05-2022 5:13pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119117873#Comment_119117873

Spirits will be better for their livers unless they go so far as alcohol poisoning.

2L 6% cider is 120ml of pure alcohol. 350ml of Vodka at 37.5% is 131ml of alcohol. Body has to process it no matter what. You'll be way more pissed after a shoulder of vodka than 2L of cider. Long-term though it's mostly about total units so aside from the few who hospitalise themselves most would be better off on spirits.

CreadanLady · 26-05-2022 5:17pm

Don't let her go to the party if there are going to be fellas there and if there is no supervision there. We all know how that ends. Everyone drunk off their heads. Something bad happens. There is an investigation. Everyone is telling a completely different version of events and there was so much drink on board that no-ones statement to Gardai is credible.

Still stihl waters 3 · 26-05-2022 5:18pm

I read recently that females under 30 are the highest sufferers of liver damage due to them being unable to process alcohol the same as males their age, also more likely to end up on a liver transplant list during their 30s due to alcohol abuse, young girls cannot drink the same as their male peers due to their inability to process alcohol the same way, absolute madness buying that much alcohol for a 17 year old imo, the time to educate them about responsible drinking is not when they're 17

Hooked · 26-05-2022 5:18pm

Lads n lassies... We nearly all drank at 15 and up. At 17 - I'd expect everyone is drinking.

The fact you know she is drinking and she's asking you - is a positive in my opinion. My auld lad left us drink from 16. Figured it was better we were at it under his roof than bush drinking. But it was always cans. And I'm 44 now - so that's a solid 28 years ago! Christ!!! Seems like yesterday.

Kids these days are different. Its all spirits and cocktails. As others have said - the 750ml is for a gang of them - and she'll be the cool kid with the cool (mam/dad) who got it for her. Which, isn't cool. At least not for their parents.

I'd be ok with buying my 17 yr old (BTW I've no kids) a few beers or bacardi breezers. But not spirits. But remember... if you don't someone else probably will. Time to have the chat and meet half way I think.

Buying Alcohol for 17yo Daughter.

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