online dating

Anyone can go back and delete old messages for anyone which is why it's odd because he's clearly sat down to go through and delete old messages.

Yeah maybe when you’re actually dating….

Yes you can. He shouldn’t be dating if he can’t handle rejection. They haven’t even met! She owes him nothings

Even still, going back a day or two after is weird, does he want her not to remember or be able to refer back to. It's definitely sus behaviour imo

You sure you are in the right thread?

The bitter ex husband thread might be elsewhere…

Also..every week? I’d be worried about people who photograph themselves weekly…

I think it's good to manage people's expectations of exactly how much time you have to give to a new relationship. But there's a clever way of doing that without alienating potential partners. I wouldn't put this on your profile. Simply stating you have children is enough for most people to know the score. But a conversation you can have early on is...

"I have a busy family life so we may have to juggle from time to time but I'm willing to give it my best shot if you are open to it and don't mind the occasional disappointment when there is a sickness/babysitter problem etc"

Same with dogs. A picture of a dog in your profile means you have a commitment that can't easily be abandoned for sleepovers, and spontaneous weekends away need a bit more planning. If you're not a dog person at all then you're not going to necessarily have an easy time of it with someone who loves dogs and has two or three of them.

But some people can be overly defensive about their "family" and it does come across as off putting I agree. But I just swipe left and don't give it another thought. It's great when people's profiles give off big warning signs about the type of person they are. Saves me time anyways.

Clearly you underestimate the power of star signs and practical plumbing skills, or else you would have agreed with this valuable sermon.

Worked well. Caught me at second date being an Irish rugby match

On pof. Over 8 years now.

Who said that? It is about leaving the option open that the partner might become the most important person with time.

Actually most relationships fail because people are not choosing each other, only choosing kids after birth, or choosing career, mates, booze etc. How many men are complaining that they become sidelined by kids (and they are fathers to these kids!). And how many women say the same about being sidelined by partner's career. Get a grip.

Speaking as someone who does not have children, if I started dating someone with kids I would never expect to ever rise in importance above the kids. Of course it's not a black and white issue and things will change as the kids grow older and become more independent.

I think "choosing" is not the best term, if we're talking about putting kids first I think it's understandable especially if you're a new partner coming in. With existing relationships, that comes down to communication, I have no doubt that there are partners that neglect their partners when kids come along, this just emphasises my point though, if relationships between biological parents break up because of kids coming first, then there's very little chance of a second partner ever coming first. I'm not saying it's right or wrong, just that it's a completely reasonable thing to put on a profile and it absolutely would not get me riled up. As someone said earlier, it's so easy to just swipe left and move on.

And, yes, I know you weren't the one who was originally riled up.

I see a lot of "my kids are my world" profiles as well and funnily enough the ones I've seen don't have what they're looking for on them which could mean they're only after casual. Something like what happened with Confused11811.

Why are you directing this at women only 🤣 I reckon women are more likely to have a lot of this stuff sussed out because we think and talk about such things.