Are you glad you were born?

sporina · 26-07-2022 9:51pm #1

Was in company recently.. and this topic came up.. about how the fact that we wer born was like winning the lottery..

What say you - you glad your here?

Me? i'm 50/50.. could take or leave life.. tis hard.. but lots of beauty to be enjoyed too..

Leg End Reject · 26-07-2022 10:34pm

I'm glad, life isn't a bed of roses all the time, but I've great memories, family and friendships. It sure beats the abyss of nothingness and it's short, treasure it and keep your head down through the hard times.

Gant21 · 26-07-2022 10:42pm

I’m Ukrainian well that’s what they say.

Multipass · 26-07-2022 10:44pm

Nope, and I didn’t ask for it either 😂

Sunny_Arms · 27-07-2022 2:54am

Sometimes I am but there are more times that I'm not. It mostly depends on the situation I'm currently in.

Atlantic Dawn · 27-07-2022 3:36am

...

SuperBowserWorld · 27-07-2022 4:39am

Yes, but lots of soul destroying problems to deal with everyday that I could have avoided, but I was naive, and ignorant.

But it was a different time and culture and I couldn't Google solutions. Also, maybe I'd have a different set of problems.

I love life, nature and the world. It **** kills me that we are destroying the place for our children and for other life.

And I'm surrounded by people and leaders who don't get this or care. We are supposed to be intelligent life.

sporina · 27-07-2022 6:01am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119392196#Comment_119392196

how do you know it beats the abyss of nothingness? you wouldn't know if you weren't born...

27-07-2022 8:26am

Back in the time when I would have even considered an answer to that question - the answer would have been a strong no.

I was a lay about waster with a bad diet and worse physical health - few friends - no luck with women - full on ripe fruit for the aggressive INCEL movement or some other cult or terrorist group if they had managed to get their hands on me and given me a feeling of hope or belonging.

While not full on suicidal I was certainly in that "Hope when I go asleep tonight I do not wake up tomorrow" head space.

I woke up to myself and took some strong steps to change all that though. And over the years I have certainly adopted the "Accept and put aside what you can not control - and focus on what you can" stoicism mentality. Which means that the question of asking myself whether I am glad to be alive or not is not even a question I would really consider.

But I've found the best diet - physical health plan - friends - relationships - life pursuits - and head space - for me. I am as content and regularly happy as I think I am capable of being. So I am in a great place and happy to continue on as life throws the curve balls and challanges.

sporina · 27-07-2022 9:05pm

@[Deleted User] go you.. and twas a pleasure to read your post.. v honest and sincere..

but are you glad you wer born? do you feel it an honour?

Leg End Reject · 27-07-2022 9:08pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119392526#Comment_119392526

No I wouldn't, but I'm glad I was born and know it now.

Xander10 · 27-07-2022 9:14pm

If I wasn't then I wouldn't have an opinion.

But since I am, I hate it goes by so fast. Hate the thought of being buried and rotten away ( even though I will know nothing of it). Hate you don't get a second chance, it would be be so much better.

But while I am reasonably fit, just intend to enjoy the remainder. Will hate being sick and on the way out

No easy answer to this I suppose.

AllForIt · 27-07-2022 9:18pm

I rather think of this question as am I glad our existence is a thing at all, for everyone not just me.

It's a toughy. I don't have enough information to make a decision.

wotzgoingon · 27-07-2022 9:19pm

I wish I was dead. I might off myself one of the days. I was born an accident too so I wasn't suppose to be here. I'm also the black sheep of the family.

SnuggyBear · 27-07-2022 10:33pm

I'm not sure. Your young days are good but as you get older it's a load of bollocks isn't it? The world doesn't have much wonder to me anymore.

Mad_maxx · 27-07-2022 10:38pm

It's an interesting question, I'll answer it this way

I wouldn't mind if I had never been born

KilOit · 27-07-2022 10:38pm

Very bleak future ahead for most of us imo. I had an amazing childhood and 20's I did loads but damn the world is getting dark these days

cavan4sam · 27-07-2022 10:40pm

Good question... Some days you're the pigeon... Some days you're the statue

So I guess it's a yes and no answer... It can't all be good

KoolKid · 27-07-2022 10:40pm

Absolutely not. Of all the galaxy's and all the stars and all the planets in the universe I had to be born on this ggod forsaken planet that's full of hatred where everyone hates everyone else and the billionairesewont use their money to help others

KilOit · 27-07-2022 10:55pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119397109#Comment_119397109

All the billionaires in America and their cities are like this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gEIA3PRGQlU&ab_channel=SBCNews

KoolKid · 27-07-2022 11:04pm

The world is fucked. The one percent of the richest in the world have the resources to sort it all out. But Greed prevails. The biggest problem with the world isn't that the poor dont have enough. It's that the rich don't have enough.

gary550 · 27-07-2022 11:18pm

I've far from an easy life but man what a joy it is to experience life, all the good and all the bad.

hate to give a motivational shpeel but what a f*cking sin it would be for me to waste it and not leave a positive mark on the world, even if small. If there is an afterlife just imagine facing your ancestors who hard laboured themselves to an early till death, faced a life of comparable misery so you could be here living in one of the easiest times in human history only to tell them "poor me, life was hard and I was permanently miserable because of one thing or another". The most amazing thing about life, which I don't think many have realised is if you don't like yours you can change it.

As long as I'm here, I'm going to make the most of it.

If you're da had of sneezed when he was riding your ma you wouldn't here, it's truly a gift.

27-07-2022 11:27pm

God, Yes.

Once my teens were finished, life started improving gradually, building up momentum, and honestly, I love my life now. I'm not wealthy, borderline comfortable with few real needs. Have managed to travel/live extensively abroad, and I'm set to head off again soon for another decade or perhaps more.

Life is bloody brilliant. Plenty of pain in life, but that's there to make the joys so much more obvious.

Strumms · 28-07-2022 2:11am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119397179#Comment_119397179

The world is fûcked because in every country the rich are untouchable and they’ve volunteered the squeezed middle classes to sort out all the problems, whereby they / we get taxed to fûck in relation to our income and on our purchases and get very little back in return…. We are actually asked to pay again, often… for the likes of healthcare etc.

am I glad I was born, pretty much, life has been 9/10 so I’m not complaining, I’ve experienced immense joy, happiness and yet challenges too but it’s good…and getting better.

I enjoy my life..deal much better with adversity and challenges, filter out fuçkwits with greater efficiency and have fun.

Pissy Missy · 28-07-2022 7:21am

Despite all the crap I've been through, I'm glad I've survived and keep on fighting the good fight, hoping better days are to come

Pissy Missy · 28-07-2022 7:27am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119396739#Comment_119396739

Keep fighting, several of us were born accidents in our family like plenty others, and no one is perfect, we've all fecked up in some way or another, look forward to the future and find goals to work towards and positive distractions, seek help if things are getting worse

28-07-2022 7:42am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119396674#Comment_119396674

Well as I said - I do not think of it in those terms. The fact I was born is in the stoicism category of things out of my control. So I do not see it in positive or negative terms so much as I see it as part of the framework I operate in. The things I can change or control I look at in positive and negative terms.

So I am neutral on the question. But I am content in my life - frequently happy - and bring a lot of happiness to my girlfriends - our children - my friends - and some people in my community. So I guess by inference I guess the answer to your questions is a "yes" even though I would not myself give that answer either way.

In life I subscribe to the notion that "The journey is the destination". So the question itself feels to me like asking if I am happy I arrived - when I still see myself as being on the journey. If that makes any sense :)

boardlady · 28-07-2022 9:45am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119397233#Comment_119397233

I haven't read on down yet, but I had to stop here - You are the first positive post i've read and there was me thinking ... 'am I going to post and be the only sound-of-music here??' Definitely, life on earth is no picnic and I agree that the human species is largely a greedy and selfish pig, BUT, I have my integrity and my family and friends and I love my life to be honest. I don't have a lot of money, but that's cause i'm not money motivated. We get by fine and I'm perfectly happy with my lot. I love our home and the location we live in and I am generally glad to be experiencing life. I haven't always been so upbeat, but i've never regretted being born! Honestly, I don't think this is a question we should ask ourselves. We're here and that's it. Why question your own existence? Just get on with it and make the best of it.

boardlady · 28-07-2022 9:53am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119397679#Comment_119397679

Yes. Well put - the journey is the destination. And nobody sits there in a permanent state of 'happiness'. The feeling of happiness is a transient thing, caught in tiny moments. I would say that to be content on a regular basis is a far better feeling to aspire to. But we're creatures with emotions and feelings and all the trappings of society - we have to remind ourselves that we are no better than others, no more deserving than others and we need to constantly remind ourselves of what is good in our lives and what we have/ have achieved, rather than dwelling on what we don't have or what we feel is the negative. I don't sit around constantly buoying myself up either - sometimes you have to allow a bit of feeling sorry for yourself - but then you have to try and move on and out of it. I think a positive mindset is very helpful if you can train yourself to have one!

boardlady · 28-07-2022 9:55am

To answer the OP, yes i'm glad I was born. If I said no, what are my reasons? Suicidal? Martyrdom? I didn't have any input in my birth - ditto my name! Stop pondering the meaning of life and just get on with it, would be my motto!

ancapailldorcha · 28-07-2022 10:05am

Not particularly is the best answer I can give.

Everything seems to be so depressing at the moment. We're seeing the worst of humanity more and more at the moment while the planet is getting worse daily.

I'm trying to be healthy by lifting weights and eating properly, making sure I travel every so often, and reading regularly but ultimately, it all feels a bit pointless.

Pissy Missy · 28-07-2022 10:09am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119397679#Comment_119397679

You have more than 1 girlfriend?

28-07-2022 10:18am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119398247#Comment_119398247

Yes. That is why I wrote "I am content and frequently happy". Contentment is something that can be long term and constant. Happiness is more fleeting and periodic. I wonder if a lot of unhappiness in our world is caused by people spending most of their time pursuing the latter rather than the former.

Love is similar. Even for our children we are not in a constant state of deep love. We probably could not operate in the world if we were. Explosions of love happen periodically and deeply. But most of the time the relationship with our children or partners are close and content and safe and caring.

To answer your last question - yes - I am in a truple relationship with two gals and we have 4 kids between us.

Love and Happiness as you say come in captured moments. And usually in response to something. But it is possible through things like Mindfulness to access moments of happiness without anything external. We do not constantly need our favorite ice cream on our lips - praise from our peers - the latest iPhone - or anything else to attain happiness. It can be found isolated in the present moment.

A sense of purpose seems to be the source of much contentment and resulting moments of happiness for many people. There was a book I can not right now recall the name of about how the Jews who most often survived the camps were the ones who found a sense of purpose even in their pain and torture.

sporina · 28-07-2022 11:04am

thanks for all the replies.. its an interesting discussion..

I often here "life is a gift" etc..

I guess its just sometimes hard to see it as a gift when times are tough..

but I know people who have had a lot of hardship in life but still feel that to be alive is great..

28-07-2022 11:08am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119398595#Comment_119398595

Well as that well known Philosopher - Tuvok from Star Trek - once said "How could one ever recognise light if one has never known darkness".

Many people are not seeing life as wonderful "despite" the hardships in their life - but rather because of them. Because like darkness can define the light - their hardships can outline and define the good in their lives.

sporina · 28-07-2022 11:14am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119398617#Comment_119398617

yeah I get you on that...

and I think perhaps "living in the moment" is v important..

Trigger Happy · 28-07-2022 11:15am

I am a grumpy git at the best of times but I do love life. I am glad I exist and am glad (most of the time) that I am me. God knows I have a lot of flaws but sure that makes it interesting.

Apiarist · 28-07-2022 3:39pm

Yes. I am glad I was born!

The poster above says that everything is depressing at the moment. It is a matter of perspective. I lived and continue to live in the interesting times. Current events are just a continuation of these interesting times, and I am so glad that I am here, in Ireland, and a bit further away from the epicenter of the "fun". I have spent my childhood in the collapsing USSR, I got robbed twice, once at knife point, my family lost all their savings due to the inflation. Coming to Ireland I was lucky enough to witness the happy Celtic Tiger times and bought a house in 2008 which quickly went into negative equity. Lots and lots of crises that I went through to list here. This time? Sheesh, if we do not perish in a nuclear war, I am happy.

threescompany · 28-07-2022 7:15pm

I’m very lucky that I love my life and I’m happy I was born.

I’m an optimist and have always been a very content person. I’m not one of those bubbly hyper people but quietly content in my own head. This is a privilege as I know many others don’t feel this. Even in the depths of winter and a rainy Monday morning I just feel happy.

doesn’t mean I haven’t had very tough times though.

28-07-2022 7:28pm

Glad yes, but not really sure of the point when my folks seemed to despise each others existence. Often wondered why we were brought into this shitshow. It was obvious that one parent didn't want to parent and would rather be out of the house.

The repurcussions of this are that it has hardened my own character and I find it difficult to build new friendships and let my guard down.

It's taken me a long time to realise that most people generally are kind.

I cling onto the hope that the worst days are behind me and my best and happiest days are ahead. I want to give more to the world and society and hopefully that leads to more self fulfillment.

Dr Turk Turkelton · 28-07-2022 8:02pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119400826#Comment_119400826

Sounds like me,I love my life and very glad I was born.

I don't bother much with the news or politics or the latest bandwagon that everyone is jumping on,I just live my own life with my kids and immediate family and friends.

I like going on holidays, partaking in my hobbies and having a few pints. Have no mortgage for the last 10 years and a few quid in the bank so not really worried about money.

I don't let external sh1t that I can't control bother me so I guess I'm living my best life.

SuperBowserWorld · 28-07-2022 8:23pm

My daughter is going through a really tough time with her health. For the past several years. I'm not sure she will survive let alone thrive. I'd give my life if she was healthy and happy. And that's just one of my problems.

I went for a long walk this evening. I'd forgotten it was summer with all this and all the bad news in the world. But it was a glorious evening and the swallows were zooming around. Not as many as years ago, but still the most amazing beautiful birds. Would make your heart sing. And I was so glad to be alive.

cj maxx · 28-07-2022 8:28pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058256231/are-you-glad-you-were-born

I’m glad I was born I just wish I was different.

Pissy Missy · 28-07-2022 8:38pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119401184#Comment_119401184

Different how? No pressure to answer of course

cj maxx · 28-07-2022 8:49pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119401236#Comment_119401236

I wish I wasn’t disabled (MS) and that I didnt for some ungodly reason go out of my way to destroy the opportunities I had not by luck , but because I’d earned them . I fell into the wrong crowd when I was younger.

sully123 · 28-07-2022 8:57pm

I'm glad I was born.

I quite often don't enjoy the my day to day life, but thankfully I've been able to remain optimistic. I don't really want to do anything in particular with my life. After all "there's nothing you can do that can't be done". But I'm glad I'm here

Leg End Reject · 28-07-2022 8:59pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119401293#Comment_119401293

I hope your MS is manageable, autoimmune conditions are a cruel twist of fate.

We all fcuk up at times, especially when we're younger. I know I did and wasted a lot of opportunities too. Puberty just diverted all my attention to partying and boys. 😄

Pissy Missy · 28-07-2022 9:02pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119401293#Comment_119401293

I'm really sorry to hear that 😔 I really hope other opportunities present themself to you somehow 🙏 and no doubt it's made you a much more empathic and wiser person because of it 🌟 I can't fully relate but due to a long term disability and a career that's left me financially broke, I can empathise on some level. Here's hoping there's lots of positivity to come 🤞