Work joke gone on too far

Just say it straight out to your joking colleagues that you think the slagging has gone far enough and you’re not comfortable with it any more.

If it doesn’t stop, then it becomes something more serious, and would warrant a complaint to your manager, or HR.

Say it to them first. Would strongly advise not going to HR as the first port of call.

That sounds terrible. Sorry you have to go through that. It is sexual harassment. Either tell them it stops as it has gone to far and is no longer funny. If that does not stop them then go to HR and to the courts if nothing is still done but try and get some recordings of the harresment for evidence first. Then start looking for a job elsewhere and leave.

It's not good for you and its not fair on you.

There is nothing wrong with being single but you should be allowed to be happy and do your job in a happy and safe environment too.

+1 for sorting it out with your colleagues and supervisor.

HR is there to protect the company. Sometimes this may coincide with your interests, but don't bank on it.

The supervisor is useless: behaviour should have been nipped in the bud as not work-place appropriate as soon as it started.

I'd look for a new job with competent people.

You were happy to go along with the jokes until you became the butt of one.

You all sound complicit so I think it's gone past the point of being able to tell them you don't like it.

You want to create a drama. Absolutely bonkers advice.

Don't do this!

You need to stand up for yourself. If someone new is giving it to you then you are probably giving off a vibe that you are an easy target. Worth working on dealing with your assertiveness in general and it will help in every facet.

Nothing like a gang of women to tear one woman to shreds at work. Funny how I assumed from the start of the thread that is was female colleagues. Any sane man in employment in 2023 knows you can’t do this. But the women…

Trust me, men can 100% be nasty, cliquey and as gossipy as any group of women. A lot of men just dont believe this and roll out the tired "women are bitchier than men" cliche but its simply not true. I have worked with men, many in their 40s and 50s, who would make Joan Collins shiver in horror with some of the accusations, gossip and mass spreading of lies i have seen men perpetrate on their colleagues.

But because men dont have the name for being gossips, they get away with it scot free.

Fair enough, but its very prevalent in workplaces. Obviously not all men and women are gossipy but ive worked for 25+ years across a range of jobs with all manner of people and men can absolutely be as nasty and divisive as anyone else in a workplace. I have even seen men in jobs for 20years take a dislike to a new lad and effectively bully him out by exclusion and rumour spreading.

You may not have seen it yourself but that doesnt mean its not happening.

Survival of the fittest. If you expose an entrenched group of people intent on pushing someone out of a job are you seriously saying you would put your neck on the line and try and stop it? For a complete stranger? These kinds of toxic workplaces are everywhere with management too weak or indifferent to tackle it.

What the OP is experiencing isnt right but its a reality of many workplaces today. If she cant get any joy from HR her best bet is to move on to hopefully a less toxic place.

I was trying to think of word for that...only word I can come up with is cowardice.

Far from cowardice.

maybe you go into a job to survive, most go in trying to do a good day’s work, be professional, courteous and respectful of everyone regardless of whether you like them or enjoy their company… not believing in your superior enough to tackle a situation that unveils itself which is in their remit of their responsibility pay grade and position shows a management failure not an employee one..

I’ve experienced legitimate problems in workplaces that managers didn’t want to have to deal with. OP situation sounds similar.

Maybe I'm the exception? Done me no harm.

Actually I found it envelopes trust.

This is definitely harassment. You haven't helped matters by initially engaging in it, but this does not justify it continuing when you've made it clear that it is unwanted. Talk to your supervisor's manager and explain the situation.