Relocating family to countryside

If you own a house in Dublin you should be able to afford a pretty good rural house.

Of course between releasing the value of your existing home (selling it) and buying a site/building a house in the country you will need somewhere to live in the meantime.

What do you visualise as 'rural'. This could be anything from a one off house literally surrounded by fields (in which case buy an existing house (not an old stone cottage) and develop it, easier, cheaper and more manageable, to a house in a small town or village with amenities to hand - though nothing like as many amenities as you are used to.

Building a house nowadays is a much different experience than it was years ago. There are so many rules and regulations to building now that it is an expensive job that needs a much more complex approach than just finding a builder and asking them to build you a house. And there is a serious shortage of tradesmen - plasterers appear to be a very rare and dying breed judging my recent experience.

Also, depending on how rural you are you will find your options much more limited in finding tradespeople willing to travel to you, they can get all the work they want in the towns and cities. Though the likelihood of getting a greenfield site outside a village or town is now quite slim, be very careful, estate agents are still sometimes willing to describe a field as a 'site' when there isn't a hope of getting planning on it, though this is becoming less likely. If an ad says 'subject to planning' it generally means you likely won't get it.

However, if you have considered all this, how will affect you generally?

Your child will need to be ferried by car to visit friends - the romantic notion of biking around the countryside is ok until you realise how dangerous country roads are now with cars trying to do motorway speeds on roads that are barely two cars wide.

You will need a car to do pretty much anything, fetching a litre of milk can be a car journey, depending on where you live.

You are moving into a different social set up, one that is lovely for a holiday - get away from it all - but may not be quite as appealing on a permanent basis. Can you happily live without city facilities and amenities? Will you miss shops and choice of restaurants and such things as evening classes?

I live rural and love it, but its not for everyone. If you have a life you find satisfactory and enjoyable where you are I would think very carefully about leaving it unless you have a very clear idea of what you want from rural living. And for heavens sake, talk to your spouse, really go into detail about what your plans, hopes and dreams are. Maybe they feel the same way and you are both deferring to each other!

If you are happy where you are, have good schools and like the area I’d be inclined to stay put. Living in the country means getting into the car for even the shortest journeys, due to road conditions.

I’m rural in Kildare and drive to get to a walk as the road is just too dangerous to even think of walking. Lived in a town and loved being close to everything. Much healthier as you are more inclined to walk or cycle to schools and shops.

I cycle a bit but again am terrified of the traffic.

Moving back to your “home” place is also not as easy as you would expect. It’s not so easy to re integrate as your peers will have established their own lives.

My circumstances were different, but examine the "good friends" around bit carefully. I moved away from one set of good friends, but was moving near another set. When I stopped and looked at how often I saw the first set, it wasn't that often at all - while we were regularly in touch, we didn't physically meet up often.

In general I'd suggest drawing up a schedule of what a normal week looks like for your whole family. E.g.

Monday - Person1: work, home, sports club. Person2: work, bar with friendA, home. Child: Creche, dance class, home

Of the things that are not work and home or a family outing, which would you really miss? Are there similar alternatives in the new location? E.g. replacing "meet friend in coffee shop" with "drop over to mum for a pot of tea".

If you have willing friends with a spare room, the monthly trip home could be replaced by a monthly trip to Dublin to hang out with friends.

I have close friends that did just that. Moved back to the rural area they grew up in as childhood sweethearts. They wouldn't suffer from that "blow in" label that seems to pop it's head up in certain parts of the country. They developed a good mix of blended work from home and the kids were pre-school so they went for it. They both have good jobs that require degrees & masters, high pressure jobs, but excellent money.

They're happy enough with the move for now, but were taken aback by the differences their kids future holds compared to their own childhood. Main points are: •The kids can't cycle where they used to be able to cycle, it's off. Done.. •They can't really walk anywhere, things have changed on the farming and road landscape. •They spend way way more time indoors (once it's dark, it's in for the night). •Their carbon footprint has exploded (heating bills, fuel for travel, second car purchase). •They miss walking to local pub/restaurant for food. •There was lots of things that the kids could have done in the suburban setting that they can't do where they are, it seems GAA is a predominant activity where they are now. •One of the kids has special needs (not major) but they need to go to counselling once a week and it's a 50k drive there and back every Wednesday after work & school.

They didn't sell up so there's options to move back and they're carefully looking at long term, when the kids get older and what they'll have to do regarding college, cars and all that goes with that like car insurance, accommodation etc... But they 100% admit that their kids won't have the childhood they had growing up in the rural enclave they grew up in.

Eyes wide open.

Best of luck with whatever decision you make.

Similar to the above post, can you list the "freedom of the countryside and the way of life" for your family in real activities, behaviours? As in, more time with family....will this actually happen given schedules? As in space to roam, is this realistic with increased car useage? Etc etc. Do a critical analysis of what your new life would be like for yourselves v staying where you are. Really tease it out.

I do feel like there's a idea of rural living somehow being more wholesome. Or that maybe rurally raised people couldn't possibly be happy living in a city and vice versa and will always hanker after where they were raised. But I think rural/suburban/city life all have their positives and negatives. Some if these can be mitigated or enhanced depending on how you set them up. It all depends of what your preferences are for you and your family are and how well each type of life sits within that. And it sound like you are doing a lot of thinking about it so well done and best of luck with your decision. Also remember doing nothing is also a decision!

I moved rural from Dublin, it looked great initially but within a year the drawbacks crept in...

Everything is a car journey

Schools were miles away and the infrastructure to support the kids was also a car journey away.

Any sort of trade required was a hassle as it was always a journey out of town for them

Once the sun went down there was nothing to do, unlit rural roads meant our son was not able to travel anywhere unless driven. (Car again)

Having a social life meant using a taxi, which was a 20 euro trip into the town and the same return.

Quickly needed two cars, fuel bills went through the roof for them

Bad weather (frozen roads, snow, floods etc.) meant having to be careful on the roads and power outages were ridiculously frequent in a storm

It ended after a few years (many reasons) and I now live in Dublin near the Luas, the office, the gym.... I will never look back.

It does in Meath anyway....

This is a big issue. Every journey is a car journey. Every pint of milk, every school run, every sports training, every playdate or teenage get together. Every journey is a car journey. That's not a sustainable lifestyle.