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Wearing white to a wedding.

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  • 18-08-2022 8:14pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 8


    I’m looking for a bit of advice, is it ok to wear a white blazer to a wedding? Dress is bright yellow, so no one is mistaking me for the bride in that sense! I’ve had mixed opinions from friends. Some say absolutely no white should be worn and others saying white blazer as a jacket is fine. All help very much appreciated thank you.

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Comments

  • Posts: 1,344 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    No, no & no again....... that's like a golden rule......NEVER wear white to a wedding.



  • Registered Users Posts: 318 ✭✭ThreeGreens


    I would suggest that if someone looks at you the overall impression that they get is "Yellow" then it's probably ok. If the impression that they get is white, then it's not ok.


    But some people see this as a big deal, so it's risky even if you look yellow overall.


    It's the bride's (and groom's day). So why take the risk of causing offence? If you really want to know if it's ok, then put it on and take a photo. Send it to the bride and ask her directly if it's ok with her, or if she'd prefer you avoided white. Make sure you make it as easy as possible for her to say that she'd prefer you wore a different colour withhout making her feel awkward. (Use words like "prefer", "avoid" and "it's no problem")


    If she says she'd prefer you to avoid white, then you've narrowly avoided causing offence to your hosts. If she says she's fine with it, then it's noone else's business and you're good to go.


    If you don't feel comfortable asking her, then don't wear white.


    But it does raise the question.....Why are you even considering wearing something white? Don't you have something else to wear? Just avoid the issue altogether?



  • Registered Users Posts: 1,860 ✭✭✭Pissy Missy


    Just ask the bride, I went to a winter wedding and the bride said it was okay for me to wear a white fur thing you hold around your arms, can't think of the name of it



  • Registered Users Posts: 4,242 ✭✭✭brokenangel


    No chance, not sure why you would even ask

    How many shops and online shops available to buy something in the millions of colours available now without having to wear white

    If you ask as well expect the whole wedding to hear about it, that’s the joys of an Irish wedding



  • Registered Users Posts: 8 deeb123


    Thanks all, guess I’m off shopping on my lunch tomorrow.



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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,325 ✭✭✭cuttingtimber22




  • Registered Users Posts: 1,860 ✭✭✭Pissy Missy


    😂A faux fur wrap shawl is what I meant to say



  • Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,657 Mod ✭✭✭✭Faith


    FFS, of course you can wear a white blazer over a yellow dress. You'll probably have the blazer off for most of the day anyway because weddings are warm events. The idea of not wearing white is that you don't turn up in a white gown that looks bridal. You can wear other bits of white, of course.

    This is what people mean when they say not to wear white to a wedding:





  • Administrators Posts: 14,032 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Big Bag of Chips


    I agree with Faith - a white jacket/coat/blazer is fine. For God sake how many men wear white shirts to weddings?

    The etiquette is to not wear a white dress.

    That's it.



  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    The only way I'd consider wearing white to a wedding, is if it was part of a pattern with another, more dominant colour.

    Anything single piece that is solid white, personally, no I wouldn't.



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  • Administrators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,947 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Neyite


    I think people take the no-white thing way too far.

    A dress that's floral on a white background for example would be fine. A white throw/ jacket? also fine. Those kind of outfits are fine.

    What is NOT fine is turning up in a long all white dress. Like Aunt Sarah in Derry Girls. 😁



  • Registered Users Posts: 20,761 ✭✭✭✭yourdeadwright


    Id avoid it ,

    Some people wouldn't mind a white blazer or jacket ,For example i wouldn't care if you did at my wedding but why bother even chancing it just encase someone is offended,

    I just wouldn't



  • Administrators Posts: 14,032 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Big Bag of Chips




  • Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,657 Mod ✭✭✭✭Faith


    If someone gets offended by the mere hint of white on someone else at a wedding, then the problem is with them, not the clothing.

    As BBOC said, most men are wearing white shirts and no one ever says that’s a problem.



  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    No one is talking about a mere hint of white, and I think the comparison with men wearing white shirts is very silly.

    Nobody compares what men wear at weddings to the bride, and men in general couldn't care less about such things.

    Unlike women, who do like to compete with and upstage each other - even with a bride on her wedding day.

    This is all about etiquette, and part of that includes not wearing anything that will upstage a bride at her own wedding. Of all the colours of the rainbow to choose from, and all the shades in between, find another colour to wear.

    Again, not talking about prints or florals with white as part of the pattern. That's fine.



  • Administrators Posts: 14,032 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Big Bag of Chips


    This is all about etiquette, and part of that includes not wearing anything that will upstage a bride at her own wedding

    If a white jacket is going to "upstage a bride" then the bride mustn't be making all that much effort!!

    I remember being at one wedding where a very good/longterm friend of the bride wore a tight fighting, backless, short white dress. I really judged her that day!

    A white jacket, shrug, shawl, top, trousers, shirt whatever, not an issue.

    I got married years ago and now realise 1 of my friends wore an off white top and colourful skirt, another of my husbands friends wore a majority white top with a small floral pattern around the end, with trousers. The only way I know what they wore is by looking back at our photos. I didn't even wear white 😉

    Men turning up in suits and waistcoats don't "upstage" the groom. And if men don't care about these things.. Maybe women need to also learn to not get offended by a hint of white on any woman who attends!

    A white jacket/blazer is very different to a white dress.



  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    Again, no one here is talking about just a "hint" of white, or patterns containing white.

    A white jacket, shrug, shawl, top, trousers, shirt whatever, not an issue.

    Well, maybe not an issue for you. The bride in this case might feel differently. Personally, I wouldn't wear any of the above in solid white to a wedding.

    OP, as you can see there are differing opinions on this, so maybe the best thing to do is check with the bride and if she's okay with it, then you won't have to worry about it.



  • Registered Users Posts: 3,000 ✭✭✭skallywag


    At an Irish wedding I would keep well clear of it, not because that you are doing the 'wrong thing' in any way, but since there will always be those who want to have snipe and have a go.


    If you want to avoid that I would avoid it. On the other hand, if that's your thing, then go for it!



  • Registered Users Posts: 299 ✭✭Citygirl1


    A white jacket is so completely different from any possible bridal wear, how could the wearer possibly be accused of upstaging the bride!

    I always find it strange that there's such strong opinions on this topic (at least on these discussion websites). Most particularly because, if you look at photos of any of the British Royal weddings, (where every possible piece of protocol is attended to) over the years, the bridesmaids, both adult and little girls, are always in white. Indeed, Pippa Middleton almost became a household name, following the image of her back(side!) in her beautiful white dress. Indeed, almost upstaging the bride....

    Must admit, around 15 years ago I wore a cream dress to a cousins' wedding. Only discovering a few years later, on board.ie, that this wasn't the done thing.



  • Registered Users Posts: 6,148 ✭✭✭screamer


    Look there’s never any other colour people ask about- ok to wear pink to a wedding? Because you just don’t wear white, and seeing as you’re asking, you already know this. It’s one day and one piece of clothing, get a different blazer.



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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,325 ✭✭✭cuttingtimber22


    If a wedding invite says Black Tie, is it ok to wear a white tux but stick with a black tie?



  • Registered Users Posts: 4 JaneFreez


    I think it won't be much of a problem. Unless the bride or groom is a very close friend or relative.



  • Registered Users Posts: 706 ✭✭✭tiredblondie


    Unless you plan on rocking up in a wedding dress, then what whatever you want to wear!

    Wouldn't have bothered me in the slightest if someone had have worn a white dress or blazer or whatever, no one is minding you, all eyes are on the bride!



  • Registered Users Posts: 1,094 ✭✭✭The Cool


    I know this is probably been and gone by now but just thought it was worth pointing out that it's not really fair to go ask the bride "can I wear this?" - because what can she say really? As a bride, how can you nicely say, "actually no that's a bit far, please wear something else" without feeling like an absolute bridezilla, even if you are in the right. If you feel the outfit needs the bride's permission, then maybe just take that as a sign to forget about it in the first place.

    Rule of thumb in general I'd say, if you have to ask if it's ok, then just wear something else.



  • Registered Users Posts: 2,356 ✭✭✭Fiona


    My ex sister in law wore a white dress to my wedding with lace and pearls.

    She hated me so that's why she did it, I didn't let it phase me as I knew she would be the one who would be talked about for years for all the wrong reasons!



  • Registered Users Posts: 4,662 ✭✭✭elefant


    Surely the bridal party wearing white is different, as that would be by the specific request of the bride and groom.



  • Registered Users Posts: 13,707 ✭✭✭✭Dial Hard


    I guess it very much depends on the personalities involved and the relationship between the bride and the person asking. My best friend asked me if a dress she was planning to wear to my wedding was OK and I had absolutely no issue telling her that it was the same colour as my dress (I didn't wear white) and she had no issue choosing something else. I certainly didn't feel like a bridezilla over it.



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