Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

Ways in which you've been touched inappropriately

Options
2»

Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 1,244 ✭✭✭Brid Hegarty


    Says you, who's probably not even willing to tell why it is you think I don't understand it. I post an image from the movie, and all of a sudden you know everything I think about it??

    Explain to me what is it I've posted that makes you think I don't understand the movie? A mod says that there was only one example of inappropriate touching in the film, and I point out that he's wrong. Then the mod disappears and you come along to parrot the same put down he made. God almighty!

    Was there, or was there not slapping in the film?? And what is it that I think about the slapping that's so different from what you think of the slapping? Why don't you tell me what you think is happening in the image I posted?

    What is it with boardsies these days? What has happened to the place?



  • Registered Users Posts: 1,244 ✭✭✭Brid Hegarty


    I wouldn't quite describe Fletcher as a pervert!



  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    What’s wrong with this place? Apart from moronic OP’s and stupid in thread irrelevant arguments?

    No idea.



  • Registered Users Posts: 2,279 ✭✭✭Ninthlife


    I worked in Coppers when it first opened. Used to collect glasses etc off the tables and floor.

    I was 17, it was summer time, i was earning some money..i had the arse, mickey, balls, cheeks groped, grabbed, squeezed by women of just about all age groups.....great times. I laughed at it then and do now. Other way round though and I'd be doing porridge.

    Another time on a train i had a drunk oul fella chat shite to me and then grab my leg just above the knee and mutter something..i simply told him do not touch me again in a very serious tone..guess what he didnt touch nor speak to me again

    People and especially the younger generation need to learn to be a bit more about themselves. Instead of going on twitter saying some creepo touched you on the shoulder looking for faux outrage from faceless avatars confront the person and in no uncertain terms make them aware its not to happen again and whether thats in a social or professional setting shouldnt matter.



  • Registered Users Posts: 4,177 ✭✭✭Fandymo


    Schindlers List :shudder: brings back memories of one of my most painful moments of being touched inappropriately.


    I was touched by Liam Neeson helping so many people, it was inappropriate because I was fiddling with myself at the same time. Muptiple tissues used, none on my eyes/nose.



  • Advertisement
  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]




  • Registered Users Posts: 4,177 ✭✭✭Fandymo




  • Registered Users Posts: 6,288 ✭✭✭Jequ0n




  • Registered Users Posts: 1,395 ✭✭✭nigeldaniel


    I think I understand what the OP is getting at. I will not say that anything odd ever happened to me by way of touching an adult. unless I go wayy back to primary school when i was in 4/5th class and the district nurse came to check up on everyone. I took no great notice of it at the time and still dont as she was just been cheeky. besides my mom was standing 10 feet away!

    PS I am a guy.

    Dan.



  • Registered Users Posts: 36,000 ✭✭✭✭BorneTobyWilde


    I think women in general expect the worse from men, it's part of their makeup, because of the way a certain amount of men act. Everyone is painted with the one brush, but in reality almost every man is respectful towards women, but there are so many men, that even 0.05% is a vast amount of men who are creeps



  • Advertisement
  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    I think see was checking to see if your balls had dropped. Not sure if it’s still done.



  • Registered Users Posts: 6,317 ✭✭✭gameoverdude


    I think if someone have had made a sudden motion like that around me I would have been wary at the start(regardless of sex).

    I've probably done similar when wasps were flying around me.



  • Registered Users Posts: 23,718 ✭✭✭✭One eyed Jack




  • Registered Users Posts: 1,106 ✭✭✭turbot


    Once upon a time during halloween, a random stranger, quite a big guy, walked over to me and swung a punch - a close range hook - out of the blue.

    As I had a mask on and limited peripheral vision, I only realised at the last moment. Still my reflexes kicked in and I rolled the the punch.

    I thought to myself, this seemed like inappropriate touching.



  • Registered Users Posts: 4,460 ✭✭✭FishOnABike


    It's happened to us all at some point...

    I must have been asleep whenever it happened to me! Does that make it worse because I don't know or better because I don't know?



  • Registered Users Posts: 6,677 ✭✭✭The Continental Op


    OP sounds to me like you have some form of Autism because what you indicated in the OP are symptoms.

    I'm slightly Autistic and anyone doing a "how to win friends and influence people" touch on the elbow or pat on the back is likely to get a punch in the jaw. Luckily I understand my "issues" and can take corrective action and prevent myself doing what my brain is telling me to do.


    Wake me up when it's all over.



  • Registered Users Posts: 1,297 ✭✭✭Count Dracula


    Some people are more vulnerable, ahem sorry, approachable from a touchy feely predatorial perspective. It is a about control is it not? The mere fact that it has now been blackmarked has actually ascended it to the realms of risky behaviour in the workplace, oh matron. If you are liked you can touch away, in general, you certainly won't get away with it for the wrong reasons. But as I said touching is about control and ownership of the relationship. If your boss starts getting feely, get out of there.

    The last time I was touched inappropriately was after I took part in some real life drawings at the local art centre. For some reason I always seem to be inundated with attention from some of the female artists, some of them are, or sorry, maybe were married. This one time we were having a drink afterwards, I was invited by this one very attractive female, she was quite young, maybe 19 or 20? She wasn't the problem though, her companion was this ludicrously unattractive large overweight behemoth, with really miserable looking eyes and severely blemished skin, she was dog rough, albeit, well spoken. As I returning from the facilities I was essentially shoved into the corner of the stairwell and within an instant this disgusting fag wine breath was licking and biting my neck whilst simultaneously ferociously massaging my groin, she took a good handful all said. She kept on saying things like "oh where did you come from" and something else about trying her new mattress out. It was truly awful and after I told her to leave the pub and meet me in Ranelagh in an hours the ugly chunt agreed, of course I never showed at all. I was too busy making light work of the younger girl who seemed gratefully enamored by me all night. She kept saying things like " oh wow" or " is that for real " , they can harp on some times.

    Happy 2023 gropers, misfeants , alickadoos and all who crave more than they can get. keep doing and enjoy. Yummy.



  • Registered Users Posts: 10,659 ✭✭✭✭Jim_Hodge


    Brid, yet again you demonstrate that you don't understand normal interactions. You're way of the mark in calling those stories examples of inappropriate touching,



  • Registered Users Posts: 1,244 ✭✭✭Brid Hegarty


    Yet again you go out of your way to be obtuse. I said "it doesn't have to be sexual [or violent]... just anything that involves physical contact that you didn't like". If you never had a form of physical contact that you considered questionable in your life, then good for you... or if you do not wish to share it, then fine. Then it would be better if you didn't post.

    If you are more genuine than you seem, and wish to share your thoughts on how I got it all wrong, then by all means.



  • Registered Users Posts: 6,288 ✭✭✭Jequ0n


    But you are equating “anything […] you didn’t like” with “inappropriate”, which is the problem. None of the examples you give in your OP would be deemed inappropriate by most people, which is why everyone is (yet again) confused by your thread.



  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 1,244 ✭✭✭Brid Hegarty


    Well there's a big difference between a "how to win friends and influence people" pat on the back (which I don't mind), and a "how to belittle someone in front of others" pat on the back. I hope you know the difference!

    That article is talking about hugs and such... a completely different thing. You're immediately assuming that I don't like all forms of touch. You're way off the mark and overestimating yourself here.



  • Registered Users Posts: 10,659 ✭✭✭✭Jim_Hodge


    Okay, yet again you have your own standards and norms. Specifically; none of your examples were 'inappropriate touching' as anybody but yourself would define it. Crass, tiresome, or cringeworthy perhaps but not inappropriate.

    If you don't want comments on what you post then perhaps post somewhere like Personal Issues rather than After Hours where you persist in raising bizarre interpretations of everyday interactions and taking issue with the responses.



  • Registered Users Posts: 1,244 ✭✭✭Brid Hegarty



    "If you don't want comments on what you post..."???

    Don't they post comments in Personal Issues too?! You mean if I don't want immature or sarcastic comments on what I post? Or maybe what you're trying to say is that the commenters in PI would be willing to actually share examples of crass or cringeworthy touching and how to deal with it if one doesn't like it? Thing is I don't really see this as a personal issues topic because it doesn't involve one single person in my life. People are willing to have serious discussions about other issues in after hours... such as Andrew Tate for example. I don't see why this should be any different.

    Some of the touching examples I gave could indeed be done as part of bullying some if they were persistent. Grabbing a walkie talkie off someone's waist is inappropriate. Bullies will rarely flat out touch someone inappropriately because they know they won't get away with it... but what they can do is push the limit as far as they as they can go while all the while assessing how the person reacts.

    I'm not sure what would've been a better thread title, but it is surprising that everyone here is flat out against any form of discussion of this topic from the very start.



  • Registered Users Posts: 3,390 ✭✭✭Airyfairy12


    I cant remember every single time throughout my life but these are a few that stand out.

    1. When I was about 6 my uncle slapped me across the face because I took his hat.
    2. When I was 10, my teacher told me to stand up, she grabbed me by the arms and shook me aggressively because I hadn't learned my tables.
    3. When I was 14 and leaving the cinema with my friends, we walked past a bookies that had a few middle aged men standing outside, one of these men grabbed my ass and laughed about it with his middle aged friends.
    4. When I was 17 my first proper boyfriend pulled up my T-shirt and bra in a public space. When I got upset he told me I was far too sensitive, I believed him.
    5. This same boyfriends brother punched me in the arm 'as a joke' giving me a massive bruise on my arm.
    6. At 18, One of his friends smacked me on the back of the head with a packet of biscuits and told me to 'Shut up, woman'.
    7. At 18, in a nightclub, a man grabbed me and forced his tongue in my mouth.
    8. When I was in college I was groped hundreds of time in bars & clubs.
    9. When I was 22, a girl I was friends with in college slapped my arse so hard I had a bruise.
    10. When I was 23, a guy who I thought was a friend raped me but I had no way of proving it so couldn't do anything about it.
    11. I went a bit mental after this and got into an abusive relationship during this relationship I was raped, pushed, kicked, slapped and physically hurt regularly.
    12. A man who constantly pestered me to go out with him saw me out one night, came up to me, grabbed me, forced me to kiss him and physically tried to drag me out, despite me resisting and telling him to get his hands off me, he only stopped when his friend told him to.
    13. My brother was pretty aggressive when we were younger so ive had regular instances with him being violent towards me but one that sticks out was when he grabbed my neck/shoulder & forced me to the ground because I disagreed with him.
    14. Another ex threw me into a radiator leaving me with massive bruises.
    15. More recently, on a night out, my friends brother grabbed my breasts and left me with bruises, he also ripped my jeans.
    16. On another night out recently, I was groped by 3 different men and one of them forced me to kiss him, id actually ran from him & stood near a seperate group of men thinking id feel kind of protected or he'd take the hint but then one of those men groped me 🤦‍♀️


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,248 ✭✭✭SCOOP 64


    Never been touch inappropriately, one day maybe.



  • Registered Users Posts: 1,325 ✭✭✭cuttingtimber22


    Men have a lot to answer for.

    And there is collective responsibility - there are cultural aspects which need to be addressed.

    Not good enough.



  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 23,286 CMod ✭✭✭✭Ten of Swords


    Multiple posts deleted

    Thread Closed



This discussion has been closed.
Advertisement