Anxiety and depression thread (Please read OP)

SuperBowserWorld · 02-02-2023 2:52pm

The Samaritans are volunteers. Some are very experienced and some less so. So, your milage may vary depending on who answers the phone at the time. Don't be afraid to try again.

RabbleRouser2k · 03-02-2023 4:11am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120192037#Comment_120192037

Same. Some are really great listeners, others are...not, to put it mildly.

Graces7 · 03-02-2023 2:50pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120192037#Comment_120192037

In the UK years ago they had a befriending scheme via the Samaritans whereby you could arrange contact with the same volunteer. One such I had even visited me and took me out.

If you feel the interview is not going to be any help etc gently close it and try again later?

RabbleRouser2k · 04-02-2023 1:56pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120196469#Comment_120196469

You used to be able to call into the Samaritans (book an appointment, beforehand, but still free), but with everything that happened in the last two or three years, I don't think that service is available atm.

Sardonicat · 04-02-2023 2:05pm

Suicidal crisis response and listening services in general have become formulaic in recent years, with an emphasis on getting a person off the phone with an agreement to see a gp over actually listening and being with someone in crisis.

Graces7 · 04-02-2023 3:07pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120200893#Comment_120200893

Thanks. I have not had any contact in Ireland so it may well be very different here.

Graces7 · 04-02-2023 3:14pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120200935#Comment_120200935

Ah that is hard. Maybe a responsibility /legal thing though? I remember they had a crisis re a suicide? Not sure if here or elsewhere . It made them rethink and change some of their approaches? It worked so well with them in the past, the fact that they DID listen .. I had a hard time after my mother was killed and they held me . I have rarely had a GP who would do that. I certainly do not have that here. Nor need it thankfully

Sardonicat · 04-02-2023 3:42pm

The Samaritans ethos has changed completely. There was a time when they would commit to staying on the line with someone as they ended their life. I don't know if the law has changed, or what. I would never consider contacting them now.

apache · 04-02-2023 4:00pm

I stopped ringing The Samaritans months ago. They kept on asking me if I was thinking of ending my life. I felt if I said yes they would get emergency services involved so I hung up. There's no point in ringing them now.

I will be 6 weeks in hospital next week and getting discharged. My meds were changed and I went to a lot of groups. Got to know everyone here. Am home for the weekend. Will go back tomorrow night for a few days and then back into the big bad world. It's very safe in hospital. But I learned a lot and will try and use it.

SuperBowserWorld · 05-02-2023 10:41am

Feeling incredibly anxious and alone and have a load of problems to deal with.

Graces7 · 05-02-2023 12:19pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120201364#Comment_120201364

Thank you. It is a great relief to read this as I had realised that and thought I was just unlucky with the one I talked with. Yes it may well be a legal thing. Liability ? Sad though

06-02-2023 12:30am

A shame that the Samaritans have changed for the worse. I have rang them many times in my life and while mixed all but one call was so so helpful. The last time was about 10 ish years ago, maybe a bit less. I remember it was a man I spoke with and he was very kind and comforting.

Other times: In the kitchen in the home house with mam and dad in bed and me trying to be quiet. In my bedroom in that house. In work. Driving in the middle of the night. In a house I was staying in very briefly. In an apartment I was renting. Other times I can only sort of remember. More rooms and car journeys.

For me it was loneliness and heartache. Part of the bedrock of human suffering alongside loss, fear and emptiness.

Multipass · 10-02-2023 3:49pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120201364#Comment_120201364

It helps to read this. I had a bad experience with the Samaritans which made me feel so much more isolated and disliked. I really thought it was just me because everyone else raves about them.

I just wonder if anyone has found anything out there to help. I feel like I’m coming to the end of the road now, have exhausted all the usual services. Feels like I’m fighting against the inevitable.

Sardonicat · 10-02-2023 4:47pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120224517#Comment_120224517

I hear you and I believe you and I understand that impending sense ifinevitably you describe. I know how exhausting that fight is.

Can you try just sitting and being with that feeling? Don't try and fight it but don't try and acknowledge it, either. I have found that gave me some rest when I felt like you do now. You can acknowledge that you have a seriously wounded 'spirit' or 'mind' or 'psyche' - whichever word you feel describes it best - and right now you just "can't " do all the everyday stuff.

Please check back in here with us when you can. We hear you and understand where you are at and we will try to gently support you as you figure out your next step forward.

Graces7 · 10-02-2023 5:33pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120114169#Comment_120114169

Ah no! We each have LIFE. itis not a collective thing portioned out a bit at a time.

And we all get down times. Just now i am caving in to rock bottom but I KNOW that thisis because of far too much "company" this last while when " the authorities" were alerted to my existence and my illnesses out of misguided but so well meaning concern..hospital is the worst place in it all but they did it for my good..Bless them... with the cfs/me and old age I have so little strength. And they misread that as needing comoany/help/support when all I need is peace, solitude in physical terms.. Thankfully my move out to this peaceful offshore island is a great great help! I am far less accessible.

There was a very great lady centuries ago whose " good works" often led her into difficult and even dangerous places. On one such occasion when she was stranded in a river, she looked heavenward and assured herslef, " THIS TOO SHALL PASS>"

And that has become my mantra when things gt hard.. THIS TOO SHALL PASS

Always has and always will

Gremlinertia · 10-02-2023 8:41pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120224517#Comment_120224517

I'm going to add a bunch of links to services here as alternatives to Samaritans as I do understand that a purely listening service isn't useful in many cases, I can't obviously stand over these organisations but there are useful alternatives available, as always, there's an ear here too

Grem

Depression / Mental Health

GROW - (1890 474 474) - mental health organisation which helps people who have suffered, or are suffering, from mental health problems. Grow also hold regular meetings throughout Ireland.

GROW Young Adult - resources specifically to help the needs of young adults.

Aware - (1890 303 302) - service for people who experience depression and concerned family and friends of those suffering from depression.

Shine - national organisation dedicated to upholding the rights and addressing the needs of all those affected by mental ill health.

Pieta House - Suicide and Self Harm Crisis Centre, providing services for those who are in suicidal distress and those who engage in self-harm. Contact information for your local Pieta House can be found here.

Mental Health Ireland - Information Service on issues relating to mental health and mental illness.

IACP - Irish Association for Counselling & Psychotherapy. Provides services to help you to find a therapist in your area.

(help for those under 18 years of age)

ReachOut - services aimed towards providing mental health information to help young people get through tough times.

https://turn2me.ie/

Deja Boo · 16-02-2023 6:54am

Am just off a stressful three weeks... I should be relieved but, I just feel low and weepy instead.

RabbleRouser2k · 16-02-2023 7:26pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120246998#Comment_120246998

As you should. Stress saps our mental energy, sort of like running a marathon with no proper training. Just because it's on sabbatical, doesn't mean it's going to leave you feeling energised afterwards.

Give yourself a break-try and do something that will energise you. Even if it's just Netflix.

Graces7 · 18-02-2023 6:09am

Slowly recouping after an emergency flight to hospital, and the aftermath is lingering. Just drained

Tonight is the first time in a while I am online like this.

But all deep gratitude to our doctors and especially nurses, who cope so efficiently and cheerfully with the overcrowding in the ED ... Trolleys everywhere.

RabbleRouser2k · 18-02-2023 7:28am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120256099#Comment_120256099

Jeez. Glad you're on the mend. And sorry you had to take a spell in hospital. They're not an iota of fun.

Graces7 · 18-02-2023 10:05am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120256123#Comment_120256123

Thank you. I am so deeply admiring of our ED staff.. There were no beds . In cubicles if you were lucky, in the corridors... Been a few years since I was near a hospital..... and the contrast. Just managed a slow amble down the lane here..... Only way is up.

lillycakes2 · 20-02-2023 2:16am

Can anyone tell me is there any way to get a psychiatrist to assess /diagnose a person without it having to go through the GP's? like without a GP's referral? Does anyone know if this can be done , like privately and you would obviously pay a bit for it, but still I just wondered ?

Gremlinertia · 20-02-2023 2:24am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120263640#Comment_120263640

Unfortunately not, this is a quote i took from psychiatry website:

"Can you see a psychiatrist without a referral Ireland?

An appointment with a psychiatrist can only be obtained by referral from a general practitioner (GP) or family doctor, or in emergency situations through a local HSE mental health unit"

https://www.irishpsychiatry.ie/external-affairs-policy/public-information/frequently-asked-questions/#:~:text=An%20appointment%20with%20a%20psychiatrist,local%20HSE%20mental%20health%20unit.

So local hospital may help if you do not have a GP or perhaps a walk in clinic if applicable

RabbleRouser2k · 20-02-2023 3:57am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120263649#Comment_120263649

If it's any consolation, your GP, your private clinic, your hospital, will keep any and all details private. The first step is asking for help. And that's genuinely the hardest part.

Graces7 · 20-02-2023 5:24pm

Do they not see patients privately? Paying of course.

Gremlinertia · 20-02-2023 7:55pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120266040#Comment_120266040

Yes but one must be referred

Graces7 · 20-02-2023 8:11pm

I just read all the info on that. It came across that you could as we used to say" Go private" if of course you paid for a private appointment?

Deja Boo · 21-02-2023 6:51am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120249885#Comment_120249885

Thanks RabbleRouser2k, it really does, and messes with your physical well-being too. Thanks for your wise perspective and advice, I appreciate it!

Graces7 · 22-02-2023 12:01am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120266909#Comment_120266909

See the small print here

Private Practice - Private Psychiatry Ireland - Dr Richard Bunn

RabbleRouser2k · 22-02-2023 4:55am

So today, Tuesday, was a rough day.

It's a year since my dog died. And yesterday, I spent it in bed. I just knew that today I was gonna feel like crap. Genuinely just a 'don't come near me, I will bite your head off for the mildest reason' kinda day. I was just snappy.

Didn't help that I got two letters today about appointments that just messed me up. I find it hard to arrange in person meetings, and I find in person meetings difficult. To say the least. Tried making pancakes, for the day that was in it, but my mind was all over the place from the moment I got up. They didn't turn out well, I think the dogs got most of them.

Then when I could just feel my anxiety was going to be a problem today, I decided to do practical stuff that would make me burn up the energy. Everything from walking, to cutting up firewood. Stuff that would bring a sweat out in me. I was trying to take myself out of the ugly situation that was within me. Even filled up the bird feeders, just anything to take my mind off of stuff. Sky box decided today was the day it would have a conniption, which made everything even more annoying.

I think I was 'lucky', in that I didn't lie to myself, and con myself into thinking today would be 'good'.

Graces7 · 22-02-2023 8:08am

(((HUGS)))) Hopefully today will be better..

Graces7 · 22-02-2023 8:14am

A "bed day" here as staying resting and warm will prevent any darkness seeping in. Tactics are everything. If I add exhaustion to the mix with the CFS.ME I deserve all I then get as I DO know better.

Used to challenge it and the resulting meltdowns were catastrophic.

Long gone are the days when attacking the garden etc sorted things... lol... Older and wiser now.

So more knitting that will sell and feed needy folk,,,, youtube.... make like the cats and snooze. Go with the flow ..Just need to get my feet warm is all...

Graces7 · 26-02-2023 9:04am

Not heard from anyone I thought cared in a long time. Makes me feel sad and even more alone. All too busy clearly.

Deja Boo · 27-02-2023 1:10am

Commiserations Rabble, hope you are doing ok.

I've felt extremely fragile this weekend... and with a busy week shaping up, not looking forward to whatever is in store. February has been rough.

RabbleRouser2k · 28-02-2023 3:12am

Thanks folks, for all the kind wishes. I'm doing alright. Sunday was a bed day, in that I hit the hay around 2pm.I had to be up at 6.30 am the following day, and had an erratic sleep the days before. (I think I got 5 hours sleep on Friday, and Saturday was a busy day, didn't get the full catchup).

Busy day today, but it was alright. Not too stressful.

Graces7 · 28-02-2023 2:26pm

Quiet day here waiting for my Meals on Wheels aka Meals on Curragh food to arrive...longing for "bedtime" although never really got up...

SuperBowserWorld · 01-03-2023 5:26pm

Total wreck here. Can't focus on anything. Burned out in work and constant hard problems at home.

Graces7 · 01-03-2023 7:20pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120302093#Comment_120302093

Is there no way you can get right away for a day say at weekend? Go somewhere you love that will refresh and renew you?

Graces7 · 01-03-2023 7:25pm

Me? I am sad. Hard to explain without being critical of others... Which I have no right or need to be. Folk have busy lives and families.

We old folk have often lost all the family we had, and many friends have moved away... Which is fine and right and good,

But loneliness... Not the kind that can be fixed by a club or organised day or event. Just... no one left...

SuperBowserWorld · 01-03-2023 7:50pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120302496#Comment_120302496

Yes, I need to get away for a break.

Graces7 · 04-03-2023 6:19am

So often we are simply exhausted ...

Graces7 · 06-03-2023 2:50pm

A time for "patient endurance" that can achieve all things..

RabbleRouser2k · 08-03-2023 9:35am

I’ve been quiet for a good week or so.

Was under the weather since the beginning of the month. Had an annoying head cold that also managed to make me pee like a racehorse. (It’s not uncommon, when I get head colds that I tend to urinate frequently. Doesn’t happen when I’m otherwise healthy-weird tangential titbit, I admit). Got a weird ‘brain fog’ too, which other people who’ve had the same cold as I have are saying the same thing. Cough is easing off, at least. Still sapped of energy, but again, it’s common with folks who’ve had the same virus I had, as they’ve told me.

Things, otherwise, have been fine, for the most part.

Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to check my email, or otherwise be engaged online. Constantly blowing my nose and having a ‘snot waterfall’ kept me occupied. And then at the weekend, I was able to check my email, and I got a message that kind of upset me.

My therapist has gotten a new job, and that’s great- it really is. When one person is winning, everyone is, honestly. I’m really glad to hear she’s moving up in the world.

But that means she can’t be my counsellor anymore. And that kind of stings.

Today was our last session. Not my decision, more to do with her new job position.

The reason this upset me is because she genuinely gave a crap. And at times, it felt less like talking to a therapist, more like talking to a long-time friend. When other therapists might be flippant about my problems, especially with the sudden loss of a pet, she cared (And I did have someone who was just that flippant, whilst claiming to be a therapist. Has happened on more than one occasion, sadly). She helped me work through a lot of issues. My panic attacks eased off, greatly. And just talking about loss helped enormously. She gave me tasks to do, homework, journaling, that kind of deal.

But today felt like a funeral. Saying goodbye for the final time, silly I know, but I did my absolute best not to cry (and succeeded, thankfully). For once, being under the weather was a help. The coughing, the voice breaking, I hid being upset better than I’d imagine I would have if I hadn’t been under the weather. Couldn’t thank her enough, to be honest.

Still feels like a death. Strange to say, I know. Feels like I’m being overly sensitive on this, but it hit hard.

Gremlinertia · 08-03-2023 9:56am

You're not being a bit oversensitive at all. It's the end of a relationship and as such you're well entitled to mourn that loss.. As you quite rightly point out, finding a good therapist who is properly qualified AND gives a siht is bloody difficult.

Graces7 · 08-03-2023 9:56am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120328583#Comment_120328583

So very very sorry. Good therapists who really care are like gold dust, Hoping you are blessed with another

Graces7 · 08-03-2023 2:16pm

Grateful for this thread as it has led me to understand some issues etc.

I am not depressed; never was. Simply enduring perfectly natural and normal reactions to life events and illness.

Today is very hard due to several issues including the sheer insouciance of our so called " caring" services re certain issues. Even trying to dictate where I lived... They credit us with no intelligence, and i am happier out here than I have ever been..

Graces7 · 08-03-2023 11:17pm

Why is it that when you are down even worse things happen... It hasn;t "hit" me yet due to that protective " disbelief" protection. When folk we have trusted totally for many years suddenly turn against us... I have no-one left now. My short term memory loss has blotted out details thankfully but it bewilders even more. I did nothing wrong. Of that I am sure. Too old and drained for this life. Just too much. In my small corner alone now. For ever.

RabbleRouser2k · 10-03-2023 1:40pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120332583#Comment_120332583

Sometimes, at least for me, this can sort of be a ‘mental pitfall’ that you fall into. Like a weird, negative domino effect.

Like one negative thing affects our mindset, then the rest of the things can do so. No matter how minor they would seem in any other situation. Burning toast in one morning would be just an ‘oh well, I’m eating burnt toasting this morning’ whereas another day it’s like ‘CAN’T NOTHING GO RIGHT TODAY?!!!’

Sometimes you have to just 'ride it out', that it too will pass. Other times walloping a pillow in frustration can help.

Graces7 · 11-03-2023 8:37am

Alas, my illness makes walloping anything impossible!

Some things are sorted and the kindness of eg the ladies at the far away shop who "pick and pack" my order is more of a help than they will ever know... They add treats to the box as a gift. Sounds a little thing but it is amazingly soothing..They know what I enjoy!

We work on. Day by day and hour by hour.

Today, knitting and youtube abed. Been trying to connect TV etc but the tangle of wires and insufficient sockets has defeated me..... for now.

MAY try again later.... But deeply thankful for youtube. I never had TV so everything is new and I can follow a storyline easily

.

RabbleRouser2k · 13-03-2023 3:58am

Still trying to get over this darn head cold. It's really sapped my energy.

Tumultuous week, what with the weather and everything else. But starting to realise the last few years (lockdown and Covid) has reduced my immune system to the bare minimum, and getting sick this time was like my immune system just wasn't ready or didn't have any guidelines on how to deal with a basic head cold.

So the last week plus change, I've been erratically sleeping, seems like every second day I'm dozing off for the day. Hoping it gets lost, because it's really dragging me down.

Anxiety and depression thread (Please read OP)

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