How much to put in for wedding nowadays

Just decline the invite like I do for 99% of weddings even friends weddings, you only really need to go to your siblings weddings. I have lost a few so called friends over this but they obviously weren't good friends to begin with, I always give a good present if I get an invite and dont go. This still isn't enough for some people and they cut contact soon after.

Seriously 150!? I hope that was a pool for a colleague?

Hijacking....but what would be the going rate for a wedding party? Friends, not family. They're having a small family only wedding and then a party the following night. A great way to do it, in my opinion. But dunno how much to give.

You only give what you can afford. We have been lucky in life. Both herself and myself have good businesses and we look after as many people as we can. My staff are paramount and always get taken care of, babies, marriages, new homes, issues etc. Family get taken care of, as you would expect. My own family come first, by that I mean my kids, my brothers, sisters, nephews, nieces and the cousins etc. Family for us is the only thing in life. We have a large family and a huge circle of very good friends. We are blessed!

have always been a believer in look after people correctly and they look after you.

should herself and myself decide to tie the knot, it’ll be a massive shindig…but… I do not want anything from anyone, I just want them to be there to share and enjoy themselves.

Yeah, I'm one of those who doesn't give anything at weddings. You're inviting me, if you're only inviting me because you want me to bring money, then don't invite me. I'm not going to stop anyone giving money if they want, but this expectation is crazy.

+1. One of my cousins got married a few weeks ago, invited 300 got about 180 guests. Big fancy wedding which cost about 50k. I didn't go as I am not close to this cousin, have not seen them since 1998 but sent a nice note and card with my RSVP. No money in it though! (If I was going I'd have put maybe 150 in max).

Cousin was probably relying on better attendance and gifts to pay for the wedding, stories have been filtering back about complaints that aunty Anne 'only' gave a thousand and that brother David got strips torn off him because he didn't hand over the money early enough.

Sad really.

I'm not sure what he means by "a family of four". Will all four people be putting in their share, or is it a couple and their two children?

In the latter case, maybe €200 for the brother-in-law (assuming it's his wife's brother), and €100 for anyone else is more than enough.

Always makes me laugh when people bitch and moan about the cost of going to a wedding. If you resent being invited, then just don't go.

Why do you worry about what it's costing them?

They decided to have their wedding in Ireland, it may be costing them so they want it and can most likely therefore afford it.

Why do you think you're responsible for the costs?

If you mean give someone then I think €100 is more than enough.

I used to only give 50 Euro.

Maybe people should stick a box in the corner where people can put an envelope with cash anonymously and give the card separately. That way no one needs to be embarrassed if they can only give a small amount.

They're my thoughts about weddings nicely summed up right there BD3. Complete racket. Lived in Oz for years weddings over at 10pm beer and wine covered so no wallet needed (unless u didn't like what was on offer) people who wanted to keep going headed out elsewhere. None of this 2 day stuff.

As my cousin said to me. "Imagine you go into a hotel on sunday for 3 course lunch with your family, its €30 per head", "then go over to the manager and ask him if I brought 200 people down here how much a head could you do it for" Manager says €80 and your left scratching your head.

That's a great idea!

That's it. People getting married expect to earn a lot of it back via presents. Just don't have a massive expensive wedding, you're not that important!

One of my friends got married a few years back. Civil ceremony, 20 people max, cost very little and over in 20 minutes (including photos!) and happened at 4pm. In the restaurant for 5pm, finished by 6.30pm. Back to the hotel penthouse for a small party of <40 total. Hotel even threw in a staff member to hand out free drink for a few hours. BYOB after that, or down to the bar to get some sent up. He said overall, including the free drink and free meal for everyone, the whole day cost them <€5000.

And as someone else pointed out, the whole wedding day is very expensive, even as a guest. Madness to then be expected to fork over more money just because... As I said initially, if you're only inviting me because you hope I bring money, then don't invite me. The days of helping out like that are over, gone. It's not necessary anymore and any money people make from a wedding probably won't cover half the cost anyway, such are the notions of Irish people getting married...

Definitely nothing, because it most likely is already costing more than a non-family wedding. Why should I? They earn more than me.

I don't agree with giving money for these things. It should never be about the money. You're inviting me to celebrate your wedding, not to line your pockets. I'd imagine the people who are upset about not getting money from someone they invited to their wedding, are the same people who get upset because you didn't get them anything for their 27th birthday.

Any time I've ever hosted anything, solo or during those rare times as a couple, I paid for everything. Food, drink, venue, etc. I didn't, nor would I ever, expect anyone to give me money, nor would I get upset if someone didn't.

Greed, selfishness and expectation are what put people here. And continuing it, while the price of everything expect my wage soars, is just madness. Same as the yanks expecting you to tip as standard. Stupid passing of the issue onto others.