What would you do?? Commute vs House size

Commutes only get longer.

Mine was 30 minutes 5 years ago.

Same commute is 55 mins now along with higher fuel costs and parking costs now where it used to be free.

Never hear of the same commute ever getting easier as time goes on :)

If you've got no strong feelings, it feels like stay in same location and buy smaller house makes sense. Close to everything, family, work etc. If and when you outgrow it, move then. So, your life works well now where you are - social life, family life, work life. Why change location unless you really want to?

Sounds like smaller house would be good for at least 5 years - baby gets older, maybe second baby (if any) gets to 3 or 4. You can buy the bigger house in the future if you want - that location isn't going anywhere and it's helpful that its €80K cheaper, so even if house prices go down and there's a bit of negative equity, you should be able to move to a cheaper location.

Personally I would bear in mind, that if circumstances change for the worse (housing market crashes, job losses etc) which house would you be happier being "stuck" in, if moving house at that point wasn't an option? I know lots of people bought apartments or smaller houses before they expanded their family with the idea of moving later on, only to end up in negative equity and not be able to move at that point...

With a family in your future, I'd probably opt for the bigger house (the 80k lower mortgage is also a big plus!) - but I would keep in mind public transport options to city/jobs hub in case you change jobs in the future and fuel/car is not being paid for when choosing location of new house...

People often overlook the social side of life when making these decisions so just keep that in mind . I’m not talking about mad sessions and nights out because they get less frequent anyway .

But there’s a lot to be said for just being close to friends and family just call round or a cup of coffee or for the unexpected emergency. It really is a huge side of life that adds to people’s overall happiness so don’t overlook it if you are going to isolate yourselves from loved ones

The most important piece of info needed for making this decision isn't in your posts so far OP. What are you defining as a small house?

To many, 150sqm constitutes a tiny house whereas many others would feel like they were rattling around the place in a 300sqm McMansion...

That’s not really true though. A long commute (and 50 minutes isn’t horribly long) puts more pressure on the other partner. They will be responsible for all the crèche/school drop-offs, all the pick-ups, all the unexpected things like sick children that need collection during the day or children who get to school and forget their lunch or need to be brought from school to after-school or the morning/afternoon things like carol services, end of term parents mornings, etc. It’s very difficult for two working parents to do that and almost impossible for a commuting parent.

I think another key thing to consider is how secure is your job/company? If it's not very, very secure then I think I'd rather be in Dublin where it would be easier to find a new job and you don't have to worry about extending your commute even further.

I think it would be a lot easier moving out of Dublin in the future, than moving back in if you had to. Prices go up faster in Dublin so you could get priced out in the future.

On one side we have a small house, 80k more, but really close to work.

On the other hand, we have a big house 50 minutes drive away and 80k less.

Surely there has to be a compromise house in the middle that's 40k more than the big house, but 50% bigger than the small house and only 25 minutes away from work?

No brainer for me.

Bigger house.

Tbh all I read here is: would you want to spend 50 days in traffic? Would you want to miss out? Would you….

question should be: what’s better for the family? The kids will most certainly benefit and enjoy the bigger place. What about your wife? Better mindset when living closer to town or not?

also something to consider (I had that when still commuting), if you walk 10min from work to home - have you switched off by then? A 50min commute will defo help to switch off fully which means you are definitely “home” when you are home.

so whatever decision you make should t be about “do I want to be stuck in traffic” but what are the pro and cons. Important thing though is, whatever decision you make needs to work for all of you and never to regret it!

Arklow to Dublin in 50 minutes? Not at rush hour. I'm in Dublin 15 and it takes me 50 minutes plus to get to my city centre office these days

This is really really not a big deal, at least there’s someone there to do it, and it’d be the same if you were living closer, parent at home takes on that or parent working remote, these are things that you have to do in a family, I do the vast majority in our house because I work remote, wife doesn’t, so I can skip out collect the kids all that stuff, this is a minor issue don’t turn it into something as a reason not to buy a big house.

So what are the commute comparsions then?

Arklow to Carrikmines versus living somewhere in and around Carrickmines?

How about somewhere nice in Bray? Only 11km to Carrikmines (opposed to the 58km to Arklow)

Has a hell of a lot more going on than Arklow amenity wise for both the OP and his family but will still be cheaper than a house closer to Carrikmines.

i speak from experience. I have kids and can honestly say: the bigger the house, the better. They may not need that space when 2 years old but kids do tend to grow up. And when they hit their teens, space is definitely needed.

commute: I’m not saying it’s for everyone, I did commute for a long time though (until wfh arrived). 60min to and from work 5 days a week. Not driving but on the bus. Defo helped to switch off and ensured I’m leaving the office on time and not a minute too late.

oh… and the most important part is, I would always advice against living in or close to Dublin 😁. So that alone would be a reason to take the bigger house. Might be a different story if we were talking about cork, Galway etc. but Dublin… best decision I ever made was moving away from it.